Survival: Behind the Walls
by Wings of Wax
Summary: Part two to the Survival series. Now that Eve and her people are safe behind Wall Rose, other problems from the village's past come to light. Her role has changed dramatically, and now she and Alois are responsible for keeping her people safe on the interior. With less than a month before the next expedition, can Eve prove her worth? (Rating for language and violence.)
1. Awakening

Chapter One: Awakening

* * *

**A/N:** FINALLY! I'm getting around to really writing the sequel the way I need it to be written. I know I had few chapters up before, but I just wasn't satisfied with those. So here's a brand-spanking-new version that's better than the other one! (At least, in my opinion…)

I gotta give a HUGE shout-out to MercedesCarello and aniqa1234! You guys ROCK! (No really, I don't think I could have done this without you!)

* * *

Welcome to the second part: Behind the Walls!

* * *

As she sat cross-legged on the little cot, she picked at the fraying sleeve of the shirt she'd woken up in two days ago. Trying to determine the exact shade of yellow it was provided her with a distraction for a while. She thought of the curd from fresh milk that they'd turn into cheese, but no, that shade was too white to match the coarse material of the long-sleeved shirt she wore. Her next thought turned to the way the sun looked in the middle of summer, on one of those days when cloudless, hot rain would pour from the sky, leaving the sun to look washed out and runny like the yolk of an egg. Deciding that that was the closest she was going to come to comparing the color, she glanced around the room.

How many times had she looked around this cell-like room? She'd counted every brick on each of the four walls twice, studied the striations in the wooden door, made a friend out of the little brown spider that lived in a crack at the ceiling above the door, and stared up at the barred window. Once, she'd moved the cot directly under the window and stood on it to reach the ledge of the high window. She'd tried to pull herself up to look out of it, but her body was too weak. She hadn't been able to lift herself six inches, much less the two feet she still needed to go to see outside.

If the room had been silent, she was sure she'd have gone mad by now. There were, however, noises of all sorts coming from both the broken window and whatever lay beyond the locked door that kept her inside the cramped room. She would hear voices occasionally, but she could never make out the words spoken. Shouts and bells and whistles and all sorts of other sounds she couldn't name came in through the window. She'd only known it was broken when she'd tried to lift herself up to look out of it. When she fell back down to the mattress, she discovered small cuts on her fingers. Earlier today, when she'd tried for the second time to glance outside, she'd grasped a large shard of glass and brought it down with her and hid it inside of the mattress. Logically, she knew someone would have to come into the room again eventually. When they did, she'd be ready to fight her way out if necessary. They couldn't keep her locked in this infernal room forever and without reason!

Once when she'd woken up, she'd found a tray of food on the floor beside the door. Greedily, she'd devoured the plate and wanted more. It had never occurred to her to ration the small meal. No one had returned since, though, and the tray remained on the floor. She wondered why the food had been placed there in the first place. Were they really trying to keep her alive? If so, then why lock her up alone? Had she broken some law? Why was it necessary for her to be treated like a prisoner? If they weren't trying to keep her alive, then why not just kill her? Their motives made little sense to her. Whenever she tried to speculate as to their reasoning, it only infuriated her.

For now, she stretched her legs out on the cot before her. The soft brown boots she wore had been her only possession left to her. Shirt, pants, socks, and underwear were all new to her and fit poorly. Everything was too big. She'd taken the belt provided and used it to both keep up her pants and hold the baggy peasant-style shirt to her waist so that it didn't billow around her when she moved. Despite not knowing how long she would be in this room alone or when her next meal would come to her, she'd stretched and performed basic exercises. Her body was too weak, and that disgusted her. When she wasn't lying down and studying every minuscule detail of the room or trying to determine what caused the _bang_ outside, she'd been moving: sit-ups, push-ups, lunges, squats, and whatever else she thought of.

Her boots… The soft leather was worn and the soles needed to be replaced soon. They laced entirely up- more than halfway to her knees. Six buckles had been added later to help keep the leather tight across her calves. The loose pants she'd been provided were tucked down inside of the boots, folded as flat as possible. Fingers dancing lightly over the faded rust shade, she thought about her brother.

Years ago, long before his death, they'd had a cobbler in the village. The old man was ancient, but he had a gift when it came to crafting shoes of all shapes and sizes. Erik had asked the man to create a pair of boots fit for fighting Titans in. Eve was summoned and forced to sit while he took various measurements of her feet and legs. She'd spent much of her downtime watching the man craft the boots. She'd been the one to kill the cow the hide had come from the previous winter. She'd been an old dairy cow- the oldest in the village. When she'd stopped giving milk and deteriorated into a state of misery, they'd slaughtered her and survived for weeks on her meat. The cobbler talked about the cow as he worked the leather through a press, shaping it to exact and precise measurements. Eve frowned and brushed over the laces. The day he'd finished the boots and Erik had found her to give them to her, they'd been attacked and the cobbler was killed. She'd worn the boots with pride, though, and remembered suffering through the worst blisters of her life. Once they were broken in, she'd almost never taken them off.

The memories continued to flood through her mind now that her mental wall shutting them all out was broken down. Aldrich, Christophe's friend from the Garrison that had returned home with him just before Wall Maria fell, had been one of her teachers. He'd been fearsome and courageous. His experience, two whole years more than what Christophe had, brought them to safety inside that forest village. Eve frowned. Her own home had been outside of the forest and closer to a different village that the one she'd called home for so very long. Her family had been ushered to the safety of the trees along with a few other families by Aldrich. Christophe had been running for others at the time. The shabby fence the village had already possessed was fortified, though it still did little good. She could remember her hands full of splinters as she helped repair the fence in between her lessons with Aldrich and Christophe. She, along with her brother and so many others, were taught to use the 3D maneuvering gear and the twin blades. Some, like she and her brother, advanced faster than others.

Then, and Eve could feel the tears coming even before the memory fully hit her, her brother had died. They'd been practicing during their down time, trying to perfect the concept of using momentum to propel themselves forward rather than gas. She'd successfully swung from tree to tree without using a speck of gas. Erik, determined to do the same, had fallen. There was never a time when they practiced without their blades out anymore- it was too risky to learn a maneuver without them and then lose a limb during combat for trying the same thing. She'd watched from a tree in horror as his body was twisted in the steel cable and the blade snatched from his hand, slicing off one of his arms just as the cable snapped his neck. Her memories of fighting to get him free of the cables were blurry and she'd completely forgotten his funeral, but she'd hated the gear ever since. She and Aldrich fought over it every single day until he, too, was killed.

Aldrich's death had been _her_ fault. She knew that, though Christophe had never directly said it to her. It was because she'd refused to wear the damn gear that he'd had to swoop down and save her from a Titan hand grabbing for her. She'd had her own plan, and had cursed Aldrich for interfering. The moment she was in the tree he'd been aiming for, though, the Abnormal Titan had snatched his cables out of the air. She could still see the bald Titan's glossy head as her mentor and friend was devoured whole. Its crooked eyes found her once more when she screamed at it. Without gear, only the swords, she'd jumped forward and slid down over its ear to its shoulder and hacked the back of its neck to pieces, all while its short little arms tried to latch onto her. Christophe had found her a few minutes later, still slicing into the Titan, but at its swollen belly- even as the steam engulfed her and singed her clothes. She'd found Aldrich's soft brown cloak with the roses on the back of it and had pulled it out of the Titan's belly just as Christophe snatched her away before every inch of her exposed skin was just as blistered as her hands.

Voices in the hall outside of her room snapped her out of her memories. Her hand swiped over her face, mopping up the streaks of tears. Her hand went straight for the hole in the mattress where she'd stashed the shard of glass. With both hands hidden by the length of the sleeves, she waited. Every nerve in her body was singing, every muscle tensed and ready to jump. While her body may have still been weak, all of her previous injuries had healed nicely.

There was a light knock on the door just as a set of keys scraped inside the lock. She could hear the tumblers grating against each other. Then the ancient metal lock was flipped entirely, and the door swung open. There were three people in the doorway, and two wore similar expressions of shock. The third looked more relieved than anything. The first two, those who were shocked, she didn't recognize. The third, however, she sneered at.

"Good of you to come, Commander," she snapped. "How long were you planning on leaving me locked up? Just going to try to starve me to death?"

"How long have you been awake?" he asked. He was resigned, not surprised or upset. She wanted to stab him and make him pay for leaving her to resort to her memories for a lack of anything else to do. She studied him for a long moment before answering. He looked clean enough, but the dark circles under his eyes and the way his hair was tousled told her that he was exhausted in no small way. She'd never seen him look do disheveled before, and that was off-putting.

"Two days." He sighed and looked over at the men at his left.

Those men looked horrified by her answer. Their plain uniforms of tan told her they held no rank or position of importance. If they were military, then they were grunts or trainees. Their soft shoes left her leaning towards ideas of medical assistants of some kind. They stared at each other for a brief moment, then seemed to notice Erwin's pointed look. One of them stepped back and ran down the hall. Eve's hands shook.

"I apologize for their lack of attention," he stated. She shrugged, but had noticed that he hadn't come into the room and his body blocked the only exit. She wondered momentarily if she was strong enough to fight her way passed him. The measly shard of glass in her hand felt useless when she thought about having to use it on _him_ of all people. "I suppose you have questions."

She rolled her eyes at him. "With those powers of deduction, no wonder they made you the commander of the Survey Corps." Her tone was biting and sarcastic. He smirked at her despite the blatant insult. "Where are my people?"

"Settling in," he answered. She narrowed her eyes at him, expecting a much better answer. His blank expression told her she wasn't going to get anything better than half-assed responses for the moment.

"Am I allowed to leave?" She could feel the shard of glass in her hand biting into her skin.

"You aren't a prisoner here." That wasn't an answer, she thought. His next look to her was with narrowed eyes. She caught his eyes darting down to her hand and cursed when she realized her palm was full of blood and it had started dripping between the cracks in her fingers. "Drop it." She lifted her hand and obeyed, the shard falling to the cot in front of her. The remaining man at the door slid by the Commander and darted into the room. He snatched up the glass and ran it back over to the Commander before vanishing from the room.

"Planning to stab me and run?" he asked dryly.

She shrugged. "I just want out. I was prepared to kill the king himself if he was the first person to step through that door." Erwin's smirk relaxed her. She grabbed the sheet on the cot and wrapped it tightly around the cut in her palm. It wasn't very deep, but she didn't need to lose any blood. "When?"

He'd understood the abstract question. "Soon." His equally abstract answer only annoyed her. "When those two return, they will bandage up your hand and give you a bite to eat. After that, you are to come with me to go see General Pixis." Her stomach, empty as it was, knotted painfully. He didn't appear pleased to deliver this news to her.

"Fair enough," she choked out. Before she could say anything more, the second man had returned with a vanilla-colored bucket full of medical supplies. She paid him little attention as he doctored up her hand. The sandy-colored head was bent down over his work when his darker companion returned. Erwin actually stepped out of the way for him as he carried the dark blue tray into the room. There was little more than a loaf of bread, a wedge of cheese, and a thin slice of meat, but she was ravenous. She chewed the meat first, devouring it as fast as she could manage. With the bread and cheese, she took a little more time. She'd take one small bite of cheese and a large bite of the bread and chew them together. It was a meager meal, but enough to satisfy her for a short time.

When the blond finished with her hand, he retreated just as the brunette had. They both hid behind the Commander. She ignored all three of them while she ate, and wondered why they hadn't brought her any water. After the bread and cheese was gone, she sighed. Her stomach was full beyond capacity now, but she felt so good for assuaging the hunger pains that had begun to get the best of her. Erwin dismissed the two behind him and she stood once they scampered down the hall.

"Let's go." She sighed, but was resigned to follow him. Part of her expected him to slam the door in her face as soon as she got near it to prevent her from leaving the room. She was an outsider here, and knew that few people would trust her. Erwin was probably one of the few that did trust her- at least to a certain point. After all, she'd dropped the shard of glass at his order. That had been as much of a show of obedience as it was her symbol of trusting him not to leave her locked up any longer. Once they were both out in the hall, she breathed a sigh of relief. She looked around frantically. Her room had been at the very end of a long corridor with several other doors similar to her own. How many other people had been locked up here in this asylum?

"Where are my things?" she asked. He glanced down at her when she stepped up to his side. Remembering the pain of walking from before, she was glad the gash in her leg had healed to a pink, fleshy scar. How long had she and her people been behind the Walls? For her leg to be healed so far along, it had to be more than just a couple of days… The thought of that, as once before, made her nauseous. With plenty of food in her stomach, the pain wasn't quite as intense, but she needed something to drink. Her dry throat was making it difficult to keep her food down.

"Your people took the majority of your belongings, including your horse, with him to the small district we had them settle in." As they moved by a small table loaded with supplies of all sorts, Erwin reached over and grabbed a large container of water. He passed it to her before they continued. The slight, graying woman sitting behind the table almost protested, but when Eve began guzzling the water, she pursed her lips. Eve did not return the container.

"And my clothes? My gear, my belt, my sweater?" She gestured to the ridiculous outfit she was wearing now. "These are far too big."

"Not a main priority for the moment," Erwin clipped. She scowled, but bit her tongue to keep from insulting him. She had to keep in mind that she was no longer a major player in his game. She was just a refugee now. Whatever part she had left to play wasn't going to be of her own design. This was foreign territory to her, and Erwin was the only soul she knew. She had to have a least enough faith in him not to stab her in the back.

She kept her thoughts to herself for the moment. If she wanted answers, she'd have to weasel them out of the Commander when she was sure they wouldn't be overheard, or she'd have to find someone else. Armin would have been her first choice. It would be easy to use him- to manipulate him into giving her all the information she wanted. It surprised her, just for a moment, that she didn't feel guilty for considering that as an option. Armin had been a spy for Erwin against her, though, even if he hadn't intended to be. She couldn't forgive him for that. At least, not until she knew exactly how much he'd revealed.

The corridor turned just after the table where Erwin had taken the water. The second hall was shorter, but ended in a long staircase. Erwin led the way down, and Eve took the time to fall back. She stared out of the windows at the bustling city outside. They were a few stories high- high enough for her to detect construction in one part of the city leading all the way to the Wall that loomed in the distance. She had never been to the interior before, and what she knew of it had been nothing more than rumors passed along. If she had to guess, she'd say they were behind Wall Sheena, though. The streets were cobble and glistened in the sun. There was no dirt or trash to be found here. The people that meandered about didn't look rushed or particularly worried about anything. They were well dressed and several were bedecked with jewelry.

Her fists clenched. The scrape on her right palm throbbed, but it didn't deter her anger. Those people in the streets below her were ignorant of her struggles and her pain. They didn't understand what it was like to live every day in fear. They had their Walls to cower behind and they had the time and the money to waste on frivolous activities. She wanted to scream at them, to drag them all out into the open to witness the true horror of the Titans- just like she'd done to Lacey. Erwin seemed to sense her anger and stopped on the stair case. They were about half-way down to the next level. She looked down at him, eyes narrowed.

"Leave them to their ignorance," he muttered. He turned his back to her and they continued walking. "You wanted to afford your people the same luxury, after all. From now on, they should be able to live their lives in peace, safe behind Wall Rose." He was right, but at least her people knew what they were living apart from. They knew the sacrifices that it took to keep the people behind the Walls safe and alive. They would not take their easy lives for granted.

The decent down the stairs continued. When they reached the next floor, they had to move to the other end of the hall before they got to the next staircase. Eve was silent, passing more doors like the ones on the previous floor. She couldn't help but wonder if anyone behind those doors was like her- locked up for days without food or water. Again, she found herself gritting her teeth to keep from snapping about how poorly she was treated. She might be a refugee, now, but damn it, she was a citizen in this kingdom, too!

Erwin gave her no direction or explanation when they reached the bottom floor and exited the building. She was now out among the people she'd looked down on and criticized. A few would look at her, a little surprised by her appearance, but they just moved on. Other didn't even spare her a glance. She struggled to keep up with Erwin as his fast stride carried him across the street. She wanted to stop and look at everything. The richness of the area was appalling to her- and beautiful. Buildings beautifully built and lined with gold with huge stained-glass windows all towered over her in their magnificence. The few times she'd been to the large city between her village and Shingashina District was the only experience of this sort she'd ever had- and the buildings when she'd seen them were mostly ruined or had fallen into disrepair.

"Watch out!" Eve's head snapped to the side and she neatly darted out of the road, away from a fast-moving carriage. The driver shook a fist in her direction, but she knew that she could have killed him easily if she'd cared to, and that made her feel a little better.

"Keep up," Erwin said sternly. She scowled at him once more, but jogged over to his side and attempted to match his pace. Her legs were too short to fall into perfect step with him, but she made up for it with speed. When Erwin paused at another street, she took a moment to guzzle more water. Her dehydration was getting to her now, and she felt she was going to need ten more of these containers of water before the day was over to make up for all that she'd missed. Between the food and the water and the fresh air, she felt her strength returning gradually. She had to jog to catch back up to Erwin- who seemed determined to both leave her behind and have her keep up. They continued to dart around the city before they eventually reached another building- one not so regale as the others Eve had seen on this little field trip. Rather than a large, elegant door, there was nothing more than a thin cloth nailed up to block the entrance. He pulled it aside and gestured for her to go in.

She took one step inside, but went no further until Erwin was by her side once more. It took a moment for her eyes to readjust to the darkness after being out in the bright sunlight, but once they did, she relaxed. Before, she'd only been able to tell that the room was full of people all seated at low tables. Now that she could make out details, she began to recognize familiar faces.

"Eve!" Several members of the Survey Corps were on their feet and making their way toward her within a few seconds of her arrival. "What happened? Why haven't we seen you in so long? What's going on?" She held her hands up in a defensive position and looked up at Erwin.

"I don't know anything," she admitted. "You'll have to ask him." She jerked one thumb over at the Commander, but he turned and stepped over to the short bar to the left of the doorway. Armin, Jean, Reiner, Sasha, Connie, and even Eren and Mikasa were all surrounding her- keeping her from darting over by Erwin's side to grill him for proper answers.

"How long have you been awake?" Sasha asked. "Are you hungry? Come sit down!"

"I've been awake for two days, and no, I ate a little just before we left…" She knew she couldn't eat more at the moment. "I just need water…" And with those words, four canteens were thrust in her direction. She chuckled nervously and accepted one of them- she didn't know whose.

"It's been three weeks since we got here," Armin told her, a small frown on his face. "Were you out for that entire time?"

"I think the term is 'coma', " Jean said. He looked her over. "She looks skinnier than before."

"She does, doesn't she?" Connie said thoughtfully. Eve frowned. Why did it matter? "I've never heard of someone sleeping for three weeks…"

"She said she doesn't know anything…" Reiner muttered darkly. He looked down at her, his golden eyes narrowing. She felt the pit of her stomach tighten once more. "You should probably go sit down."

Armin grabbed her bandaged hand. "A lot's happened…"

* * *

**A/N:** Ahhhhhhh cliffhangers! The bane to every reader and the joy for most writers! (one of them, anyway- me, anyway)

Hopefully it won't take me too terribly long to crank out another chapter (wrote this one in just a few hours!)

Read and review, y'all- it makes a world of difference. (And I'm pretty positive there are probably a few grammar mistakes lingering around there somewhere... Catch 'em for me!)

Seriously, makes me feel like it's Christmas freakin' mornin when I get those emails! ;)


	2. Realizations

Chapter Two: Realizations

* * *

A/N: Sooooooo…. Let me know what you think of this one!

* * *

Shuffled around several tables towards a spot in the back, Eve was forced to sit in the center of the table. She'd insisted on having her back to the wall. Armin sat on her right and Jean on her left. Reiner sat directly in front of her with Connie and Sasha to one side and Eren and Mikasa to the other. She could see various other faces among the other tables- some she'd seen at her village and others she did not know. Her stomach fluttered with anxious butterflies. She could make out Erwin on the far end of the room, sitting at the bar beside Hange and Levi. They were having a heated discussion in low whispers.

Three weeks? It didn't feel like three weeks had gone by, but that explained why she felt so weak. Those around her danced in their seats; she guessed they were waiting for her to ask questions, but she still needed time to process what little bit they'd already told her. "Why are you all here?" That was an easy first question, she thought.

Armin sighed and she turned her head to look over at him. "To get you and take you with us back to headquarters."

"She still has to talk to Commander Pixis first, though," Jean cut in. "Look, it's going to be hard to explain everything if we just bounce around." He looked irritated.

"Then start from the beginning," Eve grumbled.

"When all of your people were safely inside the Wall, we formed a border around them to keep the citizens from really noticing them. Our orders were to take them up to Wall Sheena first so that they could be debriefed." Reiner paused for a moment when she took a drink from the canteen in her hand.

"That was the easy part," Connie muttered under his breath. Eve frowned, her brows furrowing. Her eyes continued to dart around, looking at each of the faces surrounding her. They all wore similar expressions of worry laced with tinges of sadness.

"The Wallist Cult members found out about them before we made it to Wall Sheena," Eren spoke up. She threw him a hateful look. He had no right to speak in her presence, as far as she was concerned. "They tried to keep us all out- screaming about how everyone in your village had been claimed by the Titans already and they had no business bringing their curse inside the Walls."

"They were all furious," Sasha mumbled. "Your people were scared. Some of them started asking questions and then everyone began to panic…"

"Crowd control," Mikasa clipped, "was no easy task."

"Lacey… Lacey died." Eve's eyes went wide with shock. So far, everything they'd told her hadn't even made much sense. She'd already known her people were going to be questioned, but what was a Wallist Cult? That single sentence, though, make perfect sense. She couldn't remember much from the last leg of their trip to Wall Rose, but she knew she had the impression of Hans' death. With both of them gone, who had stepped up to lead her people?

"H-How?" she choked out, staring at Armin for further explanation. He appeared pained by the crushing news he'd just delivered. Why was he upset? Lacey was the woman who'd taken on the role of mother for everyone in her village, but Armin couldn't have known that.

"She'd climbed out of the carriage to try to plead with some of the Wallist guys," Jean spoke, his tone flat and factual. That, Eve felt, was more appropriate. She wanted facts without opinions or thoughts. "A few of them started screaming at her to get back, and one of them hit her really hard. We were all just standing here, and watched it happen." Jean's voice cracked just slightly.

"The Commander stepped in after that, though, and he forced the Wallist guys back so that we could all get inside," Reiner continued. "One of your people got Lacey back into the carriage, but she was already dead."

"Who else is dead?" Eve breathed. She took a few deep breaths to keep her composure. Determination not to break down in front of these people filled her.

"Hans, Klaus, Doc's wife, um…"

"Susanne," Eve whispered.

Armin nodded and continued, "A little girl named Janette, Orlan, and Karen." Everyone at the table was staring at Eve with varying expressions from pity to guilt to nervousness. She took a deep breath and everyone paused to give her a moment to process their deaths. Her grief could come later.

For now, she had to know, "What else?"

The conversation was interrupted just before Reiner opened his mouth to answer her. Commander Erwin and Hange appeared behind him. Erwin had a mixed expression of boredom and annoyance while Hange's insane grin was firmly in place. She looked up at them for a moment before standing. "We need to go." Eren stood as well, and the two of them made their way back over to the door.

"Where are we going now?" Eve asked. Exhaustion seeped into her bones and her posture slumped.

"We have a meeting with Commander Pixis," Erwin answered curtly. They filed out of the dark room and back into the street. Eve blinked in the blinding sunlight, but managed to keep up with the paces of the other three. Her mind wanted to reel over the deaths she'd just learned about, but she had to push those thoughts away for now.

This trip was far shorter than the previous one. No one spoke as they made their way up the little side-street and over to a bigger one that was far busier. Eve bristled as Eren walked beside her. She still did not trust him- still hated him for his mere existence. She found herself envisioning him transforming into a Titan and rampaging through the city. If that were to happen, she knew she'd be next to useless. Not only was she lacking her gear, she didn't have any weapons. As she gazed around, looking for anything to use to defend herself with, she noticed that Erwin and Hange were both un-armed as well. Eren wasn't even in his military uniform- just plain dark pants and a white shirt.

The small group headed across the busy street at one point, and made their way to a plain-looking building that stood a few stories tall. She could make out the Military Police Brigade's emblem emblazoned on a sign above the door. Her anxiety grew and her hands began to shake from it. They entered the building and Eve was a little surprised to find it almost as bright inside as it was outside. There were only a few military personnel lingering about, and most of them looked bored. Eve wondered how they could be bored with so many Titans out just beyond their little Wall. Wouldn't their time be better spent coming up with solutions to eliminate the Titans once and for all? She knew that was almost an impossible goal, but it was better than looking at these few people just lounging on the corners of desks or fanning themselves with a stray paper.

The company moved by them without a word. Eve threw them a nasty look, and they responded with glimpses of surprise at her gall. No words and several flights of stairs later, they wound up in a large, plain room with a single desk towards the back center. The man seated in the chair behind the desk stood upon their arrival. The three soldiers before Eve saluted, but Eve herself felt uncompelled to mimic their actions- she wasn't a solider.

"Good afternoon," the man said pleasantly enough. The hairs on the back of Eve's neck stood straight up. Her nervous tick, pulling her braid around to play with the ends of her hair, returned with a vengeance. She'd thought she'd tamed the reaction years before. The balding man smiled at them, his narrow eyes almost closed from the effect of his cheeks lifting. He stepped around from his desk. "At ease." Those in front of her relaxed their positions.

"Eve?" Erwin glanced back at her. She understood the look without being told and stepped forward. "Commander Pixis, this is Yvette Marks, the so-called leader of the small village of people we brought with us on our return."

"Wonderful to meet you," the Commander said, his smile growing slightly. He held out his hand for her. The space between them was too great for her to simply accept it without moving. No, she'd have to take a few steps forward. She was being singled out, and that made her nervous. Not only was this man she did not know to her front, but the Titan Eren was at her back. Her foot shifted forward as she made to take a step closer. She was surprised when the Commander met her in the middle, closing the gap efficiently. She accepted his hand. The handshake was meant as a friendly gesture, she was sure, but it didn't feel that way. Instead, her impression of the man grew more negative.

"Miss Marks has only just awoken two days ago, and she knows very little of what's happened since she and her people arrived," Erwin told Pixis.

"Good, good," Pixis said, nodding. Eve frowned. "Miss Marks, we have quite the conversation to have. First, though, I'd like to care of a little bit of business with Mister Yeager." Eve nodded and stepped back into her place behind Erwin. She felt better with the wall behind her. There, at least, she didn't have to worry about someone attacking her from behind. Eren took her place at the front, but the older Commander had moved back to his desk. The chair creaked as he sat.

In the moment of silence that followed, Eve looked around the room. There were a few maps pinned to the walls, but little else by way of decoration. The desk itself was cluttered with papers and books of all sorts. Pixis didn't seem to be at home in the mess- he struck her as someone who was painfully organized. This room was not his standard office, she realized. Who did this desk and chair belong to?

"Sir?" Eren asked, wondering why they were standing in silence for so long. Pixis pulled out a single sheet of paper from one small, neat stack and grabbed a pen.

"Just a few questions," Pixis said at last. Eve stared him down, wondering what he had to say. "Did you transform at any time for any reason in the last two months?"

"No, Sir," Eren stated. Eve's eyes narrowed. She couldn't know if he was lying or not.

"Excellent, less paperwork for me. Now, I understand that for the majority of the time you were in Miss Marks' village, you stood guard. I've been led to believe that there was a bit of abnormal Titan behavior- especially leading up to the day you all left. What are your thoughts?"

"Sir?" Eren stammered. Eve rolled her eyes and scoffed under her breath. She was aware of Hange's cocked eyebrow over her shoulder. "There were Titans attacking at night, Sir. I've never known them to do that… Also, it seemed as if their numbers increased steadily from the time we arrived to the time we left. We captured a Titan one night, and it was still incredibly active despite the late hour."

"Who authorized the capture of this Titan, and why was it necessary?" Pixis' question was aimed at Erwin this time.

Eve stepped forward with a deep breath. "It was necessary to capture a Titan and show it to the true leader of our village- a woman named Lacey. She had never actually seen one. It was only once she was persuaded that we needed to leave that the rest of my people agreed."

"I see…" Pixis jotted down something on a separate sheet of paper, then turned his attention back to Eren. "Are you the one who told Miss Marks of your ability to change into a Titan?"

"No, Sir," Eren answered. With a nod, the Commander scribbled more words on the paper reserved for Eren's comments.

"Alright, well that's all I have for you," Pixis said with a dismissive wave. "Squad Leader Hange, yes?" The woman at Eve's right nodded. "Please take Mister Yeager here back to wherever the rest of you are. Miss Marks and I have quite a long conversation ahead of us." Wasting no time, Hange and Eren gave one final salute before they filed out of the room. "Commander Erwin, you are not required to remain."

"If it's not any trouble, Sir, I'd like to stay." Eve was both relieved and annoyed by this request. Pixis nodded once, then gestured towards the two chairs resting against the wall to his left.

"I see no reason for you to stand." Eve waited for Erwin to move first, then followed him to the wall. She grabbed her own wooden folding chair and sat it near Erwin's, but out of arm's reach. "Now, tell me Miss Marks, what are your intentions now that you are here behind Wall Rose?"

Eve narrowed her eyes at him. "I intend to secure proof that my people are safe. After that, I'd like the opportunity to become a member of the Survey Corps."

"Why?"

With a sigh, Eve began, "Because I have no other talents. I cannot cook, and I've forgotten everything I used to know about farming. My life has been consumed for the last seven years with killing Titans. I am useless otherwise."

Pixis chuckled at her. "I see! So, despite just now achieving the safety and peacefulness behind Wall Rose, you wish to go straight back out into the chaos. It does make me wonder, you know: is there another reason you wish to leave the Walls?"

Understanding washed over her like a bucket of ice water. Her dry throat burned as she looked for the right words. Anything less than an absolutely perfect answer would probably discourage him from allowing her to join the Survey Corps. Her eyes darted over to Erwin, but his face was carefully blank with traces of just enough mild curiosity so that he didn't seem suspicious. She gritted her teeth for a moment before answering. "I betrayed my people when I discovered Eren Yeager's true nature and allowed him to continue to roam amongst them. Whether or not they know or believe that to be true, I do not deserve to remain with them and take on the role of the local burden. I cannot even care for the child that is now my responsibility. My talents lie, as I've said, in killing Titans. I can also provide knowledge of the current state of the majority of the lands around my village- including a fairly secure route to Shingashina District."

Erwin tensed beside her, but she was determined not to give indication that she'd noticed. Pixis' eyes actually opened for the first time as he gazed over at her. "I see. You are determined to join the Survey Corps, then?" She nodded once. "Very well." She breathed a sigh of relief. "Your participation will be, much like Eren Yeager's, conditional upon your usefulness. I understand that the Corps has no intention of leaving for at least a month. Gathering the amount of supplies required to continue laying out their supply route takes time. During this period, the 106th trainee squad will graduate and they will choose their placements. This is a very unique opportunity, Miss Marks, and I have a difficult time believing that you possess all of the skill sets that we require of our soldiers."

"I can kill Titans," Eve snapped, losing her patience with the man, "is that not enough?"

"No," Pixis countered. His tone was just a clipped as hers, but held far more authority. His gaze hardened. "There are a number of other talents that will be beneficial to you as a soldier. Hand-to-hand combat, rifle mastery, and basic first aid are only a few examples. I am going to require you to have a proficient understanding of these things before I will allow you to embark on the next expedition outside Wall Rose." Eve's hands curled into fists, but she nodded. "I'm tempted to force you into the cadets to reform you into a proper soldier, but based on testimony from those who were with you at your village, I've decided against it. Do not make me regret that decision. I want proper soldiers in my military, Miss Marks."

"I understand," she muttered through gritted teeth. He nodded to her once.

"Now, we've interviewed your people extensively, and it seems that we have a large portion of your movements in the last seven years accounted for already. However, it was also disclosed to us that you were one of the few to travel as far as necessary to obtain whatever supplies your village needed to survive. You've been to Shingashina, obviously. How many times?"

"Five," Eve answered curtly.

"Did you venture outside of Wall Maria?"

"Yes."

"How many times?"

"Once."

"How far did you go?"

"About fifty kilometers southwest, then I returned to the gate and went another fifty kilometers southeast. I spent a total of four days outside."

"How many Titans did you interact with?"

"Only a handful. However, nearly every one of them was an Abnormal." The elder man's thin eyebrows lifted in surprise. He made yet another note, then his expression settled down once more.

"Interesting. Now, why did you go outside Wall Maria?"

"I wanted to know what it felt like," she whispered. "I wanted to see if it was any different. Alone, I didn't attract much attention from the Titans. I could move freely. I doubt I will ever be able to explain the sensation." Eve felt herself slip back into the memory of watching that first sunset outside the Wall. It had been the most magnificent thing she'd ever seen- not because she knew there was no longer a Wall blocking her from the real beauty of it, but because she'd been completely and totally free. She could still picture the mountains that crowned the horizon, permanently snow-capped despite the summer season. The tips glowed bright orange, then pierced into the darker pinks and reds, and finally consumed by the deep purple and black of starry nights.

"Tell me about the trip that your former leader, Micah, took to Wall Rose."

Eve sighed and the pleasant memory was shredded into tiny fragments. The feelings of bliss and freedom were replaced with those of fear and paranoia. Her gaze drifted to the floor as she fingered the end of her braid. "Micah wanted our people to be safe. At least, that's what he told us. Thirty of us set out for Wall Rose that spring, after the trees had begun to grow back and provide additional protection from the Titans. We only lost four on the trip there."

"How many years ago was this?" Her head snapped up. He wasn't looking at her, only writing.

"Two? I don't remember exactly."

"Go on," Pixis goaded. At his next glance, she nodded and focused on a small, dark spot in the grain of the wood on the front of the desk. Her eyes unfocused as she pictured the scenario in her mind.

"When we reached the Wall, we weren't at a gate. He scaled the wall with his gear, leaving the rest of us on the ground. He spoke to someone up there, but I don't know who. All I could see were the shadows. A few hours later, he came back down. He only told us that we'd been turned away. Everyone was asking why, but he never answered our questions. We were forced to leave. He told us that if we didn't get out of there soon, we'd be stuck on the plains in the dark- and he was right. It was the only other time I remember Titans attacking at night. They ambushed us, killing almost everyone- including Micah. Six of us made it back to the village."

"I am sure it comes a little consolation to you, but no one ever reported that incident to us," Pixis said softly. She blinked, pulling herself away from the memory of her and Otho huddling inside a small cave, terrified that they'd be crushed. His expression was one of pity. She felt herself hardening towards him. "Do you have any idea who he might have spoken to that day?" She shook her head.

"Like I said, I only saw shadows. Probably a man, though, about Micah's height… So… 180 centimeters? Similar build, too. 75 kilograms max."

"You could see that in shadows?" Pixis asked. Eve stood up and looked around for a moment. The setting sun was shining through the window behind him, casing their shadows against the wall with the door. She turned around and pointed to her own.

"My shadow alone doesn't say much- I appear taller and thinner. Will you stand up, Commander Erwin?" He nodded and stood a short distance from her. She pointed to his shadow. "Now we have a point for comparison. One can easily see that he is male and much taller and broader. Imagine two shadows similar to his, side by side. I knew how tall Micah was, and about how much he weighed. Making the comparison isn't difficult when you have that much information to go on."

Pixis gave her a sly smile and nodded, satisfied with her answer. She and Erwin regained their seats. Eve wrapped one arm around her stomach as it rumbled at her. She was hungry again, and parched. Both Commanders looked at her. Erwin had a small frown, but Pixis seemed amused. "Tell me, Miss Marks, what do you know of a group of people who call themselves Wallists, or members of the Church of the Wall?"

"Only what I was told just before we came here," she said. "A few members of the Survey Corps that stayed in my village told me about what happened when they were bringing my people here. A group of those cultists prevented their entry to the Wall and when Lacey attempted to reason with them, they killed her." Her volume was controlled down to a painful level of calm, but her tone sang with anger and agony.

"Unfortunately, yes, her death was a result of a blow to her head," Pixis said with a regretful smile. "The one responsible has been punished accordingly, I assure you. Do you know why these people disliked the idea of your people entering Wall Sheena?"

"Eren Yeager said something about them screaming that my people had been cursed and shouldn't be allowed to bring that curse inside the Wall."

Pixis nodded once. "That's in the official report we received. I want to offer you a small explanation, though I don't want you to believe I excuse their actions. These people worship the Walls that protect us. They pray to them to keep us safe. The monarchy has granted them certain rights that involve vetoing any decisions made about protecting the sanctity of the Walls themselves. The fact that people have been able to survive without the protection of our Walls for so long is astounding, and that frightens them. In the weeks since your arrival, we've shielded your people from their threats and torments. They are now secured in a small agricultural district- they are farmers now. I couldn't think of a better place. We've stationed a squad from the Garrison to keep an eye out on the town, but so far, there's been no Wallist activity in that area.

"Now, what you need to know is that they are doing everything in their power to persuade the highest ranking military personnel, and even the King himself, to force you all to leave. We won't let that happen as long as _you_ can prove useful to us. Your survival encourages many of us in the military, and we want to know everything you did to keep your people alive out there."

Eve wanted to vomit. She understood perfectly now that her people could still be turned away, they could still be exiled and forced back into the world of barely surviving each day. She stood violently, tossing the chair back with the force. It clattered to the floor, folded. Grabbing the sides of her head in frustration, she stomped over to the door and made tight circles. Erwin was standing- watching her like a hawk. Pixis only looked intrigued.

"You're telling me that the fate of my people still rests on my shoulders- even though they are safe behind the Wall, I still must do everything in my power to protect them?" Eve faced Pixis, dropping her hands as they formed into fists once more. "Are you fucking kidding me?" She slammed her fist into the wall behind her, only successfully bloodying up her own knuckles. "I don't want that responsibility anymore! I can't protect them! They made it all the way here, and even after that someone died!"

"Eve…" Erwin held out his hands in a defensive way. He was trying to calm her down, but his tone was stern, warning her that this sort of behavior was only going to get them all kicked out.

"How can you do this to them?" Eve shouted, too angry to care. If they were going to be forced away, it might as well be sooner rather than later. No need to let them become comfortable and complacent. "Those people have sacrificed _everything_ to get here! I forced this decision on them because I thought they would finally be protected and safe. I thought I wouldn't have to be responsible for them any longer!"

"Those who have power are rarely afforded the luxury of throwing away their responsibilities," Pixis remarked. "I am known commonly as a butcher for sending out troops-including trainees- to fight in Trost District two years ago at the second appearance of the Colossus Titan. If you will, think of the situation in this way: as long as you perform well and do as you are asked, your people will remain here in safety."

"And if I die?" Eve snapped.

"We'll figure something else out," Pixis answered with a slight shrug. "I've been told that two of the boys from your village wish to join the cadets later this year. Also, another of your people, Alois, wishes to join the Survey Corps with you. The same responsibilities will be given to him."

Eve took a deep breath. She wanted to scream some more, but she knew it'd get her nowhere. How was it fair to place such a burden on a young boy like Alois? He was only nineteen. He'd never been directly responsible for keeping their people safe and alive before. Sure, he'd helped with supply runs and with taking down the Titan threats, but he'd never had to have the mindset of knowing what to get, where to get it from, when to go, how to rally the people together to ration supplies, and taking on the guilt when someone died. It wasn't fair, but then, she thought, when was anything in this world ever fair?

"If you'll excuse my poor behavior, Commander," she muttered, "I'll accept your conditions."

"I understand your desire to leave it all behind you," Pixis said softly, "but that is a luxury we cannot afford. Now, I know you must be tired and hungry. It's become quite late. Take the night to rest. You'll be leaving tomorrow morning to return to the Survey Corps' headquarters." Eve picked up the chair from the floor and placed it against the wall where she'd found it. Erwin mimicked her actions. "Oh, and one more thing, Miss Marks. We will be evaluating you before we allow you to leave on the next expedition. Keep that in mind as well, would you?" She could only nod.

Erwin glanced over at her for a moment. When he decided that she posed no personal threat to Pixis, he turned and moved to the door. By the time he opened it for her, she was at his side, ready to leave.

_What next?_

* * *

A/N: Did I get Pixis right in this one? He's kinda hard to write…

Anywho! Review for me please! I really appreciate it!


	3. The Calm

Chapter Three: The Calm

* * *

A/N: I know this chapter is a little slow, just bear with me. I needed this one to prepare for the next few chapters. Just a heads up: I wrote the majority of this on my phone, so if there are any egregious errors, please let me know! Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

Eve was steaming on the entire walk back to the little bar where everyone else was waiting. Erwin did not try to speak to her, just let her lag behind and take her anger out on the sidewalk beneath her feet. She cursed everything she could think of: Pixis, the entire military, those Wallist assholes, the Titans, the Walls, herself… She flexed the hand she'd punched the wall with, causing fresh bits of blood to squeeze between the cracks in her skin. The pain was enough to keep her in control of her anger.

When they arrived at the bar, she deliberately ignored everyone and sat down at the little bar alone next to the wall. The desire to leave them all and escape back into the chaos that was the world outside of Wall Rose was strong. The only thing keeping her rooted to her seat was the very real possibility that her people would be banished should she attempt something so brash. Her pride had been wounded, and she was given almost no time to nurse it back to health.

"Eve?" Her eyes were narrowed and dark when she turned her head to look over her left shoulder at Armin. He had a small, nervous smile on his face.

"Can we talk?" she hissed under her breath. The smile slipped from his face and he nodded once, suddenly solemn. She stood up abruptly, the barstool scraping against the wooden floor slightly. He followed close when she headed outside. Wrapping her arms around herself in a poor attempt to keep the biting wind from slicing through the thin shirt she wore, she looked around for somewhere they might have a conversation without being overheard. She studied their surroundings, noting a small alley between the wide bar and another building she assumed was a small shop of some kind. She headed for the dark, narrow space and smirked.

There was a large wooden box pressed up against the bar. With the low roof on this side of the building, she was certain she could climb on the box and pull herself up to sit in relative peace. There were no windows on that side of the second and third floors, so being overheard was a limited concern. Her goal in mind, she slipped into the alley and clambered up on the large wooden box. When she glanced over her shoulder for Armin, he was staring up at her, confused. She said nothing, just made her way over to the roof and latched on to the ledge.

Lifting herself up, even from chest-level, was far harder than she expected it to be. She cursed herself. Back in the village, she'd been able to climb trees with branches higher than this with ease- even with three broken ribs. She flinched hard when Armin's hands grasped at her waist and shoved her up high enough for her to climb the rest of the way on her own. He waited until she was settled on the ledge of the roof before climbing up himself with ease.

"What's wrong?" Armin asked. She frowned. Even now, he just looked grateful- like the fact that she was speaking to him again was the best thing in the world.

"You lied to me, Armin," she accused. He frowned and looked down at his hands, his hair falling in her face. She sighed. "However, I trust you more than anyone else here. Commander Pixis told me that I was responsible for keeping my people safe behind the Wall. My actions will determine whether or not they, and I, are allowed to stay."

Armin looked over at her, a small sad frown pulling at the corners of his lips. "That's… I'm sorry, Eve."

She gave him a heavy sigh and pulled her arms tighter around herself. The bitter wind cut through her thin clothes, chilling her down to her very bones. "I wanted to leave them all behind, Armin. I was so tired of being responsible for their lives… Commander Pixis has reminded me of the total impossibility of that ideal. As of now, I'm a conditional member of the Survey Corps, similar to Eren. I will be evaluated before I'm allowed to go with you all on the next expedition. I have to prove I've been reformed into a proper soldier."

"We can all help you with that," Armin offered softly. She tilted her head to look at him thoughtfully. "You have the hard parts mastered, so it's only a matter of simple basics for the rest…" She turned her head back to look out at the dark side of the building across the alley.

"I have to prove that I'm _useful_," she spat, bringing her knees up to her chest. "How am I supposed to prove that, exactly?"

"We'll come up with a way," Armin said with a light shrug. "We all have our moments out there when we're securing the supply route. And you have a heads-up on most of us: you know how to get to Shingashina without all of us dying in the process. That's useful, isn't it?"

She remained silent for a moment. He was right, she supposed- at least to a point. "Alois wants to join the Survey Corps with me. He'll need to learn everything as well. Commander Pixis said that if I die, the burden of proof would fall to him. He's only nineteen… I can't let that happen. He won't be able to handle the pressure."

"Don't be so negative," Armin chided with a gentle smile. "We will figure something out. You're freezing… Let's go in. I know you must be hungry, too." She nodded and uncurled her limbs. Just before Armin hopped down, she stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Do me a favor?" She stared into his big blue eyes, searching for any sign of a lie.

"What?" The burning curiosity showed up once more. It almost softened her gaze, but she was resolute.

"Don't lie to me again." He opened his mouth as if he were going to protest, but she shook her head before any words came out and he shut it once more. "I'm serious, Armin. No matter what it is, no matter how much trouble you think you'll get in- do _not_ lie to me."

"Eve…" He was still trying to say no.

She sighed. The last thing she'd wanted to do was threaten him. "Believe me, Armin, when I tell you that you won't like me if I find out you've lied to me again. I'm not the nice person you seem to believe that I am." That burning curiosity in his eyes intensified, hiding a layer of pain. She let him go. Pinpricks of old memories were trying to force their way into her mind. She stared down at the wooden box below, redoubling her efforts to keep the memories at bay.

"Okay." She looked back up at him and found him resigned and almost depressed- shoulders slumped down and hair hiding his eyes. "I promise. I won't lie to you again."

"Thank you." She hopped down onto the wooden box, then onto the cobbled ground of the alley. "Now… how do I go about getting food here?"

Armin landed on the ground beside her and gave her a weak smile. She could see that the promise she'd just forced him into was weighing him down. Despite that, she felt reassured. She couldn't have him spying on her any longer and reporting back to Commander Erwin or anyone else. Secrets were bound to come to light when she went to visit her people- she needed to know what Armin was planning on telling the others to have suitable explanations ready. Some things could not be explained away with a few words…

"Come inside." She followed him around to the front of the building. Captain Levi, dressed in street clothes with a dark cloak, was approaching on the dark street. He adjusted his gait last-minute, but she'd seen the limp. Her eyes narrowed at him. "Captain?" Armin gave a quick salute, but Levi dismissed him with a quick wave of his hand. He tossed the curtain to the side as he slipped into the bar. Eve and Armin entered just behind him, but all the saw was his black cloak vanishing up the small staircase behind the bar.

"Have a nice chat?" Erwin asked, drifting by them on his way up the stairs after Levi. Eve did not respond, only watched him mount the stairs. She cursed under her breath, but decided that it didn't matter what he'd heard. He had to expect something like that from her, right?

Armin led her to a seat at the bar and she sat down on a stool beside him. The large woman behind the counter waddled their way, a glass and rag in hand. "What'cha need?"

"Something to eat?" Eve asked. The woman sort of chuckled at her.

"What'cha want, dearie?" She grabbed a bottle from a shelf under the bar and poured the water from it into the glass in her hand. She sat it before Eve and she guzzled the entire thing, earning another chuckle. The woman refilled the glass, but left remainder on the counter in front of Eve.

"Something hot," Eve breathed. She forced herself to drink the second glass slowly. "I don't…"

"Just bring her that stew you had earlier if there's any left," Armin spoke up for her. She threw him a grateful look. The large, matronly woman nodded and headed over to the massive fireplace tucked into the corner. Eve frowned into the glass in her hands. The realization that she didn't even know how to live behind Wall Rose struck her with a deep pain in her chest. Even before the fall, her interactions with others had been limited to the few small villages around her family's farm. She had a vague impression of money and how it worked, but it had never been a major concern of hers. Anything she'd ever needed had been provided for her, or she'd just gone and taken it from some abandoned place.

"Becoming a soldier isn't the only thing I need to learn how to do," she admitted dryly.

"You'll get the hang of things," Armin said with a small smile. She wondered internally if he was glad that she now had to rely on him. She'd be lost in this capitalist world without a guide to show her around. "It's not so difficult…"

"Armin… I was fifteen when the Wall fell. I'd never been to an actual city until we started going out for supplies for the village." Eve could smell something wonderful coming from a steaming bowl the woman behind the bar was walking over to her. She sat it down before Eve, found her a spoon, then grabbed two large loaves of hard bread and placed them on a plate by the bowl. Eve ripped a piece of the bread off first and dipped it into the thick stew. She bit off a piece and almost melted right off of her bar stool. It was delicious- fatty chunks of beef, chopped carrots, onions, potatoes, mushrooms, and little green peas all floated in the hearty liquid. Eve ate another few bites of the bread soaked in the stew before picking up her spoon. She forced herself to eat it slowly so she didn't overfill her stomach as she had earlier.

"Meat is a rare treat for us," Armin told her softly. "Enjoy it while you can." She nodded once, then looked over at him thoughtfully.

"What about when you're outside of Wall Rose?" she asked. "Doesn't anyone hunt?" Armin shook his head.

"I think Sasha's the only one who came from a hunting village," he said with a shrug, "but she's never said anything about hunting for us."

"I guess it is hard to get enough meat for everyone in one trip," Eve muttered. "I'll have to talk to her about it for the next expedition… Between Rosa and Klaus, I learned quite a bit. I can't compare to them, but I can kill my own dinner if necessary."

"That's useful," Armin remarked with a small smile. Eve rolled her eyes and continued to eat. When she couldn't eat anymore, she left the spoon in the bowl, but wouldn't let the woman behind the bar take it.

"Commander Erwin said my possessions were with my people..." Eve trailed off, thinking of her small bag of clothes and the thin, pale gray quilt she'd brought with her. Her drawings had all been stuffed into her bag as well. Those were now her only reminder of home. When would she be able to get those things?

"We found a uniform for you before we left," Armin mentioned. "Though I don't think anyone thought about anything else you'd need." He looked over at her sheepishly. "It's really too late to take care of that now. I don't really know what we can do."

"Don't worry about it." Eve shrugged and picked at the loaf of bread, nibbling at the crust. "I can just sleep in this shirt. It's certainly long enough." Armin chuckled and nodded in agreement. "Are we going to see my people before we go to headquarters?"

"You'll have to ask Commander Erwin about that," Armin stated. "I think it's on the way, though, so maybe we can."

"Well, if Alois is to join as well, we will need to collect him." Armin nodded. "And I can get my clothes and check on Leonardo. I'm sure Mina is taking care of him, but I worry..."

"We will get a few days of downtime before we go back out again," he said. "You could spend that time with your people." Eve nodded once.

"I don't want to waste this but I can't eat anymore," Eve admitted, gesturing to her bowl.

"Hey Sasha!" Armin called, waving the bright young woman over to the bar. She came bouncing around the tables and stopped short just a few centimeters away. "Do you want the rest of Eve's food?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed, a bit of drool already forming at the corner of her mouth. Eve surrendered the bowl. She thought Sasha was going to choke from how fast she was scarfing it down. Armin chuckled and leaned close to Eve.

"Her nickname used to be Potato Girl," he whispered. "Remind me to tell you the story sometime." Eve looked at him with one eyebrow cocked, but nodded her agreement. Sasha passed the now-empty bowl back to Eve, then gave her a large grin.

"Thank you!" Sasha plopped down on the empty stool next to Eve. "Did I hear you say something about hunting?" Eve nodded with a light shrug. "I never thought about hunting on the other side of the Wall before. We should ask about that on the next expedition!"

"Would certainly make for a better dinner than what we usually get." Eve looked over shoulder at Jean. "Just a heads up- Sasha snores."

"So do you!" Sasha shot back. "You're louder than I am!"

"The only thing louder than you is a train," Jean remarked casually. "Right, Armin?" The blond on Eve's right held up his hands defensively with a nervous grin. "Come on! Back me up!"

"Armin isn't the type to tell outright lies," Sasha countered with a triumphant grin. Eve chuckled. Jean and Sasha continued their back-and-forth, each trying to get Armin to decide who snores louder. Eve laughed lightly.

Was this what it was like to live without the constant fear that a Titan could destroy your home and everyone you loved in a single moment? She found herself longing to feel the sense of ease they had, but every time she tried to relax, an unfamiliar sound from outside or a shout from one of the soldiers behind her would make her tense up once more. She yawned first, and found it humorous that Armin, then Sasha, and finally Jean all mimicked the action within a few seconds of the one before. Maybe, she thought, she could learn to live again- not just survive.

Eve learned a while later from Armin, after her yawning continued at regular intervals, that they would be sleeping in the rooms above the bar that doubled as an inn. Normally, they would have just borrowed a few rooms at the Garrison's barracks, but with the recent influx of freshly-graduated trainees, they didn't have the room available. The Military Police had downright refused them even two rooms- an expected reaction. The rooms in the inn were small, but most contained two beds. Eve would be sharing with Sasha. Sasha showed her the way to the fourth floor and the third door on the right.

The two beds were shoved against opposite walls- one beside the door, the other by a window. Eve found her new uniform on the bed by the door. She held it up to gaze at it. The supple leather jacket was brand new. Before she even slid it over her arms and let it rest on her shoulders, she knew it would be too big. It didn't fit like Sasha's or Mikasa's- theirs were snug while hers hung loosely. She frowned and wondered how large the rest of the uniform was going to be on her. She sighed and shrugged off the jacket before folding it and moving the entire pile that was her new uniform to the little dresser that sat beside her bed.

Sasha traipsed over to her own bed and flopped down before pulling her boots off. Eve followed suit, but began undoing all of the buckles. She noticed a tinge of pain her left side as she bent down to start on the buckles, but paid it little mind. There were bound to still be pains after breaking three ribs...

"You'll have to have new boots, too," Sasha remarked as she stood. She left her own pair at the foot of her bed and picked up the small leather satchel that sat beside them. Pulling out a soft pink night shirt, she continued, "Maybe the man who fits everyone can come out to headquarters." Eve shrugged and pulled off her first boot, then started on the second. She was focused on her boots as she heard the rustling of Sasha's clothes while she changed. Eve frowned to herself.

"This uniform is going to be too big." Eve looked back up just as Sasha pulled the shirt down over her head. Eve couldn't help but notice how muscular she was, and frowned. She pulled off her boot and picked then both up to toss them at the foot of her bed. "Is there anyone who can tailor it for me?"

Sasha shrugged. "Krista is good at patching holes and replacing buttons. Maybe she can help." Eve nodded and vowed to keep that in mind. She sighed and stood, unbuckling the belt at her waist. The pants were so loose, they almost fell off as soon as she did so. She pulled back the blankets and sat down to take off her socks. "You don't have anything to sleep in?" Eve looked down at the yellow shirt that fell almost to her knees.

"No, but this is fine for tonight. I'm hoping we can stop by my village on the way to headquarters tomorrow to get my things. One of my people is planning on joining the Survey Corps as well, so he will need to come with us..."

"I have an extra if you want it," Sasha said with a grin. "I have nightmares sometimes. I wake up soaked in sweat, so I make sure I always have something to change into." Eve frowned. She knew all too well what that was like...

"I think I'll be okay." She was reluctant to change in front of Sasha. What would the girl say when she saw how thin Eve was compared to her?

"Catch!" Sasha tossed the spare gown across the room. Eve caught it easily. The fabric was the same pale blue that Susanne's dresses were. It made her ache for the woman, and for Doc. How was he holding up after losing his wife of over 50 years? She didn't imagine that it was easy for him. With a resigned sigh, Eve stood and pulled the yellow shirt up over her head. She heard Sasha's light gasp and flushed pink. "You're so thin... I can see your ribs." Eve frowned and grabbed the blue gown. She was dressed again as quickly as she could be. She felt more embarrassed at having Sasha see her now than she had when Armin had helped her change so long ago. At that time, she'd felt confident that the massive bruise had been more of a distraction than the sight of her ribs.

"I was in that coma for three weeks," Eve mumbled, scrambling for an explanation. She didn't want to admit that she had spent almost a year eating as little as absolutely possible so that she could give more to Annalise even before there was an infant growing inside of her. She thought of Leonardo. At least he had been born strong and hearty, despite the early and messy birth. Images of Annalise bloody and cut open came to mind. She shoved those thoughts away and looked back over at Sasha.

"No wonder your uniform doesn't fit!" Sasha turned and grabbed her pillow. "Don't worry, you'll get enough to eat now. We might not get meat very often, but we eat well enough." Eve didn't respond, just copied Sasha as she fluffed her pillow. It wasn't that she couldn't have had enough to eat back in her village, but during the winter months, it was especially hard to feed everyone, and Annalise eating had been more important. She stood and moved across the smooth wood floors to turn off the gas lamp. With the room swathed in darkness, Eve climbed back into bed and pulled the heavy quilt up to her chin as she curled up on her side, facing the wall.

Somehow, even after being asleep for three weeks straight, she was still tired. Her dreams were dark swirls of uncertainty, but at last, there were no images of dying women and children and monstrous Titans eating her friends whole. She did not wake every few hours drenched in sweat, heart racing, and paranoid. It took Sasha shaking her shoulder for a long moment to get her up and moving the next morning. She found the small washroom at the end of the hall and scrubbed her skin raw as fast as she could manage in the cold streams of water. Once she was dressed in the ill-fitting uniform, she joined the others downstairs for a simple breakfast of plain oatmeal.

"Good morning, Eve," Armin greeted. She nodded at him before settling down on the bench with the warm bowl in her hands. "Did you sleep well?"

She nodded, but began to shovel her food into her mouth. When she'd woken up, she been starving. Pains were shooting through her midsection all morning because of how hungry she was. The others seemed to find her eating strangely funny, yet they did not laugh- only eyed her with mild pity in their expressions. She did her best to ignore them, but was pleased she didn't have to try for long. Upon Erwin's appearance, he announced that everyone had exactly five minutes to be ready to leave.

Eve smirked over at Sasha. They remained seated while those around them scrambled to finish eating and run to get their belongings. Sasha had already gathered their things in her satchel and the long strap crossed her chest from where the bag rested on her hip. They ate what they had left, then headed outside to wait for the others.

* * *

A/N: Well, let me know what y'all think!


	4. The Storm

Chapter Four: The Storm

* * *

**A/N:** Okay! So this part has some juicy stuff in it, and I hope you all like it!

Second: Mercedes Carello, Baena Cullis, Oliver Ungabwe, and Fhalz Lathan do not belong to me! They are the magnificent creation of MercedesCarello from her amazing works "The Jaguar" and "The Burning Titan". (Go check those out!) I was so lucky to get to borrow them for this chapter (and for another couple of chapters in the future).

A huge shout-out goes to MercedesCarello for helping me out so much with this chapter! I am forever in your debt!

Now… Enjoy!

* * *

The horse Eve was given was a beauty. Lean and muscular with a shining black coat and close-cropped mane, he stood at fourteen and a half hands high, a few hands shorter than Ada. He was christened Osten. She stroked his nose and whispered his name. He whinnied at her and shook his head. She grabbed the saddle appointed to her and readied him like the others around her. The stables were located near the gate that lead out to Stohess district, she learned. They'd pass through there first, then continue on through the interior of Wall Rose to make their way to her village. Osten began to stomp his feet impatiently. He was just as ready to embark on this trek as she was.

The trip was slow-going at first. Making their way through the busy and crowded district continued to be an annoyance to Eve and Osten. She found it amusing how a horse she'd never met before seemed to share her personality. Ada had taken on certain aspects of Eve's personality over time, but they'd been together for over six years. Osten was still young. She recognized his behaviors from when she'd watched Rosa work to break in the foals. Osten still wanted to run free, and she was disinclined to refuse him that desire. While she knew very little about raising horses, she'd known how to care for Ada, at least, and they'd spent the majority of their years together galloping through the plains as they raced against both Titans and time. The rush of the wind and the feel of Ada's movements below her ranked as one of her favorite past-times. She longed for that sensation once more, with Osten and the absence of the threat of Titans.

Once they passed through the final gate in Stohess, there was only a small city between Eve and the wide, open plains. The pace of the entire group increased slightly through the city, and they were all-out galloping once they broke free of it. Eve noticed the patterns her fellow riders took up. It was a small copy of the large formation the Survey Corps frequently employed. She slipped into a place in the rear and the group shifted just slightly to accommodate her presence. Erwin lead the formation, with Hange just behind. Mikasa, Eren, and Armin were all towards the front, with Reiner, Connie, Sasha, and Eve taking up the rear. Levi was nowhere to be found; he'd left much earlier that morning.

It was cold. The sharp wind tore at her loose braid and snapped the strands of hair around her face. Despite the jacket and long-sleeves, she shivered. Once she adjusted to the cold, she let a smile form on her face. Osten was almost flying through the air, jumping every chance he got and relishing in the freedom of being able to run. Eve had to keep his reins tight to make sure he didn't run away with her, but she was enjoying the freedom as much as he was. For just this moment, she had no worries, no fears. She could let go of her stress and just enjoy this ride through the beautiful, late fall countryside. The relief was incredible. She felt as if she and Osten could jump into the sky and never come back down. The temporary high was exhilarating.

All good things must come to an end. The company began to slow as they rode through a group of small farms, each with a different sort of vegetable growing in the rich soil. Little was left, save for a few batches of corn here or there and what she recognized as potato plants. She noticed the scorched black earth from where select plots had been burned away to prepare them for the coming spring. She frowned when the small outcropping of houses appeared on the horizon. They'd only been riding for little more than two hours. She'd assumed it would have taken longer to reach her people. There was a single hard-packed dirt road that lead to the village. Two soldiers from the Garrison were strolling around on the road; two Garrison soldiers on foot were strolling around on it, but stopped when they spotted the troop. Just under a dozen soldiers, including Eve herself, came to a halt at the edge of the village.

*The two soldiers saluted for a moment to the Commander, but he dismissed them almost as soon as they'd fallen into place. "All quiet?" Erwin asked. They nodded. Eve remained at the back, a sudden feeling of dread churning in her stomach and making her ill. The girl, a tall, slender blonde, was eyeing her with curiosity while her shorter, male companion had a hard look behind the glasses that reflected the sunlight. Erwin glanced over his shoulder to Eve and waved her to the front. With a sigh, she and Osten clopped over to his side. "This is Yvette Marks." The soldiers must have known who she was, for the girl's cheery face broke out into a wide smile while the boy relaxed slightly.

"We've heard a lot about you," the girl spoke up. "I'm Baena Cullis and this is Fhalz Lathan. 'Cee wants to meet you before you leave." Eve nodded to her, but couldn't seem to make herself speak just yet. She spotted several people milling about the houses less than fifty meters away. Was that Mina's long blonde hair she spotted shining in the bright sunlight? She felt two desires, each with equal force, colliding within her. One desire was to run away, to leave as fast as she could and never look back. The other was to jump off of her horse and dash over to Mina and the rest of her people.

Her mind was full of what-ifs: what if they hate me; what if they blame me for everyone's deaths; what if they don't want me here; what if they turn me away? She was given little time to reflect, though, as she was ushered forward along with the others to where a small gathering had formed just on the edge of the village.

Mina was smiling brightly, tears shimmering on her cheeks as she held the wailing Leonardo in her arms- already he looked much bigger and healthier. Alois was by her side, one hand on her shoulder. Rosa and Christophe were side-by-side as well, though Rosa did not look happy and Christophe looked weary. Otho came to a halt behind everyone else, but she could see him eyeing her with relief. There were only a handful of other people. Eve only hoped that they were in the fields and not dead. She spotted Doc last. He was leaning heavily on an old, dark cane. The poor widower looked worse than she'd ever seen before. He was unshaven and his clothes were rumpled and bunched. She half expected to see Orlan slip into the group with Otho and Lacey to come running over to her, but Bren was the one who came to greet her as she slipped out of Osten's saddle and her feet hit the ground.

"Where have you been?" The boy's tone was accusing, but the huge grin that split his dark face in half warmed her. He latched onto her in a quick, ferocious hug, then let her go. "Are these people feeding you?" A small half-smile found its way onto her face. It was painfully obvious that he'd taken on more responsibility and had grown up in the short time since they'd been here. She could have sworn he had physically grown some, too.

"I was in bad shape, Bren," she muttered. "I was asleep for three weeks- in something called a coma." He frowned slightly. "I'm alright now. I woke up just three days ago. That's why I haven't come sooner."

"Rosa and Christophe were convinced that you'd abandoned us, that you didn't care anymore. I told everyone it wasn't true, but when you never came..."

"I'm here now," she sighed. Her eyes found Rosa in the little group and narrowed in her direction. "Looks like you've been taking care of everyone for me. Thanks, kid."

Bren shrugged, but grinned. "Don't worry about it." Eve gave him a small smile and he left her side to go talk to some of the soldiers behind her. She headed for Mina and Alois next. Mina threw one arm around her in a hug, then quickly handed over the screaming baby in her arms.

"He's a handful!" Mina exclaimed. "I swear, if he's not sleeping or eating, then he's crying or laughing. There's no in-between with that one." Eve bounced the boy in her arms and he quickly settled down, staring up at her with his huge gray eyes. The small patch of soft brown hair had already grown into half of a dozen tiny curls. She kissed his forehead. "We've missed you."

"I'm sorry for being away for so long," Eve muttered. "How has everyone been? I know things can't have been easy..."

"We're all okay, I think," Alois said with a light shrug. "Doc hasn't taken things well, but he's getting better. He just seems lost without Susanne. Bren and Stephan were pretty torn up about Lacey at first, but I told them they had to grow up and become men. They are going off to become soldiers soon, after all. That seemed to work. Bren started doing the things you used to do- making sure everyone had food and building people fires and just generally helping out wherever he could. Stephan just sat and talked to people, helping a lot of them through their grief. Janette's mom and Karen's dad are out there working now, in part thanks to him. So Bren has become you and Stephan has become Lacey. Too bad they leave in the spring."

Taking a few long seconds, she gazed over each of her people. Some had obvious signs of displeasure at her arrival: their eyes were narrowed, lips pursed, arms crossed over their chests or hands on their hips. They must have thought she'd abandoned them, like Rosa did. Others appeared to be relieved by her return. They had expressions of relief: tears in their eyes, grasping to their loved ones, and whispers of "Thank goodness she's back". It was as if she were their true savior back from a long expedition of a trial of faith. She could have laughed at that notion, but it was when she looked at Doc that the joking fell away. He looked miserable. His clothes were disheveled and wrinkled, the small tuft of white hair on the top of his head was uncombed, and he was unshaven. With slumped shoulders and a bowed spine, he hovered over his cane as if he might fall should he let go of it for a single second. However, there was a small amount of pride in his steady gaze, as if he had known she could protect them- no matter what. It was hard to gaze over at him, knowing she'd failed him. Their gazes provided a sense of mock security and nothing else. Lowering her hard, pained gaze to the sparse grass at her feet, she felt the angry and bitter sting of rejection from those that were displeased with her. She felt as if she'd betrayed Doc more than she had anyone else. She glanced back up at him when she heard shuffling, and watched as he turned and limped away, relying heavily on the cane at his side. They were just waiting for her to say something, but she couldn't think of any explanation.

"I'm glad everyone is okay, at least," Eve said, her frown back in its place. "I don't know how to tell you this, Alois..." She was all too aware of the people behind the one she was addressing. They were all staring at her.

"What is it?" Mina asked. Eve looked down at the baby in her arms and gave his reaching hand her finger. He grabbed onto it with surprising strength and wiggled it around.

"They've told me you want to join the Survey Corps as well. Is that still what you want?" Alois nodded once, but Mina frowned and grasped at his arm that had slipped from her shoulders. "We are conditional members. We have to prove our usefulness or they will kick us all out."

He cocked his head to the side. "What… What do you mean?"

She bit her lip as she looked back up at his confused expression. She could see the others behind him, worry etched into every face. "I mean..." Eve took a deep breath. It was hard to admit this to them. Harder than she'd imagined it would be. "They will make everyone leave. We will be forced back out on the other side of the Wall."

Alois' mouth fell open, his eyes growing as wide as they could. As understanding seemed to sink in through the shock, his mouth closed and his lips pressed into a hard line. His blue eyes darkened and narrowed while his hands clenched into tight fists. "Why?" The single word was harsh and angry, filled with confusion and even a tinge of sadness.

"That is what I was told the bargain would be." Eve was still frowning. She hated to tell him this, hated that look of betrayal on Mina's face, and worse, in her teary eyes. "I wasn't given a choice, and you won't be either. The boys, I think, won't have that burden to bear; but it is ours."

"After everything we went through just to get here, they are threatening to force us back out there?" Alois shouted at her, grabbing everyone's attention and making Leonardo cry. She held the baby close and tried to soothe him, but she was doing a poor job of it. The sharp, high-pitched wails drove into her brain like a stake. She bounced him lightly in her arms, "shh"ing him and cooing. It did no good. Mina seemed to snap out of her shock and opened her arms. Eve did not give her the baby.

"That's not fair!"

"How can they do that to us?"

"You can't let that happen!"

"We can't survive out there!"

Eve cringed against the many protests. "There's nothing I can do about it!" She was holding tight to Leonardo, hiding her face from the others. They were still angry, but their yelling subsided. Leo was still screaming at the top of his lungs, protesting the noise from earlier and probably, Eve knew, the way she was holding him.

"Let Mina take him, Eve," Rosa commanded, her voice coming from over Eve's shoulder and startling her. "We have a few things to discuss." Eve found it ironic how every other time she was near the infant, people were forcing him on her, but now that she wanted to hold him and calm him down on her own, he was being taken away. Mina slipped her arms around the baby and pulled him gently to her chest. Eve watched as she slipped through the crowd and headed to a small house on the edge of the little grouping. When she vanished inside, the wails could no longer be heard.

"What, Rosa?" Eve snapped, rounding on the older woman.

"Christophe told me about what you said to Hans." Eve glanced over at the tall blond and sighed. She had expected that. What she didn't expect, however, was Rosa's hand reaching out and striking her cheek. Her head turned to the side from the force. In mild shock, one of her hands came up to touch the stinging skin as she looked back over the one who'd hit her. "You're a bitch, you know that?"

Eve didn't respond right away. She just stared at her as the furious redhead's pale skin first tinted light pink, then darkened into red, the color creeping up her neck and ears. Christophe couldn't meet her eyes, and Alois was just as angry as Rosa, even if his only tell was the way he clenched and relaxed his fists in quick succession. Otho was lingering a few steps behind the others, but he was clearly waiting for an explanation as well. He was the only one that eyed her with a sort of dispassionate regard, as if she were just another piece of furniture from his days of carpentry to be inspected before it was given away. That in itself hurt far worse than his anger, though she knew she deserved it

"Yes," Eve stated at last. "I wanted you all to reach Wall Rose and live inside it in peace. I didn't want the responsibility of taking care of everyone anymore. I was tired of it. And once you all were here, I didn't think there would be any reason for me to worry. Hans could have stepped up and been the one you all looked to. I'm tired of pretending to be strong enough to bear that responsibility." She looked out at the faces surrounding her. They all looked hurt, and she didn't blame them.

"How... how can you say that?" Alois was looking at her like she'd just told him she'd killed his dog. She sighed and ran one hand over her hair. "I looked up to you!"

"And you are better at killing Titans than I am now," Eve said gently. "I just couldn't handle being responsible for so many lives anymore. Look at all the people we've lost! Can you even count how many times I have failed? I can't. I needed someone else to take on this burden. But now Hans and Lacey are both dead and I am still responsible for keeping everyone safe, even if things are different now. And Alois, you will be responsible too- especially if I die." He frowned at her, but said nothing.

"And you think that makes everything okay?" Rosa snapped. "What about that boy Eren? Were you ever going to tell us that he can change into a Titan?" Mutters and whispers rippled through the crowd.

Eve looked down at the ground, unable to face Rosa for the moment. "I feel guilty enough about that already."

"Not from where I'm standing!" Rosa huffed and Eve looked up just as she crossed her arms over her chest. "I knew something was up when those other soldiers arrived and he no longer came to the village. Did you know before that, or was he just finally confined? I see he isn't now, but I supposed all of you _soldiers_ could always kill him if he transformed, since you're supposed be so fucking great at it."

"I didn't know until the Commander told me," Eve muttered, staring at the ground once more. She could see bits of rock and quartz shining among the packed dirt. "And I told him to stay out of our village after that. I was going to kill him..."

"But instead, you let that monster come among our people." She looked up and over at Alois. He was shaking. Whether it was from rage or sadness, Eve couldn't be sure. With him, the two emotions were usually linked to the exact same behavior. She expected him to start throwing the punches next. She would stand there and take them if he did.

"He's even here now," Rosa continued. "What the fuck, Eve? How could you _do_ this to us? You bring that monster here and you tell us that if you don't show that you're useful, then we all get kicked out? How is being here helping us?"

"We should have stayed!"

"This was a mistake."

"What was the point in coming if we're just going to be forced to leave?"

"You don't have to live with the threat of a Titan killing or devouring you and everyone you love each and every moment of every single day." Otho's voice reverberated through the ground and she could feel his tone in the soles of her feet. Her arms wrapped tightly around her middle and she squeezed her eyes shut. He was only stating the truth, his tone cold. "Eve did what she thought was best for us. Do you think we would have fared any better if we'd stayed out there?" Otho coming to her defense stung worse than Rosa's sharp tongue. The crowd did calm, but the whispers didn't stop.

"I failed all of you," Eve whispered. "I just wanted everyone to be safe."

"We _are_ safe here," Otho said gently. "It just hurts that you lied."

"This is just like what happened after Micah took you and the others to the wall," Rosa hissed. Eve snapped her head up and narrowed her eyes.

"No, it isn't." Eve dropped her arms and stood a little taller. This was ground she could stand on- she knew she wasn't like Micah. "Micah never intended to get us behind Wall Rose. He just wanted to wipe us all out!"

"You don't know that!" Rosa shouted.

"Yes I do! We never went to a gate. We never spoke to anyone on the inside. We were never seen. Micah just went up there and spoke to one person before telling us we weren't welcome! Even if I have to bear the responsibility for keeping everyone here, that's still better than Micah's suicide mission!"

"It wasn't like that!" Rosa clapped her hand over her mouth as soon as she'd spoke the words. Eve felt a small bubble of triumph well up inside of her. Rosa had just told on herself, and Eve didn't even have to work hard to make it happen. She could still remember catching them wrapped up in each other's arms just before they left for Wall Rose the first time they'd gone. Rosa had been crying. Eve hadn't had the chance to put all the pieces of their secret relationship together until several weeks after her return. She'd confronted Rosa about it, and she had begged Eve not to say anything to his widow.

"Then what was it?" Christophe asked, taking a step to the side to better confront Rosa. He stared down at her, and Eve could see the pain behind his anger. "Since you seem to know so much about his motives, why don't you share 'em with us?"

"I..." Rosa stammered.

"What's going on?" The whispers had changed their tone from anger against Eve to suspicion against Rosa.

"What are they talking about?"

"Micah wasn't trying to save us?"

Eve smirked. "What did he tell you? Did he romanticize the trip, make it seem like we were going to rescue everyone from the fear of the Titans?" Rosa was mute. The flush had faded into a translucent sheen of sweat on her pale forehead. Eve wanted to continue to taunt her about the situation, but she held herself in check. The people around her knew entirely too much about her for her to start attacking Rosa now. Her jibes could backfire.

"He only told me that he had a friend on the Wall who could help us," Rosa muttered.

"That _friend_ turned us all away," Eve shot back. "Micah led us out there to die!"

"No he didn't!" Rosa screamed, her voice breaking with the high pitch. "He knew we wouldn't be welcomed right away, but he swore… he _swore_ that we would be saved!" The four of them staring her down froze, shock apparent on each face. Christophe was the first to react, turning his back on her. Eve frowned and looked down at the ground. Alois was ready to start throwing punches, but Otho rested one big hand on his narrow shoulder to keep him rooted in place.

"Who was this friend?" Christophe asked through his teeth.

"I don't know," Rosa whispered. "I think Micah might have said his name was Nick."

"Micah is dead and gone," Otho said softly. "We are safe behind the Wall. We shouldn't argue about this any longer. Eve and Alois now have enough weight on their shoulders."

"We all have our burdens to bear," Eve said. She looked between the four of them. Alois and Christophe seemed to have calmed down some, but Rosa was still on the verge of tears. "Alois and I will have more than enough on our plates once we leave. We have to be reformed into proper soldiers, after all."

"I'm… goin' inside." Christophe did not spare any of them a single look, just retreated back towards the village, his shoulders slumped. Eve frowned after him, but did not try to follow. They all had different ways of dealing with all of the information presented in their conversation.

"Perhaps we should go and have a cup of tea," Otho suggested. He lifted his hand from Alois' shoulder and the young man bolted, headed for the little village. Eve watched him go, then turned to Rosa. Many of the villagers agreed as well, turning to leave. Those that lingered eventually turned to go after them as well. Eve felt small amounts of confidence returning as those who hated her now left. She faced Rosa.

"Now that they are gone," Eve muttered, "I want to remind you that I've kept the secret about you and Micah for _years_. What else do you know?"

Rosa lifted her chin. Her expression hardened as her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed. "I don't have to say anything else. Don't forget, Eve, I know your secrets too."

Eve barked out one harsh laugh. "As if any of that matters now! Everyone here hates me because of what I did! I risked my life and everyone else's to get us here. Now we're here and I'm still to blame for things not being as wonderfully perfect as you all believed they would be. I never made any promises! You want to tell the entire world about what I did to my father? You go right damn ahead. That bastard deserved it, and you know it."

"I wasn't talking about your father," Rosa shot back.

"Then what?" Eve bristled.

"The truth about what happened when you were coming back from Wall Rose."

Otho and Eve both froze in place. Eve paled slightly and Otho looked down at the ground. "Why bring that up now?" Otho looked back up at her, his dark eyes boring into her.

"Why not?" Rosa put on hand on her hip. "Everyone else seems to want to bring up dirty little secrets. Why don't we call Stephan over, and you can tell him what happened to his father!"

"Like you care about that boy," Eve muttered darkly. "You only ever cared about yourself. Everyone just got behind the Wall. Do you really want them all at each other's throats? I won't be here to deal with this mess you're making."

Eve, Rosa, and Otho stood staring at each other. Eve was tired. She hated this fight Rosa had started. There was no telling who else had heard them shouting at each other. Rosa was still angry, though. Her shoulders were back, fists were clenched, and eyes narrowed; she wanted a fight. Otho wasn't his typical, calm self either. They were all major players in this shit-storm. He had plenty of reason to be concerned. Unlike Eve herself, he had to stay with these people; he had to continue to live near them and work with them. If they all knew what he'd done, they'd turn him into a pariah. Eve was getting the best end of this short stick. In a just a short time, she'd be allowed to leave and go live with the rest of the Survey Corps. She didn't have to ever see these people again. It had all become too much for her to bear.

"Eve?" She looked over her shoulder at the half-dozen or so soldiers still standing in place. Armin had called her name and was trying to wave her over. She held up one finger for him to wait. With her attention back on Rosa and Otho, she sighed.

"Can we save this fight for later? I don't have time for this. Think about everyone else here- they don't need this right now. We are all finally safe from the Titans. Can't you just be happy about that for a while?" Her questions were directed at Rosa primarily, but she knew Otho had picked up on her meaning as well. She might have been leaving them again, but she hoped he'd be able to move on. There was no question to be asked and no answer to be given. Not now, and, Eve knew, not ever. She couldn't be with him. She'd known that for years. He knew it as well, but he just wasn't ready to give up yet. "We all need to move on."

Weary and tired, Eve turned her back on Rosa and Otho, making her way toward the waiting soldiers. "Is everything okay?" Armin met her before she reached the others and asked his question in a low whisper. Eve declined to answer, just brushed by him. Sasha was eyeing her with a certain look that told Eve this matter would not be dropped so easily. She only hoped she could convince them to leave it alone.

*"You must be Eve Marks." Eve's eyes fell upon the newcomers to the group. The one who'd spoken to her was only a little taller than she herself, but she was built with more curves and plenty of muscle to go along with them. Eve found her hair style interesting. The right side of her head was shaven down, but the rest was braided down her back. Eve did not miss that Jean was by her side. They weren't touching, but the tanned woman was closer to him than she'd seen anyone else get. Her eyes were narrowed just slightly, calculating and serious. "Mercedes Carello."

Eve accepted the hand she held out. Her grip was firmer than Eve expected, but she didn't back down. "You must be the one in charge of keeping my people safe." The young woman nodded. "Thank you. I appreciate it."

"It's not a problem," she replied. A tall, dark, stocky boy approached from one side and Eve glanced over at him. He shrank back a little, eyes lowering to the ground. "That's Oliver Ungabwe. The four of us make up one of the Elite Squads in the Garrison."

"Elite?" Eve questioned. "Why 'elite' soldiers?" She took a deep breath and huffed. "Not that I'm ungrateful, I just didn't expect it. After all, those Wallist people aren't soldiers, are they? I just assumed the purpose of the soldiers was to deter their efforts. I didn't think there would be any threat of physical harm…"

"Think of us as a precaution," Mercedes replied. "We don't know what those cultists might do, so we like to be prepared for anything."

"I understand that you have to inform your superiors of any incidents, but can you make sure that word gets to me, as well? I may be on my way to becoming a soldier, but my loyalties lie with my people first."

"Yes, of course," Mercedes' said, nodding.

"Thanks." Eve relaxed, some of her tension fading.

"Commander Erwin says you all have a timeline you need to stick to," Mercedes said. "Some of your people didn't look too happy earlier. Not to be rude, but I suggest you take care of things quickly." Eve nodded once and turned on her heel. She had to get her things and find Alois. Maybe there was a way to smooth things over with him before they left. They had a lot to learn, and she was going to need at least one person on her side during all of this. She didn't have the patience or the time to deal with the other people in her village at the moment.

She jogged down the dirt path that split from the main road and headed for the house she'd seen Mina disappear into earlier. There were several dozen little houses, all very similar in build and color. Thatched roofs and simple wooden frames. The houses in her village had been made of stone. Those seemed so much safer compared to these, but then again, there was less danger here. Eve stopped short at the door. A painful stabbing sensation in her left side made her grab at the area and take a deep breath. She lifted one hand, but felt awkward knocking on the door. In her own village, she'd often just walked right in to Alois' and Mina's house. Things were different here, and the realization of just how different they were had begun to sink in.

"Mina?" Eve called. The door was wrenched open. Alois appeared, his face contorted in anger as he forced Eve backwards by shoving a thick canvas bag at her chest. Eve caught the dark gray bag in her arms and took a few steps back. He forced her back a few more steps, then shut the door behind himself. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I want to know what happened with Micah," Alois hissed, hovering over Eve. She shook her head. "Why not?"

"Not here, not now," she whispered. "Everyone here is on edge- I know that. They don't need this right now, and _you_ know that! Let's just go to headquarters and we can talk about this later."

"Only if you swear to me right here and now that you will explain everything you know before the night is over." Alois wasn't going to let Eve out of this situation, and she knew his tenacity all too well. She sighed and nodded once before he backed down a little. "Say it."

"I swear I will tell you everything I know," Eve whispered. "We don't have much time left. You should say goodbye to Mina. I want to see Leonardo again before we have to leave." Alois nodded and turned around to open the door. She brushed by him in the small kitchen. It was much darker inside, even with all of the drapes over the windows open and a cheery fire leaping in the large stone fireplace. Eve could look through the center of the fire into the other room. Mina was sitting in a rocking chair, humming a little tune to Leonardo. She followed Alois around the little square table, after leaving her bag resting on its top, and through the bare threshold into the sitting room.

Mina looked up at them, but she did not smile. Alois made some gesture and she stood up. Eve moved closer to her and Mina surrendered the infant bundled in his dark blue blanket. Eve took a few more steps to reach the rocking chair and sat with the boy, never taking her eyes off of him. She heard Alois and Mina move across the floor and glanced up for a second as they closed a door behind themselves. He yawned up at her. She couldn't help but give him a small smile. "Your mommy loved you very much, Leo," she whispered. "I know you won't remember her, but I want you to know that. You probably won't remember me, either."

The sad truth of her words sank in her chest like a rock. For the first time in a long time, tears welled in her eyes and she let them come without fighting. The baby in her arms had already grown in the few weeks she'd been apart from him. She wondered how big he would be the next time she got to see him. Annalise would have been so angry with her for giving him to Mina to raise. Annalise would have expected her to stay in the village with the others and become the boy's mother. But, Eve thought, she was doing what was best for him in the long run. She was going to become a soldier to prove her usefulness so that everyone could remain in the village. Alois was going to help, but she knew that it was going to be her maps that got them to Shingashina that would close the deal. She hoped that once the Wall was closed up, she and her people would be allowed to live forever behind Wall Rose in peace.

Eve was under no illusions about the remainder of her short life. She would consider herself lucky if she wound up maimed and alive to spend her remaining life with Leonardo rather than dead and in the belly of some Titan. She'd kept her promise to Annalise so far, though. She'd made sure that Leonardo was behind the Wall and safe. Her tears rolled over her cheeks, and a few of them fell on the blanket Leo was wrapped in. She reached up with one hand to brush them away. The infant blinked up at her with an adorable tiny frown and his little brown eyebrows all pinched together. She laughed. "Don't give me that look, little lion," she whispered, stroking his round cheek with one finger. He yawned again and his eyes drooped shut. "Sleep, little lion. Make sure you grow up big and strong like your dad." She looked around the room and found the small crib pushed up against the wall just a couple of steps from the chair she sat in. Standing, she moved toward it and lowered him gently to the thin mattress. She left him bundled up.

When she turned, Alois was stalking through the end of the room, heading straight for the kitchen, and then, she imagined, outside. He had a plain bag similar to her own, but green instead, over his shoulder. She sighed and could hear Mina's soft sobs from the room Alois had come from. She slipped outside after Alois, grabbing her bag from the table on the way. "You ready?" he grunted, eyeing her over his shoulder. She nodded once and they set off down the dirt path. She noticed curtains moving so people could stare, and people stopping what they were doing to follow her with their eyes. Things weren't ever going to be the same between her and the people in her village. She could accept that, but the problem was everyone else accepting it.

Eve found Osten waiting for her between Armin's and Sasha's horses. She secured her bag on her back, then stroked his nose. His dark brown eyes peered up at him, and it was almost as if he understood her pain. Climbing up in the saddle, she spotted Otho not too far away. He said nothing and did not move, but she understood. She'd hurt him today, as well, and he wasn't going to forgive her for that anytime soon. With a frown, she turned from him. Erwin was back at the front of the group just as Alois joined with his own horse, Ira, from their village. The group set out, leaving the Elite Squad from the Garrison as the only ones on the road watching them go.

The weight of responsibility felt cemented into place on her shoulders. The sting from Rosa's slap lingered on her cheek and spread down into her chest. Her people were disappointed in her. She'd done what she thought was the best thing for them, but she'd been wrong. It only drove home the reality that she was never meant to lead them. Alois was angry, too. She had no more allies, no more friends, no one she could trust.

* * *

**A/N:** Please, let me know what you think!

And thanks again to MercedesCarello\- this wouldn't be as good without all of your help!


	5. Sacrifices

Chapter Five: Sacrifices

* * *

**A/N:** This one is a tad short, so I'm sorry for that. Overall, I don't think I'm fully satisfied with this chapter. However, the longer I spend on it, the angrier I will get. If that happens, I'll never move on! (hence the chapter title- no one ever said they had to go with the story...)

* * *

It was dark when they reached headquarters. The ancient castle was nestled in a clearing towards the back of a pocket of woods. Eve, clutching her side in pain as she fought desperately to stay in Osten's saddle, couldn't have been more relieved at the sight. The group slowed as they came closer to the castle. Soldiers were milling about the yard, but nearly all of them stopped to stare. She tried to sit up a little straighter in the saddle, but the long ride had exhausted her physically while the conversation with Rosa and her people left her emotionally drained. Alois hadn't spoken to her during the entire ride, but she knew that was soon to change. They all rode around to the back of the castle where the stables were located. Eve nearly fell out off of Osten while dismounting, but Reiner had lent her a friendly arm of support. She nodded her thanks at him, then set about unbuckling the saddle.

Nearly an hour later, she was finished fussing over Osten. She'd brushed him down and covered him with a thin blanket. She'd been avoiding Alois at every turn, but he had yet to force her to speak to him. Sasha was the one who came to drag her away from the stables and lead her towards the main hall in the castle that had been set up as a mess hall. There were maybe a dozen long wooden tables, with half stacked end-to-end in two parallel rows. Eve allowed Sasha to drag her over the cold stone floor. She flopped down in one of the chairs as the overly-cheery girl bounced away.

Eve folded her arms and rested her head in the crook of one. Her entire body tensed and relaxed with the force of her yawn. She was aware of the chair to her left scraping over the stones and someone sitting down, but she did not look up to see who it was or offer any words by way of greeting. When no one spoke, Eve assumed it was either Armin or Alois. It was only when she heard Sasha's little hum of delight and the sound of a dish being set before her did Eve move her head.

"We've got roasted carrots, a steamed potato, and rice!" Sasha declared cheerfully as she sat down to Eve's right. "Have you eaten yet?" Eve glanced to her right over at Armin.

He nodded to Sasha before his eyes found Eve's for just the split second she allowed him. She was quick to turn her attention to the food in front of her. She could see the curiosity and accusation in those baby blues and she didn't want to deal with any of that at the moment. "Alois seems upset."

Eve ignored the statement and looked over at Sasha, wracking her brain for anything at all to say. "Armin said something about your nickname being 'potato girl'. What's that all about?" Sasha flushed dark red around her neck and Eve found herself smiling just a little as it crept up into her cheeks.

"The first day of training, I stole a potato and ate it during the Commander's initiation speech," Sasha muttered. She stabbed the potato on her plate violently with her fork. "He said I couldn't eat for the rest of the day and I had to run until I passed out."

"You've never been the sharpest tool in the shed." Eve looked up from the carrot she just finished chopping into pieces. Jean scraped the chair across from Armin back and sat down to join them. "I heard about you stealing that whole cut of meat from the Officer's supply, too."

Sasha's mouth began to water, but then she frowned. "I didn't even get a little piece of that."

"Get caught again?" Eve asked, a light smirk on her face. She popped a piece of the carrot into her mouth.

Sasha shook her head. "That was the day the Colossus Titan showed back up. Everything went crazy, and in the chaos, the box I'd hid the meat in was destroyed." Eve found it mildly amusing that Sasha seemed more upset by the loss of the slab of meat more than she was upset about the Colossus Titan's reappearance. Sasha shrugged and took a large bite of her rice. "I wish it wasn't illegal for us to hunt inside the Walls."

"Meat is too rare," Armin said softly, "and the royals behind Wall Sheena need it more than we do." It did not surprise her to hear the bitterness in his voice when he spoke. He looked over at Eve. "Did you and your people always eat as much meat as we had when we were there?"

Eve had to nod, but she added a light shrug. "Rosa, Klaus, Josef, Pepin, Hans... They all used to hunt for the village. We grew some crops, but not enough to sustain us all. The apples were always a huge part of our diet, but we relied on meat more than anything, I think. Winter was always the hardest..."

"I never saw a granary or silo out there," Jean remarked, leaning back in his chair. "Whe]re did you keep all of your food?"

"Below the barn," Eve answered. "Everything was kept down there, or under the houses in the village. They all had reinforced cellars. It was one of the first things we worked on after Wall Maria fell. We had to have a relatively safe place to escape to if the Titans managed to get through to the village."

"Did that ever happen?" Sasha asked.

"Yeah," Eve sighed. "Twice. Even with the precautions, we lost a lot of people both times."

"I want to know why the Titans were so active at night out there," Armin muttered. "That doesn't make any sense to me. How long was it like that?"

"A few months before you all found me," Eve said with a shrug. "We were devastated the first time we saw one lumbering towards us so late, but we adjusted. We didn't have any choice." As the words flowed from her mouth, she wanted to cringe. She couldn't say that anymore. They'd always had a choice. And when she'd finally forced that alternative onto all of her people, she'd figured out that it was the wrong choice. She had to live with the consequences of her actions now. There had already been so much blood on her hands.

"… crazy that they can be active so late. What happened to them needing sunlight to work or whatever?" Jean asked. Eve tuned back into the conversation.

"That was just one theory," Armin pointed out. "We don't know anything about the Titans for sure except for how to kill them. Even with all of Hange's experiments on the Titans we've captured and Eren, we still don't have any solid answers."

"And don't forget the Walls themselves," Sasha muttered, poking at the carrot on her plate.

"What about the Walls?" Eve asked, eyebrows furrowing. Sasha, Armin, and Jean all suddenly found the glossy, finished surface of the table extremely interesting. She frowned at them, but shoveled in another mouthful of rice. Despite the conversation and whatever was eating her newfound companions, she was still hungry. She knew that she needed to eat for tomorrow when her work to become a soldier would begin. She swallowed. "What is it?"

"The Walls are made out of Titans."

Eve was suddenly very glad she hadn't taken another bite yet. She would have spit her food all over Armin. Her jaw grew slack and her eyes wide. Chill bumps rose all over her arms and the tiny hairs on the back of her neck stood straight up. "What?"

"The Walls are all made out of other Colossus Titans," Jean spat angrily. "They told you about the Female Titan, right? Well when she went on her rampage in Stohess, she broke a piece of the Wall. There was a huge hole. We could see part of a Titan's face."

"They were all alive," Armin continued. "So obviously, sunlight must have at least something to do with their movements. Pastor Nick was screaming to get it covered up so that the sunlight wouldn't touch it." Armin had flowed seamlessly back into their previous conversation, but Eve was still stuck on how the Walls that were supposed to protect all of humankind were made out of the very thing that was their greatest threat.

Memories flowed into her mind of a time just after the Walls fell. She was still young and ignorant at that time. There was a large group of them, all trying to get the hang of using the three-dimensional maneuvering gear. Micah had come over to her when he saw her get the hang of it early-on. He'd laughed and said that her ability with the gear was ironic. When she'd asked what he meant, he'd tried to explain the concept of irony to her. Until this very moment, that concept had continued to elude her with its true meaning. Now, she felt she understood perfectly what irony was.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Eve asked with a light chuckle. Armin, Jean, and Sasha all looked back over at her, frowning. She laughed again. "People risk their lives to defend a Wall that's made from the very thing they are defending it from? What the fuck kind of bullshit is that? You said 'Pastor Nick', right?" She eyed Armin and he nodded once. "Let me guess- he's the leader of that Wallist cult of ass holes that want to kick my people out, isn't he?" Again, Armin nodded. "And you people think all of this is just okay?"

"No one thinks that," Jean countered. "We were pissed at first too, believe me. Hange almost killed him because he wouldn't talk about what he knew about the Walls and the connection they had to the Titans. And those guys are protected by the monarchy. We can't go against them. No one can."

Eve let out another harsh laugh. "Of course someone can! What about the Military Police or the monarchy that controls them? If the monarchy decided one day that it wanted everyone to know the fucking truth about what was going on around here, then we'd know by now! Or, at least you all would. I wonder how my people will discover _that _secret. I can hear them cursing me for it already..." She could picture Rosa fuming and hear her angry words being screeched out in the terrible high-pitched tone she only used when she was furious. Alois would probably hit her. Even Otho wouldn't remain calm or come to her defense on that note. She'd essentially just brought them all so much closer to hell itself.

"What secret?" She snapped her head over her left shoulder, her braid whipping around and smacking her. Alois was standing a small distance from Armin's chair, glaring at her.

"The Walls are made out of Titans," Jean clipped. Alois' reaction was similar to Eve's- a slack-jawed wide-eyed stare for a few moments. Then his fists began to clench and release in rapid succession once more. Eve turned her attention back to the food in front of her and began to shovel as much as she could in her mouth. "We found out two years ago. There was a Female Titan that transformed like Eren can. She was in Stohess District. She broke a piece of the Wall, and we saw it."

Hearing the story a second time did not make it any easier to stomach. Eve's belly was swollen with the food she'd just eaten, yet there were still a few bites of rice left on her plate, along with almost her entire potato. She'd only scooped out one small bite. She looked over at Sasha and found her plate empty before shoving the remainder of her own food at the brunette.

"You should eat it!" Sasha protested, pushing the plate back to her.

Eve sighed and sat back a little, pointing to her belly. "I can't. I'm already too full as it is." Sasha frowned, but didn't try to shove the food away a second time. "You eat it if you want it. No sense in it going to waste." Eve couldn't have eaten anything more even if she was still hungry. She felt nauseous now that her newfound knowledge was really beginning to sink in. Sasha began to munch on the potato after a moment of what looked like some intense deliberation on her part. Eve slid her chair back and stood up.

"What's wrong?" Armin asked, looking up at her.

"Nothing," she sighed. That was a lie, but she didn't want him to fuss over her. "Alois and I need to speak privately."

"I'd go out by the chicken coop," Jean suggested. "Not too many people still awake this late, and it's far enough away that you shouldn't be overheard." Eve nodded her thanks and looked up at Alois. His blue eyes were burning with unasked questions and a bitter anger directed all at her. She sighed again and turned on her heel to head back outside into the freezing night air. Alois was hot on her heels.

They made their way across the grounds without interference. She thought they might be stopped and questioned as to their motives, but no one bothered with them beyond staring for a moment. Eve led the way across the dark, grassy field to where the make-shift chicken coop had been sloppily built and sloppily reinforced. Alois followed her step-for-step. She smiled just slightly. It was strange that he'd become so much like her in the last few years. He was already nineteen. She and Christophe had started working with him the day he turned thirteen. Six long years. Aldrich and Micah had been alive back then, too. So many more of their people had been alive back then. Alois hadn't been her student alone. He was the product of training from several different sources, all equally gifted in their respectful areas.

Eve had been best with the gear. That much was obvious from day one. Christophe was good with teaching someone how to use the gear. Aldrich had been the one to go to for swordplay, but Micah had been the center for knowledge on how to actually engage a Titan and stay alive. Alois had quickly become the best Titan-killer in the village. At just fifteen, he was slaying Titans with the ease of a seasoned Survey Corps veteran. There was a feeling of irony tickling the back of her mind once more. She came to a stop once she reached the shadows of the coop, the crescent moon providing enough light, at least, for shadows. Alois stopped less than a meter away.

"Tell me about Micah."

Eve nodded once. "He and Rosa were having an affair. I caught them just before we all left to go to the Wall. I didn't know what he'd told her, so I said nothing to her. On the way to the Wall, Micah was talking about who would take over if he died. I was volunteered, but Micah said he'd taken care of it. I didn't know that he'd meant Hans. We didn't see very many Titans on the way. It took us three days to get there. When the Wall came into view, I asked if we were headed for one of the outlying districts, but Micah said no, that we would be shot down. So we followed him to some obscure place on the Wall and we waited. He was up there with a single other person for a few hours. Then he came back down, and all he said was that we'd been turned away.

"Everyone was furious. We all demanded answers, but Micah gave none. He just rode ahead, leaving us all behind as we screamed after him. It caused a fight among us. Micah had some very loyal friends, and they decided to trust him implicitly. Those of us that did not have that sort of faith in him tried to make him stop. We were so stupid... Out there, we had nothing for cover or protection. Titans came for us all at once, but we didn't try to fight, we just ran.

"Micah was caught by one of the Titans. Several of us engaged our gear to try to stop it, but Micah just told us to run. I can't forget the look on his face... He was smiling, laughing even, as the Titan bit his legs off. We all thought he was insane at that point. Those who trusted him began to doubt. I was in the lead as we ran from the Titans. Everyone just followed me to the woods. We stayed there until nightfall, then we slipped away from the Titans and went just a short distance away.

"When we woke up, we were surrounded again. A few people panicked and they fell out of their trees. I was the one to make the call to use their deaths as a distraction. Stephan's father was one of those men. The rest of us ran for our lives. We were chased all day long. One by one, people were being picked off by Titans. I couldn't do anything to help them. People were screaming for me to stop, to fight, but I just kept riding. If they couldn't keep up, they were eaten. I made that call, Alois. I am the reason so few of us made it back alive."

"You... didn't have... any choice," he muttered, halting and jerking in his speech. "Micah never told you anything about who he'd spoken to or what he did up there?" Eve shook her head. "Then how do you know that he was leading you all on a suicide mission?"

Eve raised one eyebrow at him, but said nothing. Understanding registered in his eyes and he lowered his head a little. He'd answered his own question. "How can you not call that trip a suicide mission?"

"But what makes you so sure that he was just trying to wipe all of us out?"

"I made the journey back towards the Wall myself. I made it to Trost district in just over a day. Honestly, Alois, why wouldn't we have gone to the gate? They wouldn't have shot us! Not then… Not before they knew about what Eren could do. We were _people_ for fuck's sake! And then he goes up alone to talk to one single person… How many people did you have to talk to when you first got here?" She paused just long enough for Alois to consider the question. "We should have all gone up and had a huge meeting with many people involved. Rosa said that Micah's friend's name was Nick. The leader of the cult that wants us gone is named Nick. I doubt that's a coincidence."

"But you don't have any real proof that Micah wanted us all dead," Alois insisted. "You keep telling the same story over and over, but the facts never change. Micah did speak to someone on that Wall. He died. Most of the group died. Titans did that, Eve, not him!"

"No, I did." Eve was bitter. She looked down at the ground and wrapped her arms around herself in a poor attempt to warm herself. "I led them to their deaths. I didn't stop. I didn't fight. I was scared. They died because of me."

Alois huffed but didn't try to argue with her. "You still haven't given me any real evidence against Micah. I refuse to think of him as some horrible person the way you do." With that, Alois turned on his heel and headed back towards the castle. Eve sighed.

He was right, but she was still holding back. She couldn't tell Alois what she'd heard him screaming in his final moments. The potential damage to Alois that would cause made her cringe. The memory flowed into her mind. Just as he was being eaten, laughing like a mad man, he'd shouted out, "At last! My true form!" She hadn't understood it then. Honestly, she still didn't quite grasp his true meaning. But there was the possibility that Micah had known people could change into Titans. If he had, everything would make sense. Then again, nothing made much sense anymore.

With a small amount of reluctance, she headed back to the castle. Moving slowly, she studied the grass below her feet. It was long; despite the coming winter, it had yet to begin to die. The vitality of the grass irked her for no real reason. The sound of footsteps crunching over the blades made her look up. Her favorite person in the entire world was glaring at her from a short distance away. She returned the hateful stare. Levi was still out of uniform. The black cloak made him appear more sinister, somehow, but she didn't think of him as her enemy. He was merely another obstacle for her to overcome.

"Just keep in mind that you chose to be here," he stated, his tone condescending. His eyes told a different story, but Eve was struggling with the meaning behind the almost sad look.

"That sounds like a threat," she clipped. Her eyes narrowed as she studied his expression. One brow lifted by a hair. If the sliver of light made available by the moon hadn't been shining directly on his face, she doubted she would have seen it.

"That depends on you," he remarked. Eve relaxed, a small smirk forming as she closed her eyes. "I don't think you have what it takes."

"We'll see." She looked back up at him, but she was too tired to keep up the big-and-tough game.

"You should get some rest," he muttered, turning his back to her. "You'll need it." She sighed as he stalked away. His limp was less noticeable now, but she could detect the slight unevenness in is gait. With wandering thoughts of how he was injured, Titan-shifters, and the accusations of her people, she made her way back inside. Sasha was still waiting for her.

Eve was swaying on her feet as she followed after her new roommate up the stairs. Their quarters were in another section of the castle, but Sasha had said something about the way they were going being the fastest way to get there. Eve couldn't focus on what she was saying as she said it, she only absorbed the words several seconds after they were spoken. The trip was long, she knew that, but she had no concept of where she was or where she'd come from. Without a doubt, she'd be lost if Sasha wasn't there to show her the way in the morning.

She noticed few details about her new room. She knew there were two sets of bunk beds. Sasha pointed her towards the top bunk on the right side of the room. Eve climbed up the little ladder and sat before tugging the strap of her gray bag over her head. Grasping fingers found the first thing she could to sleep in, then her uniform came off in uneven pieces. First her left boot, then her jacket, followed by the white button-down shirt. Her right boot was next, then her socks, and finally her pants. She tugged the light gray night shirt over her head that she was positive had once been white. Folding up the random pieces of her uniform, she left everything at the foot of her bed rather than climbing down to put it wherever it was supposed to go. She curled up on her right in the bed, pulling the blankets over herself up to her neck. Her eyes were closed. She slipped off into the realm of sleep before she was even aware that she was dreaming.

* * *

**A/N:** Let me know what you think. :)


	6. Shift

Chapter Six: Shift

* * *

**A/N**: Sorry for the delay!

* * *

She was falling behind again. Cursing under her labored breath, she tried to push herself just a little harder, tried to run just a little faster. Armin's back continued getting farther and farther away. The physical training each morning had proven to her, in more than one way, that she was no soldier and she never would be. She lacked the strength and stamina to keep up with the others.

"You're falling behind again." Levi's cold tone came up from behind her and she rolled her eyes. He jogged beside her as if it were nothing more strenuous than a nice stroll on a warm afternoon. She hated him.

"Fuck you," she spat. Her hand was clutching the shooting pain in her left side as she continued her attempted to keep running after the others. "I was in a coma for three weeks."

"Don't give me your lame excuses," he spat. "You wanted to play soldier, now you have to own the part."

She wanted to make some snappy comeback, but she had to focus more on keeping her legs moving, despite how exhausted she already was. Alois hadn't spoken to her in days. Sasha was weirdly enjoyable to be around, but she wasn't always up for company of any sort. How she found any sense of peace in the madness that was the Survey Corps was impossible for Eve to understand. She wish she knew where to go to get away from people, but so far, she'd always been found within ten minutes. Connie could make her laugh with his stupid antics, and the fights between Jean and Eren were always a nice source of entertainment- especially once they started throwing punches. Krista was peaceful to be near, but she seemed fake to Eve, like she wasn't even a real person.

Her days of hell had begun at dawn after her first night in the castle-turned-headquarters. Sasha woke her bright and early for laundry, then they began the daily morning torture she was currently experiencing. It started with some light stretches, then evolved into more strenuous exercises, and ended with the five-kilometer run. She hadn't even made it half way through the first morning. As it was now, she doubted she could finish today, but each day she'd improved just a little along. After the run, it would be time for breakfast and then her next level of hell would begin: Bertolt was teaching her to use the rifle. She'd practice with him for a while, and then she'd go eat lunch. After lunch it was time for hand-to-hand combat with Reiner and Jean. She'd learned that Eren was supposedly the best in this area, but she wanted nothing to do with him in any shape or form. After she was thoroughly bruised and beaten, she'd spend the remainder of the afternoon with Peter, the secondary field medic, learning basic first aid (and, as he'd added with a wink, a few things extra).

Eve kept running, determined to at least finish the five kilometers today. She didn't care if she was several minutes behind the others. Finishing today would mean achieving the goal she'd set for herself. After a week of the same thing, she thought she'd be better by now. She could see the others ahead of her, most of them slowing to a walk as they finished their final lap. She was almost there... Armin had just finished, but she still had another quarter of a kilometer to go. Levi was still at her side, but if he'd been taunting her, she hadn't heard. She tuned out everything else to focus on the tree that marked her finish line.

_Just a little farther_, she kept telling herself. It became a sort of mantra, and she repeated it every few seconds. At last, she made it to the tree, and she almost laughed with a small bubble of triumph. It had become painfully obvious to her that she could not keep up with the others physically. Even Armin, who was supposedly the weakest of them, could at least make the run- and do it without looking as if he would collapse afterward. Eve slowed to a walk and stayed on her feet, but bent over with her hands just above her knees, panting.

"Look at that," Levi remarked, "you actually finished this time. Too bad you still took a full three minutes longer than everyone else." She didn't have any energy left to tell Levi off, so she ignored him. "Now if only you could learn to shoot and fight, you'd at least make a sorry excuse for a soldier rather than only pretending to be one." She bit down on the inside of her cheek, trying very hard to keep her thoughts to herself.

"Are you okay?" Armin asked, approaching her with a canteen. She nodded and stood up straight, getting her breathing and heart rate under control. He passed her the canteen and she accepted it with a nod of thanks. Despite her thoughts about him spying on her and reporting to Erwin about everything she said or did, she had slowly grown close to him once more. He was often there with her when she was learning how to take apart and reassemble the rifle she detested. He'd given her a few pointers and helped her remember where all the pieces went. "Well come on, let's go find Bertolt. I think we are doing moving targets today." Eve groaned a little, but nodded and passed the canteen back to him, wiping her mouth with the sleeve of her dark blue long-sleeved shirt. Since the uniform they'd given her didn't exactly fit well, she'd taken to wearing her own shirts she'd brought from the village. She needed a belt to keep the white pants up, but that was enough. The jacket was still too big, but she doubted they were made any smaller.

"Moving targets?" Levi asked, a biting sarcasm in his tone. "I didn't think she could even hit still targets yet."

"I nailed every single one yesterday," she snapped. "Not perfect, but at least I hit them. You all had what, three years to learn this crap? Cut me some slack."

"I did it in a week," Levi remarked, staring down at her as if she was lower than the ground he stood on. Her fist balled up, but she kept it by her side. The temptation to slug him one good time in the jaw was almost painful to resist. She rolled her eyes instead and began to stomp away, off to the temporary and shabby range they'd set up for her and Alois' benefit.

"You are getting a lot better," Armin said, trying to encourage her. She sighed and slowed her pace until he caught up.

"I'm not cut out for this, Armin. I'm not a soldier. You all can teach me how to be one forever and it still won't sink in." She was a little annoyed by the truth she spoke. "I don't have much choice about it, but I'd rather be out on the other side of the Wall again. At least I know I can kill Titans."

"You still haven't recovered from your coma," Armin argued. "Just because you could before doesn't mean it will come so easily to you now. I know you lost a lot of muscle tone... You know that, too. Gaining all of that back won't happen in just a week- maybe not even a month."

"Don't remind me," Eve sighed. They had reached the little picnic table where Bertolt was usually already waiting with her rifle. He hadn't arrived just yet, though, and she sat on the top of the table, facing Armin. "No matter what, though, I have to prove I can be useful. I have to at least pretend to be a soldier. If my people are turned away, forced out of Wall Rose, they will probably all kill me for dragging them out here in the first place."

"Alois is learning fast," Armin said with a shrug. "I know you haven't spoken to him, but he's really catching on to everything- except first aid. He has the basics, but I wouldn't trust him to stitch anything up."

Eve chuckled and looked up at the deep blue sky; huge, white puffy clouds were floating lazily by on the late autumn wind. "He hates me already," she sighed. "But I can't really blame him for that. It's my fault that he has to shoulder some of the responsibility for our village."

"No, it isn't," Armin said quietly. She ignored his words and closed her eyes, enjoying the rays of the sun beating down her. The sun vanished behind a cloud and she opened her eyes once more, looking back out toward the castle to see if she could spot Bertolt. He was carrying the long rifle over his shoulder and gave a friendly wave over to them. "You need to talk to Alois."

Armin's words went without response, but she had the feeling that he'd known that was coming. She returned Bertolt's wave, but did not get up. She'd wait until he was closer. If Armin hadn't been there since the second morning, she'd have gotten away with persuading Bertolt to just pretend they were working with the rifle. She'd managed that easily enough less than a half an hour into her first lesson. He had a flimsy personality- no will of his own. Whatever anyone suggested, he would just jump on the bandwagon and go along. She could see in him a certain sadness when they fell quiet, but she never asked about it. Everyone here had their demons. Her plate was full enough without trying to take care of someone else's problems.

"I know you're just trying to help," she sighed. Glancing over at him, she could detect a faint smile. "Guess I still need time to adjust to all of this. It's hard, going from being on my own and making all of the decisions to being around so many people and following orders."

"You'll get used to it," he said with an encouraging smile. She gave a light chuckle and stared out across the yard.

"I don't have much choice, do I?" she asked rhetorically.

As Bertolt got closer, she stood. Armin gave her a hard look that she blatantly ignored. They all headed closer to the make-shift range and Bertolt passed her the rifle. For the first hour, she worked with the stationary targets once more. She was hitting every target now, at the very least, and seven out of ten of the barrels had bullet holes embedded into the small black circle painted on them. The slim round circles that served as the tops and bottoms of the barrels were tied to a rope that was hung from a tree branch and Bertolt or Armin would push them hard. She found she was better at moving the moving targets than shooting the barrels.

She'd set small goals for herself. Once she'd accomplished that small goal, she'd make it a little harder on herself with the creation of a new goal. It was the only way she didn't feel worthless as even a mock soldier. It had been extremely difficult that first day, seeing just how weak she really was compared to everyone else- even Alois. She could blame her severe loss of muscle tone from the coma or she could make excuses about how she'd never bothered with running around aimlessly or doing pushups and other exercises. She knew, though, that she really was just plain weak. It didn't matter that she was faster than anyone she'd seen so far with the maneuvering gear; it didn't matter that she could kill Titans with expert ability; all that mattered was that she couldn't compare to these soldiers. If she was going to be evaluated in two weeks, she felt certain she'd fail miserably.

When she'd extinguished her supply of ammunition for the day, they wandered back over to the picnic table and she began to take the gun apart. She wasn't paying much attention to her actions, but they'd become almost muscle memory for the number of times she'd performed them. Her mind was too busy reeling about the coming examination and what exactly that might entail. How was she ever going to prove herself- especially if it meant she would be tested alongside others? Alois was now far better at everything compared to her. She was proud of him, but she was also worried for him. If she failed, then all of the responsibility would fall to him. She knew he couldn't handle that. Ever since she and the others had started working with him, teaching him to use the gear and the swords to kill Titans, she'd kept him far from anything resembling a sense of responsibility so that he could focus solely on killing Titans. Nothing else should have been important to him- other than Mina, perhaps.

Everything had begun to slip out of her control. When they were in the village, she'd had so many worries and fears for her people, but at least she'd been active in protecting them. No matter what it took to keep them safe, she'd done it. She recalled Alois reminded her of the winter she'd rode for two days straight to find blankets and other things to keep her people warm and alive. There were various other stories of that nature- some involving heading straight for the nearest larger city and almost dying four times over to break into a hospital and take every drop of medicine she could find. She'd taken on those responsibilities because no one else was willing to take the blame when something bad happened. She could handle the outrage and despair and hurtful words when they lost another person, and his or her loved ones verbally or physically attacked her. All of that she could handle. It was here, now, not having any say over the situation she'd been placed in, that she felt useless and worthless. How could she protect her people by learning to clean a gun or learning how to grapple?

"Fuck this." Eve dropped the slim piece of metal from the slide. It clattered to the table like an additional exclamation and she stood.

"E-Eve?" Armin stuttered, looking over at her in surprise. He'd been focused on something else, but she didn't care to notice what. She turned away from him and Bertolt.

"I can't do this meaningless bullshit anymore," she snapped, her head snapping over her shoulder and eyes narrowing as she stared Armin down. "I'll be back later." She jogged away- the one time she felt a true desire to actually run since the beginning of this week of hell. Getting away from everyone around her was the goal, so she headed for the stables. Osten noticed her almost immediately and began whinnying and tossing his head, as if begging her to let him out. Grabbing his saddle from the place on the wall where it hang, she opened the door keeping him. The riding blanket was draped over the door, so she grabbed that first and then layered the saddle on top of it. He kept still while she managed the buckles. He was stamping his feet impatiently as she finished readying him for their ride, and her fingers were twitching as she moved, anxious to get away before someone came to stop her.

She led him out of the stall, climbed up into his saddle, and they were off before she even dug her heels into his side. Voices called after her as she and Osten galloped through the yard. She went straight for the forest, but avoided the road. It didn't matter where she was going, as long as she got away. She didn't look at anyone, just focused on the trees. Once they were in the woods, she allowed herself a small smile. Yes, she was running away, but it was exhilarating. Osten jumped fallen branches or tree trunks and she laughed at how eager he was to run even faster. When they broke free on the other side of the small patch of woods, she let him run as fast and wherever he wanted to.

She was tempted- oh, so tempted- to just go back to her village. Alois could provide the necessary requirements for her people to stay behind the Wall. He would hate her for dumping that burden on him, but he hated her anyway. She could no longer provide for her people the way they needed her to, but he could. He'd already begun to make friends in the Corps, and she knew he'd go back to Mina and everyone else the moment he was given half of a chance. All he needed to do was stay alive. She trusted that he could manage that at least. He was better at killing Titans than she was, after all.

The sound of horse hooves pounding the ground was unmistakable, and she knew someone was following her. Cursing under her breath, she looked over her shoulder. To her great surprise, it was Levi. She grabbed Osten's reigns a tight and forced him to slow into a trot. Levi was at her side in a split second.

His fist connected with her jaw and knocked her out of Osten's saddle. She hit the ground with a grunt of pain, grabbing the right side of her face. She stared up at him, more shocked than anything. Osten had noticed the loss of his rider and had slowed, turning to look at her and wait for her summons. Levi slipped from his saddle right in front if her, then brought his foot back. She rolled out of the way of his kick and clamored to her feet, almost slipping in the slick, damp grass. She went on the defensive, bringing her arms up like Jean and Reiner had shown her. He lunged forward, and she recognized the move as one meant to knock her off of her feet. She side stepped at the last second and tried to use his momentum against him, but he was faster than she realized. He'd spun on his toes and grabbed her, tossing her to the ground as if she were a sack of potatoes.

"What the fuck is your problem?" she shouted, getting back to her feet. He lunged for her again, and she dodged again. A high kick came at her head, but she ducked and lifted her arm, forcing his leg to the side. She'd hoped he would lose his balance, but somehow, he stayed on his feet. His fist flew, connecting with her left side of badly-healed ribs. The blow forced the air out of her lungs. Clutching her side, she knelt on the ground, gasping. Her eyes saw the next kick aimed for her head and her body reacted, flattening lower and rolling to avoid it. He was relentless, and she realized he wasn't going to stop. Standing, she readied herself once more. It took two seconds for him to advance with his next fist. She shifted her upper body to the side and jabbed her own fist into his ribs, then spun on her toes with a low kick that successfully nailed the same spot. He retaliated with an uppercut to her chin, knocking her head back and almost pushing her off her feet. She blindly threw another punch and felt her fist hit flesh. When she was back on her feet, panting and fists still raised, she smirked. His lower lip was split and bleeding. He spit a mouthful of blood onto the ground, then went at her again.

They continued trading blows, one after the other. The moment she'd split his lip, though, something had changed. It was as if he'd been toying with her before that. His fists flew faster and he was hitting her harder. She didn't understand where his rage stemmed from or why he was attacking her, but she didn't just take it. Her one advantage was that she was fast- almost faster than he was, but it didn't do her much good. Her own blows were like a child's compared to his. At one point, he kicked the ribs on her left side and she actually screamed, falling to the ground. Tears had sprang to her eyes, blinding her. She forced herself back to her feet, though, and kicked up as hard as she could manage before falling to the ground again.

She knew he hadn't hit her again since she'd been on the ground, but she didn't hear him at all. Her own lip had been split, one of her eyes was beginning to swell shut, and now she felt sure her ribs were probably broken again. It took a long while for her to control her breathing to the point where rips of pain didn't continuously cripple her each time she sucked in lungs full of air. After that, she was able to open her eyes- well, her left one, at least. The right was almost completely swollen shut. Levi was on the ground about a meter away, unmoving but breathing. He didn't look quite as bad as she did, but there was more blood on him. She'd split the skin under his eye with one of her punches, and between that and his lip both bleeding freely, there was a thick trail of blood rolling down the right side of his face from his cheek and down over his chin and neck.

"What was all that for?" she breathed, not bothering to make herself get up just yet.

"Because you're too weak," he muttered back. "You say you can't do what we are trying to teach you, but the truth is that you just don't want to. You'd rather abandon everyone you care about and leave them to be turned out into Titan territory. That's pathetic. You disgust me."

"I don't care what you think," she whispered. His words had hurt, but she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. "What do you care anyway? They aren't your people. You don't owe them anything."

"Two people died on my first expedition because of my poor choices," he muttered. She was surprised by the confession, but remained silent. "I won't watch you make the same mistake." This was in total opposition to his typical personality. She'd never thought of him as someone who would try to force anyone to do something they didn't want to. Yet here he was, telling her that he wasn't going to let her run away. She laughed. It hurt horribly and she wound up curling up on her right side, cradling the left with her hands. He sat up and she saw the scrape under his chin from the tip of her boot.

"What happened to the crap about not knowing if a choice was right or wrong until after it was made?" she breathed, recalling an overheard conversation between Eren and Alois.

"Sometimes it's obvious," Levi muttered, narrowing his eyes at her. "You think that boy can handle being responsible for the lives of everyone in your village?" She didn't answer. She knew he couldn't, and apparently so did Levi. "Stop pitying yourself. It's pathetic. Now get up." He stood and she watched him wander over to his horse, grabbing its reins and stroking its nose. She took a deep breath and more tears sprang to her eyes. She rolled to her stomach, her knees below her, and forced herself up. Half bent over, she swayed, her vision darkening and the world spinning as she held her breath from the pain radiating throughout her torso. She was about to fall again, but she felt his hand grip the top of her right arm and keep her on her feet. He began to drag her somewhere. She blinked rapidly, getting her vision to clear.

"I think you broke my ribs," she choked out, followed by a few choice curses. He'd grabbed Osten's reins and pressed them into her hand. She tried to climb into his saddle, but slipped and almost hit the ground. Levi kept his grip on her arm, though, and hauled her up. He pushed her into her saddle by her butt, but she was too distracted by the stabbing pain in her side to care. A few moments later, Osten was trotting along behind his horse. It took everything she had left just to remain in the saddle.

The ride back to headquarters was brutal. She almost passed out twice, but the fear of falling and injuring herself further kept her alter enough to hold on to Osten for dear life. She could hear murmurs and whispers when she felt sure they reached the flat yard at last, but she couldn't quite make out the words. Someone stopped her horse.

"What the fuck happened to you two?" She recognized the lazy drawl as Peter's voice and tried open her right eye to peer over at him. Although he'd asked the question with a joke in his tone, there was a deep wrinkle in his forehead from worry.

"We had a conversation," Levi stated. She could see him just behind Peter hopping off his horse. She let slip a small, triumphant smirk when she watched him cringe.

"With fists," she whispered, realizing her voice was weak and wavering.

"Well, get down, let me look at ya," Peter sighed, looking defeated by her lame joke. She tried to move, but spikes of pain radiated throughout her torso and she gave a little whimper of pain.

"I'm fairly certain I broke her ribs," Levi stated from what sounded like a very far-off place.

"For fuck's sake!" Peter groaned, exasperated. "You're gonna murder this girl… Just wakes up from a coma and now she's got twice-broken ribs… Fuck!" She could hear more words exchanged, but at that point her awareness had faded. Someone had grabbed her leg, tossing over Osten's back, and trying to lower her from his back. Fingers caught a tender spot just under the bottom of her left rib and her entire body cringed against the pain- only causing her more. It was a never-ending and vicious cycle. At one point, clarity returned and she distinctly heard him say, "Someone go find the kid that came with her! It's time he learned something useful…"

She wanted to shake her head, yell out no, and protest in every way. Alois didn't need to see her all busted up yet again. It was like a bad omen. She'd been injured when she was found so long ago by the Survey Corps; she'd cracked her skull open just before they reached Wall Rose; and now she'd been in a pointless fight and re-broke all of the same ribs. Not to mention all of the scars she'd collected over her lifetime. Armin had seen them once, she didn't want Alois to have the same impression of her. She was jostled slightly as whoever carried her began to walk. She managed to choke out the words, "Not Alois," just before the pain increased to the point where she had to keep her jaw clenched shut with as much force as she could muster to prevent from shouting out.

Her existence was nothing more than pain for what felt like hours. Logically, she knew it couldn't have been more than a couple of minutes. At one point during the onslaught, she realized she was laying down, but she wasn't left still for long. Someone had lifted her under her arms once more. It was all she could do to keep her lips pressed tightly together and not to utter a sound. Eventually she was left laying down once more. The pain faded slowly. Her awareness of the world outside of herself came back.

"This girl's been through hell, ain't she?" Peter's question bothered her, but she remained silent for a moment to try to discern who he was speaking to.

"Yeah," came Armin's soft reply. "That's why I don't understand why she said she was leaving… Then the Captain goes after her and they both come back beat up. It doesn't make any sense."

"Maybe it did me some good," she muttered, opening her left eye. The right was swollen shut. Now that she could focus on something other than the pain in her ribs, she realized that the rest of her was pretty beat-up too. She could feel the forming bruises on her upper arms and thighs, feel her jaw ache as she moved it.

"Figured you be knocked out," Peter remarked. She turned her head so that she could look at him. He was sitting on a little bed identical to the one she was in. There were a total of eight of those beds in the room, four lined up on each wall opposite each other. The fire burned to her left, warming her up. Her clothes were still damp from where she'd rolled around in the wet grass. "Thought we lost you on the way here."

"I was in and out," Eve admitted with a light shrug. "Help me up?" Peter nodded and grabbed her shoulders, slipping one arm behind her as he shoved the pillow behind her back. She grunted as he bent her over, but when she relaxed against the pillow, the pain faded. She looked down for a moment and frowned. Her entire torso was covered with a few layers of a thick, cloth bandage that was wrapped tightly enough to keep her from moving much on her own, but that was all. She grabbed the edge of the blanket on the bed and pulled it up. She didn't feel comfortable just lounging in the infirmary with nothing but bandages covering her chest. "What's the damage?"

Peter passed her a canteen and she snatched it away before guzzling much of it down. "Four broken ribs. Seventh, eighth, ninth, and tenth. Left side. The top two have some fracturing, but the bottom two have complete breaks, though I don't think they're displaced." Peter gave her a heavy sigh and accepted the canteen she held back out for him. "You're lucky you didn't puncture a lung."

Eve gave him a light shrug once more. "I'll be alright in a week or so."

"No, you won't," Peter snapped. She thought it was odd; he'd never behaved so seriously before. His natural attitude was to tease and make jokes at others' expense. "Damn it, Eve! We leave in three weeks for another expedition. If you so much as do a single fuckin' sit-up before then, I swear I'll make 'em force you to stay here."

"You can't do that!" Eve protested, her anger welling up inside of her. "Besides, if I don't do their stupid evaluation before we leave, they'll kick me out anyway."

"Like hell I can't," Peter threatened. "And all I gotta do is tell Ed that you're no good and he'll make the higher ups understand that you can't do it for another few weeks." Eve's hands fisted around the blanket at her sides. "Chill out, would you? Look at the bright side- no more PT or hand-to-hand for you."

"And I'll continue to be weaker than everyone else and not able to keep up," Eve mumbled darkly.

"You didn't do anything like that when you were out in your village," Armin remarked, sitting on the foot of the bed across from hers. "There was never any issue with you keeping up then."

"I also never laid in a coma for three weeks and let all my muscles atrophy," Eve snapped. "Levi finally knocks some fucking sense into me and now I can't even get up to do anything about it…"

"What do you mean?" Armin prodded. She knew he wanted answers, but she wasn't up for discussion at this moment. She turned her head to stare at the fire.

"I'm gonna go get us some lunch," Peter interjected. "Eve, you do so much as attempt to get out of that bed, and I'll personally cut your foot off." She rolled her eyes, but he chuckled and gave her a big grin before heading for the far end of the room where the only exit lay.

The moment he was gone, Armin looked at her once more with those intense, questioning blue eyes. "What happened with Levi?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Eve asked, her tone a little too sharp. "We had ourselves a fist fight." Armin just kept staring, not bothering to give that answer a response. Eve tried to take a deep breath, but it sent shockwaves down her side once more. "Just drop it, okay? I'm determined again to make this whole shitty situation work in my favor, or at the very least, in favor of my people. That's all you need to worry about."

Armin frowned a little, but nodded. "I'll drop it," he agreed, "but you have to promise me something."

"What?" Eve asked, a feeling of dread sinking into the pit of her stomach.

"You can't give up again," he said softly. "That's not like you." Eve's head fell back against the head board and she nodded once. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me," she muttered. "I'm not doing it for you."

"I know," he said softly, "but you're too strong to just give up." She gave a pained sigh and her head turned so that she could stare into the flames once more. Armin was always so optimistic… She felt the small part of a half-assed attempted at a smile tug at her lips. She needed him to be optimistic. The other members of the Survey Corps were fairly nice to her overall, but other than Sasha, Armin was the only person she could consider her friend here.

"Thanks for that," she muttered. "I try to tell myself that I am, but it helps to hear it from someone else." Rolling her head over to peer at him once more, she saw him lift his head with a little smile. She returned it.

* * *

**A/N**: Sorry it's been so long since my last post! I've had that pesky "Lolita" series in my brain and I wasn't able to get it out until I wrote it all down. But now I'm back on Survival and I hope to stay here!

Thank you so very, very much to MercedesCarello for all of your amazing help! I really couldn't get through this without you! (If any of you haven't read _Burning Titan_, I highly recommend it!)

Please, please, please, for the love of all things fan fiction, leave a review! I can't express how much reviews mean to me- even little one-liners bring a huge grin to my face. It'll take you just a few extra seconds to type something up- don't read and leave!


	7. Fun

First things first: A HUGE thank you goes out to both MercedesCarello and Just 2 Dream of You!

I never could have written this without them.

Several of the ideas contained within this chapter came from MercedesCarello. Such as: the "speakeasy" Connie is running out of the closet, and the scene where Sasha and Connie are teasing Jean and Mercedes about their wedding. By the way, Mercedes and Baena (as well as Fhalz and Oliver- briefly mentioned) all belong to MercedesCarello. They are her wonderful and amazing OCs that I've borrowed for the purposes of adding some humor to this story! They come from her story _The Burning Titan_, and I highly recommend it. It's an awesome read! (She also helped me edit and polish this chapter up- as she has with several other chapters.)

The idea of the diary's existence came from Just 2 Dream of You and her amazingly funny brain. You should totally go check out her work! You will die from laughter.

I am super grateful to the both of them!

* * *

Chapter Seven: Fun

* * *

Without the burden of physical training or learning hand-to-hand combat anymore, Eve found she had entirely too much free time. Unfortunately, Captain Levi had noticed as well. He would put her to work scouring portions of the castle they called headquarters. It took him coming back to tell her to do a room all over again only once for her to realize his definition of clean and her own were not so very far from different.

The room she'd started with was a huge room that might have been a library at one point. There were only a few old shelves left in the room that she'd asked a few of the guys to clear out for her (since Peter wouldn't let her lift anything heavier than a tea kettle). That left six blank walls, each about four and a half meters long (~15 ft), and three meters high (~10 ft). Someone had been nice enough to bring her a ladder, but it took her nearly the entire day to scrub the strange yellow slime from the stone walls. Levi had come in, taken one look at the place, and told her to do it again. She was tempted to throw a fit, but she'd seen the gunk still stuck in the cracks and the pebbles caught in the splits between the wooden planks of the floor. If it had been her own home, she'd have done so much more.

The next day saw her in the room again, using a spare toothbrush she'd swiped from a supply closet. That particular supply closet, she discovered to her delight, was loaded with random treasures: a spare uniform jacket (which happened to fit her better than her own), an extra pair of boots (that looked like they belonged to a giant), a broken mirror (with a beautiful and ornate frame), several goblets (all heavy and seemed to be rimmed with gold), an entire case of fine silverware (tarnished), a box of old books (she didn't read much- it was a skill set she'd only very recently found any use for), a locked diary (which wasn't nearly old enough to belong with the rest of the junk), a set of twin silver daggers (which Eve promptly hid away for future use), a crate with various bottles of scented oils (three smelled decidedly like plums, but the other scents she couldn't readily identify), the majority of the other boxes contained tapered candles (scent-free but too waxy), but her biggest find was the leather satchel in an old truck filled with various bottles of alcohol. She'd locked the closet back up, but held onto the key for a while. Hange was the one she'd received it from, but the odd-ball was nowhere to be found, so Eve didn't see the harm in just keeping it.

While the others were out running their laps, she'd started scrubbing again. Armed with a bucket of soapy water, several old rags, and the toothbrush, she'd started to the left of the door at the very top of the first section of wall in the hexagonal room. By the time breakfast was over and Sasha had come to find her, she'd reached the middle of the second wall.

"Wow!" Sasha exclaimed, setting the plate on a little table Eve had placed in the center of the room for that exact reason. "It looks so clean…" Eve looked down and watched as the brunette reached out and touched the first section of wall. "It's not slimy anymore!"

"It better not be," Eve remarked darkly, eyes narrowed down at Sasha with an intensity that made the younger girl take a step back. Eve went straight back to the wall, scrubbing furiously with the toothbrush at one particularly troublesome crack that seemed to hold an infinite amount of the weird, odd-smelling ooze.

"Take a break," Sasha said, already holding her hands up in self-defense from Eve's wrathful look. "You still need to eat!"

"Not yet!" Eve snapped. She was grinding her teeth together. This room had very quickly become the bane of her entire existence. "It. Won't. Come. Off." Each word was accented with the force of her scrubbing just a little harder. The toothbrush snapped in her hand. "Fuck!" The handle, as it snapped, had left a nice cut in the palm of her bare hand that instantly began to burn from the soap. She tossed the broken piece still in her hand away with enough force for it to bounce off the floor and smack Sasha in the forehead.

Eve didn't notice until she'd climbed down the ladder and saw Sasha holding her bleeding forehead with her palm. "That hurt." Sasha gave her a nervous giggle and took another step back as Eve moved closer to her.

"Come here," Eve sighed, her rage at the goo and the broken toothbrush fading away as she looked at her new-found friend. Warily, Sasha took a few steps forward. When Eve didn't suddenly turn into a three-headed monster and eat her skin, Sasha relaxed. Eve grabbed one of the clean, unused rags from her pile and pulled Sasha's hand away before pressing the rag there. After a moment, she pulled it away and found just a small scratch. Peter had taught her that head wounds often bled a lot, but as long as it was just a surface scratch, they usually weren't too serious. The bleeding had already stopped when she pulled the rag away, so she just tried to wipe some of the blood from Sasha's forehead.

"What's the damage, doc?" Sasha teased.

Eve gave her a reproachful look for a moment, then sighed and attempted a smile. "You're fine. Just go wash of the rest of the blood. It's not even bleeding anymore." The nickname had brought a painful flashback of memory to the way Doc himself had appeared the day she'd gone to see her people, disheveled and off balance. "I'm going to see if I can't find another toothbrush…"

"Where'd you find that one anyway?" Sasha asked.

"One of the supply closets full of junk," she said with a shrug. She wasn't about to reveal her discoveries. "Go wash that off- use soap!" Sasha nodded and pranced away. Eve didn't even consider the plate of steaming potatoes waiting for her on the tiny table. Instead, she went straight for the closet. With thoughts about downing a few gulps of the alcohol in the trunk hidden in the back, she pulled the key from her pocket as she made her way swiftly down the long corridor.

Rounding the corner, she found Connie and Jean both at the door, trying to get in. Jean noticed her first. She didn't miss the way that he sort of ducked his head, as if he was ashamed of what he was doing. He tapped Connie on the shoulder and he looked over at Eve before visibly paling and backing away from the door. She moved closer, holding up the key.

"Hey!" Connie protested. "Where did you get that?"

"From Hange," she answered with a shrug. "I was looking for a spare toothbrush to clean those damn walls with."

"You're still going at it?" Jean asked, a little surprised. She nodded once. "Damn. We'd all given up on that room."

"I've got one and a half walls clean," she said, allowing a little pride. "Just takes elbow grease."

"Can, um… can you unlock the door for me?" Connie asked. "I'm looking for something…" She saw through his lie with ease, but didn't call him on it. She was curious about what he was going to go after once he was inside. Stepping closer to the door, she slipped the key into the rusty lock and gave it a few wiggles before it finally clicked open. Pulling it open, she stepped inside and pretended to look through a few boxes for the extra toothbrushes- though she knew exactly where to find them.

Connie and Jean went instantly to the very back of the deep closet, stepping over boxes and side-stepping a stack of crates with ease. She envied them and their ability to move their torsos. She was still all wrapped up with bandages and couldn't do much bending or twisting. It had only been a week since her brawl with Levi in the grass. Although her eye had finally healed up, she still had a few fading bruises and the grass stains in her white uniform pants had only faded, not disappeared, despite her best efforts at scrubbing them clean. She turned her head and watched as they bent over the trunk.

"So that's yours, is it?" she asked, startling them both as if they'd forgotten she was there. With careful and slow movements, she made her way over to them. "Where'd you get it all?"

Sheepishly, Connie opened the bag inside of the trunk and revealed the contents to her. "I have a friend in Ehrmich that gets it for me. I keep it here and trade it for stuff." Jean held up a new-looking deck of cards in one hand and what looked like a wolf carved from wood in the other. "Since I don't get to go to town with everyone else most of the time, this was an easy way for me to still get the stuff I want."

"Why don't you get to go to town?" she asked, watching as Connie took both things from Jean and shoved them deep into his pockets before handing over one of the small bottles.

He sucked his teeth and cut his eyes to the side, annoyed. "I get in trouble over something or another."

"Like skipping out on laundry and dishes," Jean remarked, mostly teasing, but with a slight hint of his own annoyance. "Serves you right. You're lucky you have all this to trade for."

"I need to up my prices," Connie threatened, knocking the lid of the trunk shut with a loud thunk.

"Then no one would trade with you," Jean shot back. "We can all get it ourselves any time we go to the market. It's just easier because it's already here and you keep it hidden from the Squad Leaders."

"Some gratitude would be nice," Connie grumbled.

"Alright boys," Eve sighed, scolding them as if they were four. "That's enough." They glared at each other for a moment more before turning their heads away from the other. "So whose diary is that then?" She pointed at the brown, leather-bound and locked book resting on the shelf above the trunk. Connie managed to grab it before Jean did and stared at it.

"I never noticed this here before," he muttered, flipping it over. She imagined he was looking for a name, but she'd done that already. They'd have to break the lock to get into it. "You got a hair pin or something?" He looked up at Eve expectantly. She shook her head.

"Just the hair tie," she said with a shrug. She moved to the stack of old boxes to Connie's left and retrieved four additional toothbrushes. "It's just a diary. Leave it and let's go before your secret stash is discovered."

"I knew it!" Ymir stuck her head around the edge of the door. Eve rolled her eyes and the tall girl walked into the closet with them, Krista tagging along behind her.

"Come on, we shouldn't be in here!" Krista whispered. "Let's go before someone else comes. I don't want anyone to get into trouble…"

Ymir tossed one causal arm around the smaller blonde's shoulders and laughed. "You're always so sweet, Krista! We won't get into trouble- Connie and Jean will. They're the ones trading for booze."

"Keep your mouth shut and I'll give you some!" Connie pleaded, opening the trunk once more. Ymir grinned and Eve sighed. She tried to move out of the way, but she wound up wedged into a tight corner while Ymir made her selection. She grabbed two bottles. "Hey!"

"One for me, one for Krista," she explained with an easy shrug. "You're buying our silence, remember? Might want to pick a better hiding spot next time."

"I told you this place was too easy to find!" Jean bit at Connie.

Connie groaned. "The door was usually locked! How was I supposed to know there was an actual key? I've always just picked it."

"So that's why you wanted the hair pin," Eve mused, more to herself than to anyone else. Krista, ever the helpful little bee, pulled the object referenced from her hair and held it out.

"What do you need this for?" she asked. Connie snatched it from her hand and bent it before bending over the journal.

"Watch it, shorty!" Ymir snapped at him. "It's rude to snatch things." Eve only watched as he picked at the tiny lock with the hair pin, digging into it until they all heard it snap open.

"What are you all doing in here?" Eve turned her head and found both Sasha and Armin at the door. Armin had spoken up and stepped inside. "Whose diary is that?"

Connie already had the diary open and was flipping through the pages intently. "It's full of mushy love-letter crap!" he griped. Jean snatched it from him and flipped a few pages. She noticed the tint of blush on his cheeks before he quickly turned the page again.

"What does it say?" Sasha asked, cramming her way into the tight space between Krista and the wall of crates beside her.

Jean held out the book to whomever wanted it, and Ymir was the first to grab it. "'Your hair shines as brightly as the sun on the banks of the rapidly flowing river…' What kind of shit is this?"

"I think it's sweet," Krista muttered, her cheeks tinted with a little blush as she looked down at the dusty floor.

"Well it's definitely a guy's hand writing," Ymir mentioned. She latched her arm around Krista once more and leaned close to her ear. "Aw, Krista, do you want me to write you pretty poems and recite them to you?" She finished with a laugh that Eve thought was almost mocking. Krista shook her head furiously.

"There's a lot worse than that," Jean grumbled. "Flip back a few pages. You'll see what I mean…"

Sasha grabbed the book and slipped back towards the door as she flipped through the pages herself. "'Your eyes shimmer like the moon in the black of night, piercing my soul and…' Oh wow… I'm not going to read that!" She shoved the book at Armin who looked down at it for a moment, curious, then held it out as if he didn't know what to do with it. Eve chuckled to herself. Whatever was written there had made everyone blush furiously.

"It can't be that bad," she remarked, slipping out of the tight spot she was wedged in and forcing Ymir and Krista to move back a little as she took the book from Armin. She found a new page. _I love imagining your hands touching every inch of your body, and wish they were my own – I'd take you in my hands like the potter takes the clay._ Snapping the book shut, she cleared her throat and looked out at the others. They were looking at her expectantly. "I think we need to just leave this here."

"No way!" Connie protested, grabbing the book before she could put it on the shelf they'd found it on. "I want to know who wrote it! There's got to be a name in here somewhere…"

"Why would anyone write their own name in their diary?" Ymir asked, her tone biting and insulting.

"They could have written the name of the person they were talking about," Jean suggested with a shrug. "At least we'd know that…"

"You guys," Krista whined softly, "that's not fair to whoever wrote it! It was a locked diary! We shouldn't be reading it…"

"Oh lighten up," Ymir teased. "We're just having some fun!"

"What kind of fun?" Eve bristled at the sound of Eren's voice and narrowed her eyes at him, then glared openly at Mikasa. They still hadn't resolved their tension from that night in her village when she'd wanted to kill him. She still wanted to, honestly, but she knew she'd never get close enough as long as Mikasa was his shadow. "What are you all doing in here?"

"Eve found this diary," Connie said, holding it up. "We were reading it. It's bad, man. All kinds of gross poems and stuff. We want to know who wrote it."

"Or who it was written about," Jean added. Eve found it funny how they'd been butting heads just a moment ago, but now they were pressing their heads together as they poured through each page in the diary, looking for a name. "This is nuts…"

"Gross how?" Eren asked, confused.

"It's not gross," Ymir corrected. "It's sappy and romantic."

"That's just as bad!" Connie interjected. "I mean, come on! 'Your hair smells of the freshest roses cut on the finest spring day'? Who writes that crap? Not to mention the other stuff…"

"Other… stuff?" Eren questioned. Eve sighed.

"'I can only imagine the way the sweet nectar of your inner juices would taste on my tongue' kind of crap." Jean answered, choosing a random line to read from the page they were currently studying.

"So what do we know so far?" Armin asked, his eyebrows knitted together. "Blonde hair, maybe blue eyes? Anything else?"

"Um…" Connie muttered, his cheeks flaming furiously once more. Eve almost laughed at the way he shifted on his feet uncomfortably, his eyes darting around the room before darting back down. He hunched his shoulders and tried to slide back away from everyone, but couldn't go any farther. Connie forked over the book, leaving it in Jean's hands and shoving his own deep into his pockets. Eve couldn't repress her slight giggle at his discomfort. No one else seemed to notice.

Ymir laughed. "That sounds like you, Krista!"

"What?" Krista said, her face turning as red as a tomato. She shook her head furiously. "No! It can't be me!"

Eve sighed through the raucous laughing and stared at the toothbrushes in her hand. She'd become obsessed with cleaning the walls in that room, and these people were keeping her from her goal. She saw no way to get around them, though. If they didn't all get out of this room soon, one of the Squad Leaders was going to come around and catch them. They'd probably all get yelled at and punished for taking a break so early in the morning. Everyone had chores to do.

"What the _hell_ is going on here?" She rolled her eyes when she heard Levi's question. Everyone froze and she noticed Jean attempted to surreptitiously slip the diary to Connie to hide. When Jean's hand brushed against Connie, he flinched hard, and jumped away from him, toppling one of the stacks of crates containing candles. Everyone was shouting and scrambling- except Eve. She remained perfectly in place and just watched as the chaos ensued.

"What the _fuck_, man?" Jean shouted at Connie.

"Jean!" Ymir yelled. "You almost hit Krista!"

"Sasha, your forehead is bleeding!" Armin exclaimed, searching for something to use to staunch the blood flow.

"Mikasa, get off!" Eren complained. She'd shoved him against the wall beside the door and stood in front of him, keeping any falling debris from hitting him.

"Ow! Ymir, you stepped on my foot!" Sasha whined.

Eve just laughed, wrapping her arms around her chest from the pain the action caused, but unable to stop. Jean was still trying to scramble away from Connie, who was too embarrassed to even move. Ymir had picked Krista up bridal-style and was shoving by Armin and Sasha to carry her out of the closet. Armin was pressing a stray piece of cloth to Sasha's forehead, and Sasha was leaning heavily against another stack of crates that was swaying. Mikasa drug Eren out into the hall.

"Someone explain to me why you all were piled up in this closet!" Levi demanded.

"Eve found a diary," Ymir spoke up first. Eve's laughter was finally dying off, but she couldn't be mad at Ymir- not yet. "We were reading it, trying to figure out who wrote it."

Levi rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath before addressing Eve herself. "Aren't you supposed to be cleaning?" He looked out at the others. "You all obviously don't have enough to do. I can fix that."

"We were just leaving," Jean muttered. He slipped out of the closet and vanished as Ymir, Krista, Eren, and Mikasa all had. Eve gave a sideways look at Connie. He was still frozen in place, hunched over with his face bright with embarrassment. Armin pulled Sasha out into the hall to better look at the cut on her forehead that had reopened.

"You alright, Connie?" Eve teased. He shook his head furiously.

"Just... just leave me alone!" His voice cracked on the word "alone" and she chuckled again, but made her way out into the hall. Armin appeared to be dragging Sasha to the infirmary. Eve was making her way back to the room she had been cleaning earlier, but noticed Levi following hot on her heels.

"What's wrong with Connie?" he asked. She laughed again, but couldn't keep it up. Her left side was inflamed enough as it was.

"He... read something in that diary that made him rather uncomfortable." She was trying to be subtle, but when she looked over her shoulder, she knew that Levi's blank expression wasn't bored. He didn't understand what she meant. She sighed. How could she put it delicately? "He's got a boner." A hint of surprise flashed in Levi's expression, but then it settled back into his usual bored expression, but it bordered on disgust.

"What is wrong with these kids?" he muttered, more to himself than to her.

She smiled to herself and entered the room she was cleaning. She went for the plate of now-cold potatoes and popped one piece into her mouth. "They got more than they bargained for in that diary. It was... descriptive."

"Ymir said you found it," he mentioned as he studied the one wall she'd managed to scrub clean. He seemed satisfied and she smirked.

"When I was looking for the toothbrushes, I just noticed it on the shelf. Connie is the one who picked the lock on it."

"A locked diary?" Levi asked, lifting one eyebrow. "It was brown, wasn't it?" She nodded once and ate another piece of potato.

"You've seen it before, haven't you?" she asked. He didn't answer, but she knew he had. "I'm curious, too, you know. Whoever wrote that has quite the vivid imagination."

"You have walls to clean. You don't have time to worry about who that diary belongs to." Instantly, she began to suspect that it belonged to Erwin. Levi didn't protect anyone else like that. Unless, she thought, it was his own. She giggled to herself, considering someone like Levi writing such sentimental, romantic garbage. She honestly couldn't see Erwin doing that either, but she couldn't be positive about either of them. She didn't know them that we'll yet. She abandoned the rest of the potatoes and grabbed her bucket before climbing back up the ladder.

"What is this crap on these walls, anyway?" she asked.

"Mold," he answered. Without looking at him, she knew there was an expression of utter revulsion on his face. She grimaced herself and went back to scrubbing the same spot she'd been working on earlier.

"If you're going to stay and chat, you might as well clean," Eve remarked, glancing down at him. To her surprise, he did not turn to leave. He took a moment to glare at her angrily, but his attention focused on the other walls and she watched his fingers twitch. After a moment of silent deliberation, he shrugged out of his uniform jacket and let it hang on the doorknob, then rolled up his sleeves. She watched for a moment more as he grabbed two more rags from the pile she'd gathered. She moved down the ladder and he took the bucket from her. They both began on the walls once more- Levi on the one next to hers, starting from the bottom as she continued from her half-way mark.

* * *

Lunchtime passed with more gossip about the diary and who it might have belonged to, but the general consensus was that it must have belonged to someone that was dead. It passed out of conversation, but he was still freaked out about Connie, who he hadn't been seen since the incident. It was Sasha who brought up the decided lack of people present at lunch.

"Where's Eve?" she asked with a frown. "She never eats… Connie isn't here either."

"The Captain and Hange are gone too," Krista piped up. Jean looked around at the slim crowd and realized there were more than just those three missing. It wasn't strange for people to skip out on lunch, though. Many of them would just find something later. He'd done that himself on more than one occasion.

"Eve is probably still cleaning that room," Armin mentioned. He stood to clear away his empty plate. "I'll take her something." Jean finished his food a moment later and copied Armin's actions. He'd had the idea of sneaking away from everyone for a couple of hours and catching a nap somewhere.

"Jean!" he turned at the call and saw Hange waving him over. With a sigh, realizing he'd never escape her now that she was back, he walked over to her. She had a slim white box tied with twine in her hands. "I need you to find the Captain and take this to him."

"I'm not a delivery boy," he grumbled.

"You are today!" she sang with her insane grin. "Hurry up! I need you to come back here as soon as you deliver that."

He rolled his eyes and made to stomp away, but he realized that the last place he'd seen the Captain was when they'd all left the supply closet. He thought he remembered Levi following Eve to the room she was cleaning. No doubt he'd gone in there to criticize her efforts again. Jean made his way up the two flights of stairs and wandered down the long halls, passing the now-closed door to the supply closet. A shiver ran down his spine and he felt sick to his stomach when he thought of when he'd tried to give the diary to Connie to hide.

When Jean turned the final corner to reach the library, he'd just had the intention of sticking his head in the room and asking Eve if she knew where the Captain had gone. Instead, he found Armin standing in the middle of the hall, staring into the room with a nervous grin. He chuckled every few seconds. "Armin?" The blond looked over at Jean and held a finger up to his lips for him to be quiet. His ears began to pick up the sounds of an argument.

"There's still slime all over the wall!" That was Eve's shrill voice.

"It's no worse than yours!" He knew the Captain's bark entirely too well to have to guess that the voice was his.

"Bull shit! My wall is much cleaner!"

"I can still see mold!"

"At least it doesn't feel gross when you touch the walls I've cleaned- not like yours!"

"It's not even dry yet!"

"That has nothing to do with it!"

Jean came to a halt beside Armin and just stared. Eve and Levi were practically at each other's throats, wielding nasty toothbrushes as weapons. For the first time, it became painfully obvious to Jean that Eve was actually shorter than the Captain. He'd known she was short, but he'd always just guessed they were closer to the same height. He had at least five centimeters (about 2 and ½ inches) on her though. He had to laugh, just a little, as Armin did.

"How long has this been going on?" he whispered.

"They were arguing when I got here," Armin answered. "At least five minutes…"

"I wonder how long they'll keep it up." Jean chuckled again, but he must have been too loud this time. Levi and Eve both snapped their heads to the side, glaring at Jean and Armin.

"What?" they both shouted, equal levels of irritation in their voices.

"Uh," Jean stuttered for a moment. He remembered the box in his hand and held it up. "Hange asked me to deliver this for you."

"Eve needs to eat, too," Armin spoke up. "She skipped breakfast."

The two who were arguing gave each other a final glare before Levi stomped away. He snatched the white box of Jean's hand, grabbed his jacket from the doorknob, and pushed passed Armin and Jean on his way down the hall.

"What the hell happened?" Jean asked, still in shock.

"I cleaned my wall better than he cleaned his," Eve stated with a huff. She tossed her rag on the edge of the bucket and pointed to one of the walls. "This one is mine." She pointed to the other. "This one is his." Jean narrowed his eyes, but he couldn't discern any difference.

"Okay…" he muttered. "Well, I have to go see what Hange wants."

"Come on, Eve, you need to eat." Armin insisted. She nodded and Jean turned to head back to the kitchen.

"Pretentious little shit thinks he cleans better than I do," Eve grumbled. Jean and Armin both chuckled. They always despised Levi's cleaning chores- nothing was ever quite good enough, no matter how hard they worked. It was amusing to see that someone had matched, if not surpassed, his idea of levels of cleanliness.

Eve continued her mutterings as they made their way back to the kitchen, but he couldn't understand most of it. The few words he happened to catch always involved calling Levi short and referenced cleaning in some way. "How can you call Levi short if you're shorter than he is?" Jean finally asked, looking over his shoulder at her.

Her eyes widened. "He's not taller than me! We're the same height!" He laughed. Her expression hardened into annoyance with her eyes narrowing and her lips pressed tightly together.

"He's at least five centimeters taller than you are," Jean said through laughs. "How did you not notice?" She crossed her arms over her chest angrily and puffed out her cheeks, declining to answer as she pouted. He pushed open the door to the kitchen, then froze.

"'Cee?" Armin asked, sounding pleasantly surprised. "What are you doing here?"

Mercedes and Baena were standing in the center of the room, chatting casually with Connie and Reiner, who'd finally shown up for lunch. "Hange called for me," she replied with a shrug. "How's everything going?"

"Is everything okay with my people?" Eve asked, her attitude instantly changing into one of nervous concern.

"They're all fine. Fhalz and Oliver are still there," Mercedes answered. "How are you holding up?"

"Levi broke her ribs," Sasha chimed, sliding into the little circle that had formed. "They got into a fist fight over something."

"Seriously?" Baena asked, her eyes wide with concern. "Why would he do that?"

"I needed it," Eve admitted with a casual shrug. "Knocked some sense into me. My people are treating you all well?"

Baena nodded quickly, her light blonde hair falling in her eyes. She gave a bright grin. "That little boy, Leo, he's just the cutest little thing! Mina lets me play with him sometimes." Jean noticed the small, sad smile Eve wore, but he didn't say anything about the situation. He'd always thought of it as a little odd. Was the kid hers or not?

Alik, one of the graduates from the 105th, wandered over to their little group meeting, tagging along behind Krista and Ymir. "Who's she?" Jean watched the faces around him light up and smacked his forehead with his palm.

"Oh, that's Jean's wife!" Sasha said brightly, a goofy grin on his face. Both he and Mercedes reacted in a similar manner: jaws dropping, eyes growing wide, and posture becoming ridged.

"Wait… what?" Eve asked, eyeing the both of them with one brow raised in suspicion.

"Since when?" Baena gasped, sounding offended that she didn't know. She rounded on Mercedes. "How could you not tell me?"

"Oh yeah," Connie continued for Sasha, his casual attitude sent a spike of annoyance straight into Jean's brain, but he hadn't recovered enough to say anything. "They got married last spring- it was a really nice day. Sunny and warm."

"Krista helped us plan everything!" Sasha said brightly, wrapping her arm around the girl's slender shoulders. Krista looked just as surprised as everyone else, but she gave a nervous grin as if she was pretending to be in on the joke. "'Cee's dress was beautiful! All white and lacey! Her hair was down and had these cute little white flowers all in it!"

"And Jean didn't look too bad himself," Connie continued. "There weren't a lot of us there – it was more of an intimate ceremony –but it was really nice. Hey, isn't your anniversary coming up soon, too?" Connie waggled his eyebrows at Jean as if to insinuate something, but Jean was still stuck in the muck of confusion, embarrassment, and outrage.

"The vows were just the sweetest! I've never heard anything more romantic in my life!" Sasha said, tears springing to her eyes to add to the effect. "Armin cried!"

Jean almost spun to look around at Armin, but he couldn't make his limbs move correctly. He sputtered, trying to find something to say to counter this entire conversation. He looked to Mercedes and found her eyes closed with a tight-lipped smile. In a move he almost missed her make, her fist shot out and clipped Connie in the shoulder. He yelped and grabbed his arm, rubbing it. "How is it that you have enough free time to come up with such stupid jokes?"

"Aw, come on!" Sasha whined with her stupid grin still firmly in place. "Lighten up! It was just a bit of fun! We all know it's going to happen one day, and when it does, we'll have it all planned out!"

"Sasha, Connie," Eve stated calmly but firmly, "I think you two should probably go somewhere before someone smashes in your skulls." Connie and Sasha gave her a nervous laugh, but visibly backed away from Mercedes and Jean a few steps before turning and running for the door. "Oh what a day…"

"I'm going to kill him," Jean muttered darkly.

"Not if I get to him first," Mercedes shot back with a smirk.

"So… it was a joke?" Baena asked, sounding just a little depressed. "I mean… I was mad that you didn't invite me to the wedding… But I was still happy you two finally got hitched…"

Mercedes and Jean both heaved heavy sighs and Armin and Eve chuckled. Krista and Ymir wandered away, one of Ymir's hands latching onto the back of Alik's jacket and tugging him along behind her. "Let's give the lovebirds some time alone." Armin and Eve nodded to each other in and they made themselves scarce as well.

"Sorry," Jean said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head with one hand. Mercedes just smirked and shook her head.

* * *

Eve slipped outside once she'd rid herself of Armin's nagging (although well-intended) presence, insisting that she eat something. She was wandering around with a half of a loaf of bread in her hand, having promised to finish it. She breathed in the cool pre-winter air deeply. Her left side still ached a little when she took deep breaths, but she was managing. There were only a few people out in the cold. She brought her arms around her chest to keep herself warm, but enjoyed the short break she was allowing herself before she went back to attack the mold on the walls in the library.

The chicken coup wasn't far, so she made her way over to it, just looking for somewhere to go and something to look at. The leaves on the trees were dying and falling off, leaving the grounds covered in a random smattering of red and brown blotches. She could see a pair of rookies stuck raking up the leaves into piles and throwing them all into a wheelbarrow to be carted away. She found herself oddly grateful for her inside cleaning jobs.

The chickens were pecking at the remains of their breakfast, digging at their feathers, or resting on their eggs. She figured they wouldn't lay again after this. It was just too cold. She stuck her fingers inside of the wire fence and received a sharp peck from an angry white hen, but she just laughed softly. The sound of a muted conversation reached her ears and she held very still, trying to pick up on the words.

"Stop it, Reiner!" Her eyebrows furrowed. That sounded like Bertolt… "You have to snap out of this!"

"What are you talking about?" Reiner asked, almost annoyed, but not quite.

"You're not a soldier, Reiner!" Bertolt insisted. She could imagine the tall boy with his hands on his friend's shoulders, shaking him. "You're a warrior!"

There came no reply from Reiner, but a strangely eerie silence followed. She swallowed hard and got the distinct sensation of overhearing a conversation that wasn't meant for her ears. There was no more conversation for a long while, so she turned away from the chickens and headed back for the castle, keeping her eyes peeled. She hadn't seen either of them on her way out, but she hadn't been paying attention. She didn't see them on her way back in, either. There were chill bumps on her arms that she couldn't blame on the cold. Making her way back into the castle and through to the library, she considered Bertolt's words. What was wrong with Reiner? What had he meant when he'd said Reiner wasn't a soldier, but a warrior? It didn't make any sense.

She found herself scrubbing over the wall Levi had claimed to have finished, but she wasn't paying much attention to her actions. Mercedes had shown up, though she didn't know why and the explanation given hadn't been much of one. She'd overheard the conversation between Bertolt and Reiner that didn't make a lick of sense. As she fought to put some sort of explanation to the two situations, she found herself imagining impossible scenarios and far-fetched tales.

With a heavy, painful sigh, Eve returned her attention to the wall before her. Peter would come around before too much longer to quiz her some more on what she'd learned from him. There was little actual practice she could do without having an injured person, so for now she was just learning methodology. She began to think through that instead, pushing all of the other thoughts away for now. She had to prepare herself in whatever way she could for the examination coming in just a week and a half.

* * *

So, how did I do at my first-ever attempt at some humor?

I needed a break from the dark and angsty for a while, so I told MercedesCarello I wanted to write something funny, and she helped me out greatly. I really don't think this would be nearly as good without her help- and that of Just 2 Dream of You.

Next chapter we go back to the usual flow of things. I thought this one would be a nice change-up, though. It also helps to describe what everyone acts like when they aren't in combat/Titan-zones, and Eve's growing relationship with the others.

I really hope everyone enjoys reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!


	8. Discovery

Chapter Eight: Discovery

* * *

Gasping for breath, Eve bolted upright in her bed. It took several long moments for her to adjust to being awake. Sasha was hovering beside her, standing on one of the rungs of the ladder that led up to Eve's bed. Her eyebrows were knitted together and she wore a small frown. "Are you okay?"

Eve nodded. Using her sheet, she wiped away the sweat from her forehead. The intense feeling of fear and the adrenaline coursing through her veins were both still present, but she couldn't remember the nightmare that had caused the sensations. Rubbing her eyes and running her fingers through her loose hair, she took a few deep breaths to calm herself. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."

"You alright?" Hannah, the only other girl in her newly-formed squad, was sitting up in her own top bunk across the room. The girl below her slept like a rock, though, and continued to snore softly.

"Yes, sorry," Eve muttered. Hannah grunted and flopped back over on her side. Hannah's snores soon filtered into the background noise. Sasha climbed up onto Eve's bed, sitting across from her towards the foot of the bed. Eve curled up, wrapping her arms around her legs and resting her forehead on her knees for a moment.

"Wanna talk about it?" Sasha asked. Eve angled her head to look over at her, then shrugged lightly.

"I don't remember it," she answered. Burying her face in the tops of her knees once more, she sighed. "I always remember my nightmares… I don't understand this one."

"Maybe it's a good thing?" Sasha suggested. "It might just be stress. You do have the exam in a few days."

"Yeah," Eve whispered. She wasn't sure if that was the real reason, but it seemed to fit well enough. She felt like she could almost remember a specific image of someone familiar, but the thought vanished when she tried to focus on it.

"We should go find a snack!" Sasha suggested brightly. "Eating a little something always helps me go back to sleep after a nightmare."

"I'm not hungry," Eve said softly.

Sasha frowned at her. "You're still too skinny," she said, poking Eve's slender arm. "Eating a little more would do you some good."

"Then I'd get fat and I wouldn't be able to move so fast," Eve shot back with a smirk. They shared a chuckle. "I'm sorry I woke you up, Sasha. We should probably get back to sleep, though." Sasha agreed and climbed back down to her own bunk.

* * *

The next day, Sasha ended up falling asleep in the middle of doing the laundry. Sixteen sets of linens were found half-frozen in a pile around her, stuffed into wicker baskets that sat on the ground. Unfortunately, Eve found her just as she was kicked into wakefulness by an extremely disgruntled Captain Levi. She was promptly banned from attending the trip to the market, joining a rapidly growing group of people that included Connie, Jean, and, to everyone's great surprise, Mikasa. Connie and Jean had been officially caught smuggling the alcohol Connie had procured as they moved it from the supply closet to a hollowed out tree trunk. No one knew exactly why Mikasa had been punished, but the rumors had begun to flow and included every possibility from being caught in Eren's room after dark to disrespecting Commander Erwin in various ways.

* * *

The excitement that buzzed in the air baffled her. She didn't see how a simple trip to a market could produce such a charge in everyone's energy- especially so early in the morning, when most of her new companions were complaining about the hour, the weather, and everything else. There were no complaints to be heard from any mouth this morning, only a quiet and electrified hush.

The chill of winter had finally settled over the world, and she was freezing. Osten stamped his hooves into the frozen ground impatiently as she readied his saddle. With a soft chuckle, she stroked his nose to calm him. Everyone else had mounted their horses already. Armin trotted over to her side.

"Ready?" he asked. Even Armin seemed to have caught the fever of excitement. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes were almost sparkling. It could have been the icy wind stinging his face, but she doubted it.

"Yes," she sighed, adjusting one final strap. She climbed into the saddle and tucked her cloak around herself as well as she could. "I don't see why everyone is so hyped up."

"We've been stuck out here at headquarters for a month," Armin answered with a shrug. "Technically, everyone's break begins today."

"Not mine," Eve sighed. She reflected back to the nightmare and wondered why she still couldn't remember any details. The examination was tomorrow. She still had no details about it- not even where it was to be held.

"But today is a small break, and once you're done with the test tomorrow, you'll be allowed to return to your people."

"And what about you?" she asked as they took up their places at the rear of the formation that had just begun to move. "Where will you go for your day off?"

Armin shrugged and looked down at his horse's mane. He stroked the rough brown hair, but said nothing for a long moment. "I don't really have anywhere to go. I usually just hang out with Mikasa and Eren."

"You're welcome to come with me," Eve said with a noncommittal shrug. "I'll probably just be playing with Leonardo as much as I can. Though there might be a fight with Rosa."

"Are you sure?" Armin asked, a note of hopefulness in his voice. She glanced over at him with a slight smile. She caught his face for just a split second, noticing the wide eyes and lips slightly parted in surprise, but he dipped his head low, looking back down at his horse. "I don't want to be a burden."

"Yes, I'm sure," Eve said softly, her smile growing and softening from her usual smirk. "My people like you." Armin looked up at her once more with his own smile, bright and cheerful. They rode on with little more conversation aside from a few remarks about what they were going to purchase and where certain roads they passed led to.

They reached the city only a few hours later. Tying their horses up at the Garrison's stables, they set off on foot. Eve was instantly overwhelmed by the crowds. The dozens of soldiers that had come from headquarters vanished amongst the bodies. Paranoia made her jumpy and she flinched every time someone brushed against her. She tried to keep up with some of the others as they darted around the maze of stalls and shops, but she quickly fell behind. If it weren't for Armin, she was sure she'd have been lost. Keeping her eyes peeled, she focused on the various goods for sale as she walked, but it was hard to concentrate with the feeling of so many sets of eyes on her. She didn't fit in here, and it had become painfully obvious to her in this moment.

-0-0-0-

"Come on, Eve!" Armin shouted from a few meters ahead, waving his arm high so that she could spot him through the throng. Disgruntled and annoyed, she shoved her way through two wealthy-looking women- if their big fancy hats said anything about them at all- to make her way closer to her companion. He showed her around most of the little shops and outdoor stands that made up the market, but she hadn't found what she wanted for Leo. Armin gave her a bright smile as soon as he spotted her again. Reaching out, he grabbed her hand and tugged her along. She was tempted to break his hold, but with only a little reluctance, she grasped his hand tighter.

"Where to now?" she asked once she'd caught up. He still hadn't released her hand, but there was another portion of the thick crowd approaching. It made her less uncomfortable to hold his hand than she imagined it should have. She felt herself become less noticeable, and the sensation of paranoia began to fade. He just looked over his shoulder and winked. With a slight pout and a huff as she puffed out her cheeks, she jogged along behind him. The brisk winter air had settled more fully upon them, each of their breaths white clouds in the chill air. The simple black scarf she'd purchased just an hour ago was wrapped securely around her neck, but it did little to keep the cold from sinking down into her bones. She cursed herself internally for forgetting her only winter coat back in her village.

The cloak wrapped securely around her shoulders coupled with the thin leather jacket were keeping her from freezing, but as Armin darted around the marketplace, she kept her eye out for a coat. She'd need one before they left for her first expedition as a member of the Survey Corps. Peter had finally allowed her to resume the daily physical training, but while she was still extremely far behind the others, she didn't feel quite as depressed about it. She knew she could handle herself on the other side of the Wall. Her only concern was trying to protect the others in the squad she'd so recently been assigned to.

Alik, the young, dark-skinned boy who was supposed to be on the same level as Levi and Mikasa, was the youngest member at just fifteen. Hannah, a bright, yellow-haired girl with an annoyingly optimistic attitude, was only a year older than Alik. Usef, at seventeen, stood taller than anyone Eve had ever met before- dwarfing Eve by 60 cm (~two feet, making him just under 7 ft tall). Her squad leader, Daniel, had only been with the Corps for two years, but he was intelligent and Eve found that he didn't take offense when she challenged his decisions, only explained his reasoning behind his choices. She thought they were all nice enough, but Alik was the only one who'd ever seen a Titan before, and that had been from a distance. There was a certain uneasiness that settled in her belly each time she thought of them leaving the safety of Wall Rose.

"Look!" Armin stopped abruptly, and Eve smacked into his back. Blushing, she was about to apologize, but he pointed to the small stand to her right. Her eyes went wide and her mouth fell open a little. There were toys of all kinds spread out on the old wooden table. Eve stepped closer and her fingers instantly went to a small wooden carving of a bear.

"My husband just carved that one yesterday," the crone behind the table said with a toothless grin. Eve gave her a half smile and dipped her head in a nod. "You seem so young to be a mother- and in the Survey Corps no less!"

"He's… adopted," Eve muttered half-heartedly. She felt guilty for even saying that much. She wasn't a large part of Leo's life. Over the last week, she'd realized just how absent she'd been even in just the few short months he'd been alive. Browsing the other wares the woman had presented, Eve found another gift for Leo. It was a stuffed bear, made of soft brown canvas with black-thread lumps for eyes and a nose. She held up both objects with a small smile. "How much?"

After setting aside a large portion of her wages to go to the care for Leonardo and purchasing the scarf and toys, Eve had very little left. She didn't have a real concept for the value of money, but Armin was helping her with little notes of "too expensive" or "that's a good price". Stuffing the toys into the canvas bag at her hip (she'd found it in yet another supply closet in the castle and was told she could keep it), she let Armin grasp her icy hand once more and followed him around for a while longer.

Tomorrow was the examination. She'd learned very little of what was expected of her or what she'd actually be doing, but she wasn't worried. Perhaps it was Armin's over confidence in her, but she felt that whatever they threw at her, she could handle it. The day after, though, she would be allowed to spend with her people. Since their new village was only a few hours' ride from headquarters, she was hoping she could finagle her way into staying the night. A small, yet happy, smile crossed her face.

"You must be thinking about Leo," Armin said softly, coming to a gentler stop. She glanced up at him and nodded. "Well, let's get something to drink, shall we?" He tugged her into a small but crowded little shop that smelled like cinnamon. It was easy to spot the other soldiers present- Corps or not. She was certain that a certain crop of short black hair on a tall, stocky frame belonged to that of Oliver, one of the soldiers from Mercedes' squad. She gave him a slight wave and an even slighter smile as they passed the table he was seated at, but didn't stop to speak. Armin was ordering something for the both of them while she looked around for a table in the cramped, but warm, shop. She spotted one at the front and darted over to it to claim it as her own before someone else got to it.

"Thank you," she said softly as Armin sat a steaming mug in front of her.

He grinned. "This will warm you up." She sipped at it and sighed as the burning-hot liquid sank down into her stomach and spread through her body. "Do you like it?" At the second sip, she considered the flavor. It was sweet, almost bitter, but had a flavor of cinnamon and something else she couldn't name. After a moment, she nodded.

"I think all I need is a coat and a pair of gloves," Eve remarked. "Do you think I can get those with what I have left?"

Armin nodded. "We'll just have to look a little harder. I wouldn't worry about gloves, though. We've got some back at headquarters."

She gave him a flat sort of look. "Do you really think any of them will fit me? I'll need some made for a child…"

He chuckled and nodded. "I guess you're right. We'll see what we can find today." His cheer and good mood were infectious. She couldn't help but smile back at him just a little.

She'd often shared tea with Otho, but it had never been in such a cramped and warm place with so many unfamiliar people around. They'd rarely laughed together, and they'd never shared a lazy day strolling around a market of any sort. The thought sent a sharp pain through her chest, but she pushed it away. She was no good for Otho- nor Armin, she knew- but at least with Armin, she didn't have to worry about unfulfilled desires and promises she couldn't keep.

They did not linger in the little shop. Armin was returning the mugs while Eve waited just by the door. She was content to stare out at the people who didn't seem to see her at all. Not having angry stares and unspoken demands glaring her down at every turn was a nice change of pace. She'd thought, once, that she'd hate being among so many unfamiliar faces. Chuckling at how wrong she'd been, she glanced over her shoulder at Armin. He was pushing through a group of six or seven giggling girls dressed in richly colored furs. Her gaze wandered back out to the street.

Eyes lighting on a short dark-skinned figure, she frowned. His black hair was a little too long, brushing the tops of his ears in tight curls. The way his black eyes were narrowed, cutting into everything around him with a certain sharpness, belied the smile plastered on his long, narrow face. She shoved her way forward, feeling Armin's fingers just miss her own. Ignoring his calls, she darted through the street. She had to know…

"Aldrich?"

The figure stopped and half-turned to look at her. She felt her entire body go rigid. Her jaw clenched and her fists tightened at her sides. She went to take a step forward, but he spun on his toes and ran, slipping down a narrow alley. She shot after him, not caring if Armin was following her or not, though almost certain he was. Adrenaline was pumping hard through her veins, pushing her faster. Her fingers reached out, latching on to the dark green wool coat on his back. In a lightning-fast move, he'd slipped out of it and kept running.

Unable to keep up, Eve slowed, panting hard. She stared after him, watching his back until he vanished into another crowd. The coat was still in her hands. She looked down at it and shoved her hands into the pockets, looking for any sign or clue as to what he was doing.

"Eve!" Armin shouted. She turned slowly, her hands shaking. "What's wrong? Who was that?"

"That…" She paused and took a deep breath. "I watched him die… It was Aldrich, though. I _know_ it. I watched him _die_, Armin! How can he still be alive?" She was scared for a moment, terrified by Aldrich's appearance. She looked to Armin and she knew he could see her fear.

"Maybe… maybe it wasn't him," Armin suggested softly. She studied his face, holding herself back from snapping and yelling at him. There was confusion in his soft blue eyes and the way his brows pulled together. His hands were in front of him, raised just slightly. It wasn't an overtly obvious position, but he was on the defensive.

With a heavy sigh, she shoved her hand into another pocket on the coat, coming out with only a small canvas purse full of coins. With a smirk, she tossed the coat into the muddy alley and tied the little purse to her belt. "You're right." She had to pretend that it wasn't him. She had to convince herself that he'd just been someone who looked like Aldrich. "Ghosts don't go to the market."

Armin seemed to relax some, but he was still eyeing her with uncertainty. "Eve…"

"Don't worry about it," she shot with a little too much sharpness in her tone. She sighed and brushed a few strands of hair that had come loose from her braid out of her face. "I'm sorry. I must have mistook him for Aldrich…" She had to pretend that was the truth. She had to make herself believe those words. If not, she'd go crazy.

"Who's Aldrich?" Armin asked. She stepped around him and rejoined the crowd. He fell into step beside her, but did not reach out for her hand.

"An old friend…" she muttered. "He's the one who saved my family from the Titans when Wall Maria fell. I learned almost everything I know from him. He'd been in the Garrison for a couple of years, but he was already a squad leader. I watched him die. He was eaten by a Titan. Christophe had to pull me away from it… I was cutting it open, trying to save him. I had all of these blisters…" Armin remained silent for a long moment. "But he's dead. Has been for years."

They continued walking through the crowded streets. Eve's eyes were peeled for another sign of her ghost, but she knew she wouldn't see him again. It was almost impossible to keep him out of her mind, but she had to try. Aldrich couldn't be alive. She'd carved open the belly of a Titan to try to save him. He was _dead_. Thinking he was alive would only drive her crazy, and she knew she didn't need that headache- not before her examination, and not before she went to reconcile one last time with her people before she left on the expedition.

But then… who was that man? Why did he look so much like Aldrich? What made him answer to that name? Why had he run? She ground her teeth together. If that really had been Aldrich, then why was he behind Wall Rose? What was he doing here? Had he known they were all behind the Wall?

A sinking feeling settled into the pit of her stomach, but she blamed it on her paranoia and tried to redouble her focus on finding a coat and a pair of gloves. Armin was as helpful as always, and the money she'd outright stolen from the man she'd thought was Aldrich helped her to pay for the things she needed. After she'd slipped into the thick black wool that was a little too roomy, she thought about how Armin hadn't said a word about keeping the little purse. With the remainder, she bought a small notepad and a set of pencils to carry with her on the trip. The paper was the most expensive thing she'd bought all day, but she just hoped she could find something pretty enough to draw for Leo.

They headed back to headquarters alone. Everyone else had either gone to be with their families, returned earlier, or were staying for a few more hours. She had no desire to remain in that crowd. All she could do was search the faces for Aldrich. Her stomach was wound into tight knots of anxiety that did not begin to fade until they were nearly back at the castle that served as their headquarters and barracks.

* * *

Dinner was quiet. The majority of the Corps had gone to where ever they called home. Eve, Armin, Mikasa, Eren, the Captain, and a half dozen other soldiers whose names Eve couldn't remember were the only bodies seated at the dinner tables. With the events of the day combining with her anxiety for tomorrow, Eve had little appetite. As soon as Levi was done eating, she accosted him, determined to get some answers.

"What?" Levi snapped as soon as she was within arm's reach. Eve's scowl formed and remained in place.

"Where am I going for that exam tomorrow? When is it? You haven't told me anything about it." She darted in front of him to cut him off. He didn't stop, just sidestepped her and kept walking. She sucked her teeth, annoyed, but kept pace with him.

"As far as I know, you're to report to Klorva at oh-nine hundred," he grunted. "They'll explain everything else when you get there."

"That's it?" Eve demanded, grabbing his shoulder and forcing him to spin to look at her. He lashed out with his fist, but she ducked under it and rolled her eyes as she straightened. "You're just going to throw me to the fucking wolves?"

"How am I supposed to know how they're going to test you?" Levi clipped, stepping away from her. The way his fists clenched and his posture tightened did not escape her. Whatever was eating at him didn't have anything to do with her, but she was aware enough to realize that her presence was only pissing him off further. He'd moved just far enough away so that he couldn't quite reach her. "Haven't you learned anything here? Figure it out on your own!"

Eve stopped and he stomped away again. "I don't know what crawled up his ass and died, but he seriously needs to do some excavating." She heard a chuckle and spun on her heal. Armin was standing with a bowl in his hands.

"You didn't eat anything earlier," he said, holding out the clay dish full of a thick soup. She wanted to tell him no and shove him away, but with the coming test of her skills, she knew she'd regret not eating later. "You have to be in Klorva at nine?"

"Yeah," Eve sighed, plopping down on the closest bench. Armin passed her the bowl and she accepted it. "I don't even know how far away that is or how to get there… Where can I find a map?"

"You really think we're gonna let the new girl go galavantin' all over the countryside on her own?" Eve smirked and turned her head to look at Peter. He was grinning with his hands on his hips. "No way! I'm comin' with ya. Their medics will probably have their hands full already, so I volunteered to help out."

"You just want to be there to gloat if I end up chopping off one of my legs," Eve remarked after swallowing her first mouthful of soup. Peter shrugged and sat on her left as Armin took the place at her right.

"True enough," Peter grinned. "Wanna come, Arlert? You won't be able to watch, but I'm sure they won't mind you waiting back at the barracks. Alois goes first, then Eve- just to make it fair."

"Where is Alois, anyway?" Eve asked. "I haven't seen him all day…"

"In the stables," Armin piped up. "I spotted him riding in just a moment ago." Eve dipped her head in a single nod, but all of her focus was on the mushy carrots and smashed peas in the soup. It didn't taste very good, but it was food. "I'm sure he'll do fine."

Eve allowed her smirk to form for just a brief moment. She thought it was uncanny how Armin knew what she was thinking so often. "I know." She did have confidence in Alois doing fine on the exam, but she was worried about the possibility of injury. Whatever sort of test it was going to be, she knew that it would be physical.

"Well, Marks, Arlert, you two should get to bed," Peter said, standing back up. "I'm getting my things together tonight. We leave before dawn." Eve groaned a little, but nodded. At least she had a proper winter coat to keep her warm.

"My room is empty tonight," Eve sighed. She shoveled another spoonful of soup into her mouth, then turned to Armin. "Make sure I'm awake, alright? Sasha usually gets me up…"

Armin blushed a little and dipped his head low. "I can't," he muttered. "We aren't allowed in the girls' barracks."

Eve rolled her eyes and scoffed. "In case you haven't noticed, there isn't exactly anyone around to punish you- much less care." She elbowed his arm lightly, her smirk growing. Armin sort of shrugged, but he still wouldn't really look at her. "Fine then, I guess that just means I'll be borrowing a bunk in your room tonight."

His head snapped up and she laughed openly as the flush crept up his neck and joined with that on his cheeks, turning him almost entirely tomato red. "W-why?"

"Because I won't wake up in time otherwise, and sleeping in a real bed sounds better than sleeping on one of those damn cots in the infirmary. Not to mention, if I sleep down there and Peter wakes me up, we will probably lose our field medic." Armin looked a little confused. "I'll kill him because he'll do something stupid."

"Oh," Armin muttered. She could tell he was still stuck on her announcement at sleeping in his room; it was hilarious. His innocence was cute and a little refreshing compared to everything she'd lived with back in her own village.

She stood and grabbed the mostly-empty bowl. "I'm going to shower and pack," she stated. "I'll find your room when I'm done." She left him with a smirk that was a little too mean-spirited. It was entirely too much fun to tease him, though, and she didn't regret it.

* * *

**A/N**: This chapter feels a little rough and choppy to me, so I apologize if anything doesn't really flow.

I hope you enjoyed my Eve/Armin shipping going on! It's so much fun to write...

Please review! It really does mean the world to me.

Also- I really love character discussions, so if there's something you'd like to ask about, please feel free!


	9. Trial

Chapter Nine: Trial

* * *

"Eve?" She groaned and rolled over, pulling the thin sheet over her head. "Come on, we need to get going." Muttering dark expletives under her breath, she buried herself deeper into the pillows at her head. She felt a light touch on her shoulder, then the full palm, and finally Armin was shaking her slightly.

"Five more minutes," she mumbled.

"You said that last time," Armin shot back. Suddenly, the sheet was snatched away from her. She bolted upright and tugged the sheet back up, covering her bare legs. Turning her head to the side, she opened her mouth to yell.

"Time to get up!" Peter said with a cheerful grin. Narrowing her eyes, she balled up her fist and punched him hard in the stomach. He grunted and took a few steps back. "What was that for?"

"I could have been naked!" Eve protested.

Peter just laughed. "In Armin's room? Yeah right."

An idea struck her, and in a flash, she grasped the front of Armin's shirt and pulled him down into the bed beside her, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and cozying up to his side. "How do you know?" she challenged in a sultry whisper. She could feel Armin's ridged posture beside her and his slight shaking as she imagined he debated remaining in place or bolting.

Peter raised one eyebrow at the two of them, then shrugged. "Doesn't matter anyway. I've seen you naked before- well, mostly."

Eve's expression fell flat and she dropped her arm from around Armin's shoulders. He stood as quickly as he could, but he didn't move very far from the edge of the bed. "Taking care of my broken ribs hardly counts," she retorted, climbing to her knees. The faded and slightly holey nightshirt fell to the middle of her thighs. Peter took a few more steps back as she climbed off of the lower bunk. "Now get out so I can get dressed."

"Yeah, yeah," Peter grumbled, rubbing the back of his head. "Hurry it up, would ya? Alois is already downstairs waiting. He was kind enough to agree to get our horses ready while we woke you up."

Eve grabbed one of the pillows from the bed and tossed it at Peter, hitting him squarely in the face. He grabbed it before it could hit the floor and threw it back at her, but she caught it. "Get out," Eve stated again. Armin slipped out of the door first, and Peter followed with a slow saunter that only served to further irritate her.

Eve dressed in layers, anticipating the cold before she even discovered the light dusting of snow on the ground. She complained silently to herself as she walked out to the stables with Armin and Peter, joining Alois. The younger man had readied all four horses and was standing beside his own, stroking her mane.

"'Morning," Eve greeted. She was still walking on eggshells around Alois. She did not have the authority she'd had back in their village; they were equals now, and she wanted to show him that she was indeed capable of thinking of him as her equal. "Thank you for getting Osten ready to go."

"I know how you are in the morning," Alois replied with a half-smirk. Eve returned the expression. She realized with a sharp, if brief, pang of guilt that he'd picked up on many of her mannerisms over the years. That smirk was one of them. The trait wasn't even originally her own. She'd taken it from Aldrich. It was mildly amusing to her how even such a simple expression could be traced back through painful memories to a time that had been both easier and more difficult for the both of them. "Are you finally ready?"

Eve nodded and they all mounted their horses. "Nervous?" she asked.

Alois just shrugged. "It can't be harder than facing down real Titans, can it? I mean, we've got years of experience to go on… Think you can keep up?"

Eve chuckled humorlessly. "Who knows? I'm still not back to normal, but I think I'll manage." Alois glanced over his shoulder at her with a slight frown, but she chose not to comment. It was one thing for him to see her struggling with physical training every day, but it was something else entirely for her to openly discuss it. She'd always kept her shortcomings to herself back in the village, but that had been to protect the others, not herself. Eve could only hope that Alois was finally starting to understand that. Now that the burden for the care of her village did not rest solely on her own shoulders, she was willing to abandon her former practices. He needed to take on some of the responsibility for himself.

They were mostly silent on the dark, freezing ride to Klorva. She was sure, despite Alois' words, that his anxiety was growing just like her own. Today they would either ensure the peaceful existence of their people or they would doom everyone to return to the village outside of Wall Rose. It wasn't a permanent solution, but it would keep everyone safe for at least as long as they were gone on the next expedition. Today she would either become a true soldier, or she would be condemned as a silly little girl who enjoyed playing the part of Titan-killer.

* * *

"Man, I haven't been back here in years," Peter remarked with a slight sag of his shoulders. Eve raised one eyebrow at the tall man beside her. He shot her a sheepish grin and rubbed the back of his head. "I graduated from the Western Division. 'Course, most of my friends either went to the Garrison and are up North right now, or they're dead." She understood all too well, and didn't bother with a comment of sympathy.

"I've only ever passed through Klorva on a few occasions," Armin said softly. "I don't know the way to the barracks."

"Not a problem," Peter said, grin returning. He trotted to the front of the little group and led the way down the nearly-empty street. They rode around the outer edge of the city, never entering it. The barracks were located only a few kilometers away from the main road. Eve's anxiety was beginning to get the better of her, and her hands shook as she clenched Osten's reins.

"This reminds me of Trost," Armin muttered softly to himself. Eve noticed the look of sad memories drifting through his mind in the way that his eyes were half-lidded and from the small smile that didn't so much stretch his lips across his face, just sort of turned up a little at the corners.

"I think they're all pretty much the same," Peter said with a shrug. "Anyway, here we are." They stopped short at a long, if narrow, building and Peter's boots raised small clouds of powdery white snow when he hit the ground. Everyone else followed suit, though they only tied their horses to a few spare posts. Eve saw no stables.

"Good morning." Eve, Alois, Armin, and Peter all snapped to attention with perfect salutes. Eve was still having a difficult time remembering when a salute was necessary, but she'd managed so far by looking at those around her for guidance. "You must be the two new Survey Corps' victims." Eve felt a humorless smile cross her face and she nodded. "I won't waste your time. I believe you're first, young man." He looked to Alois and the young blond nodded once.

"Yes Sir."

"Well don't just stand there, get back on that horse and let's get going." Alois reacted quickly to the man's words, but Eve found herself souring towards him. She tried to keep in mind that he was used to dishing out orders to new recruits, but she and Alois were seasoned veterans compared to the children he dealt with on a daily basis.

She watched as the man mounted another horse tied to a pole around the side of the building. He and Alois were off, with no other followers. She frowned to herself, wondering what sort of test Alois was going to be put through with only a single Commander with him. Armin nudged her shoulder and she snapped out of her reverie, following her two remaining companions inside the warm barracks.

A kettle with boiling water and a placement of cups and tea leaves had been left for them, but otherwise, they were alone. Eve accepted a cup from Armin, but she did little more than sit and stare into the murky brown liquid for the next hour. Her stomach had twisted itself into knots, and she was grateful she'd skipped breakfast. If she hadn't, she was certain that all of it would have found its way to the floor.

At long last, a group of young cadets entered the little dining area. Eve and Peter left Armin behind and set off after another cadet to the place where Eve's examination was to be held.

* * *

She shrugged her new coat off and tossed it over Osten's saddle. The little satchel at her waist followed suit, but she kept the thin gloves on for protection against the falling snow. There were ten others before her, the top-ranking graduates from the Western Division of the 106th trainees. They were all just kids- none older than seventeen, but most topping out at fifteen. A certain amount of regret for them chewed at her insides, but she didn't let it show. Her expression was flat and calm, remaining as blank as she could manage.

"Miss Marks." She turned to General Pixis and gave him a proper salute. The Commander from before was nowhere to be found. It was one of the very first things she'd learned, and one of the few things she absolutely despised doing. She never gave a salute to Levi or Erwin, even if she did respect them a degree or two more than she had before. Everything she did today, though, would be tested. She was sure of that. Levi had provided her with few details, just that she'd be told what to do once she got there.

"Good morning," she greeted, her lips pressing tightly together as soon as the words were spoken. She was trying her hardest to keep herself calm and in control. That was a difficult task when all she wanted was to smack the falsely pleasant smile right off of the General's face.

"I'd like you to meet these fine young soldiers," he said, gesturing to those behind him, lined up perfectly and at-ease. "They've already successfully completed their own examinations, so they will not be graded twice. These few are the top ten graduates in their class. You will be judged based on your performance as compared to theirs." She gritted her teeth. She was supposed to go up against the best of the best amongst over one hundred trainees? Killing Titans was one thing, but this was something else entirely.

"What exactly will I be doing, Sir?" Taking a deep breath, she calmed herself once more. It had taken every ounce of self-control she possessed to keep herself from sarcasm. She had no respect for this man. In fact, all she had for the old codger was disdain.

He gave a little chuckle. "There are fourteen dummies set up throughout a vigorous course. Your goal is to at least hit each target, but getting to the targets first will be to your advantage. Surviving is the second goal." Her eyes narrowed at him, his words giving her the strong impression that she would be sabotaged. "You begin just over here." He pointed to an open spot in the trees behind him.

"When do we begin?" She was anxious, her fingers digging into her palms through the thin gloves, then releasing once more.

"I'll give you a head start of five seconds," Pixis said with the smile that grated on her nerves and buried under her skin like a nasty infection. "You may begin whenever you'd like."

Without a second thought, she sprinted for the trees, then engaged the three-dimensional maneuvering gear. She flew through the air as fast as she could, the bitter cold wind biting through her skin. She saw the first target and flipped in a tight circle, gouging out two deep pieces of the fake flesh. Her gaze and attention were focused solely on the trees and searching for targets. She nailed the second one with just as much ease as the first. Zipping through the trees at her top-speed, she knew this was going to be her singular advantage. She lacked stamina, so the faster she completed this exam, the better off she would be.

One of her lines snapped free. She felt the jerk in her balance, but corrected it swiftly, retracting the spike and sending it flying once more without halting. Her eyes were too busy hunting for the dummies to look back. She wasn't sure if the break had been a natural occurrence, or if someone had done it intentionally. She cursed when she saw the flash of a dark gray cloak before her, hitting her target. She pushed herself faster, slicing into the dummy before cutting sharply to her left to aim for the next one.

She felt unbalanced once more, but then she was free-falling to the ground just a short distance below. Her toes grazed the snow-dusted ground just before the steel cables shot her back up into the air. She tucked her limbs in and launched herself forward- faster than she ever remembered going before. Her blades sliced into the next dummy. The cuts weren't quite deep enough, but they did the trick well enough.

She felt a sting on the back of her neck, but didn't realize what was going on until her head was jerked to the right. Shrieking, she reacted without thinking, one of her blades swinging up to the cable at the base of her neck. Adrenaline took over her actions, driving her to move the blade at an awkward angle. She could see bits of her auburn hair drifting on the air around her, dark strands of red mingling with the white flakes of snow. Her body shot forward once more, her cables once again engaged and sinking deep into branches and tree trunks.

Three more dummies, all in an odd cluster. She nailed the first two before the others around her, but was third on the last one. She moved on, swinging by the gray streak in front of her, then slicing up yet another dummy. She slammed the spent blades into the sheaths at her sides, her right hand going to the left sheath and her left hand going to the right sheath. Attaching new blades with a well-practiced swiftness, she had them back out and ready to go just in time for the next dummy.

Her cable shot out, aiming for another tree. Instead, one of the gray blobs caught it. The shriek made Eve falter. She used the other single cable to swing forward, shoving the left blade into its sheath as she reached out with one hand to grab the falling graduate. She landed on a branch, tossing the young person against the trunk.

"Fuck!" Eve shouted, her hands hovering over where the spike from her gear had sliced clean through the girl's calf. Her mind racing, she snatched off her belt and lifted the screaming girl's leg, tightening the leather as well as she could before tying it off. Her fingers worked quickly, releasing the cable from the spike, snatching the cable out of the girl's leg, and reattaching it to the spike. "Stay there!" She gave her command as she darted off again, unable to do anything further for the girl without utterly failing the exam.

Pushing herself harder and faster, she reached the next dummy and noticed several cuts. She made her own mark, then continued on, passing more blobs as she flew through the trees. Her body was screaming in protest at her, warning her of her coming limit. By her count, there were only four targets left. She hit the next two, noticing there were fewer cuts each time. The next to the last target neared, and she was the second, but the final target was all hers. After her claim, she dropped lower to avoid the others coming at her, and headed back through the trees, hunting for the girl she'd left behind. Without the distraction of targets or keeping up with the other blurs of gray, she made it to the whimpering girl with ease.

"Come here," Eve said softly, crouching on the branch in front of the girl. Eve slid forward, spun around, and grabbed her arms, wrapping them around her own neck. "Hold on tight." She felt the girl nod once, then shot back into the air, getting to the end of the course as quickly as she could manage with the extra weight and her nearly-drained body. When, at last, she hit the ground on the other side of the trees, she collapsed to her knees, and the girl on her back fell to the ground beside her. Panting, but unable to stop yet, Eve checked the belt on the girl's leg before grabbing her cloak and shoving it down on her leg, pressing hard. The hole was still bleeding too much.

"Hey, that's enough!" Eve glanced to her left and found, to her great surprise, Peter. He and two others had run over with a gurney. "Let them take her!" Eve nodded and fell to her back in the snow, gasping for breath.

"Fuck," she panted. "How did I do?" She opened one eye to gaze up at Peter. He was frowning down at her. "What?"

"Sit up," he said. She held up one hand and he grasped it, jerking her upright. She bent her knees and crossed her arms over them, resting her head on her arms. It took a few moments, but her breathing slowed with her heart-rate. "Your hair…" She felt his fingers grazing the back of her neck, then the familiar sting of a rag covered in alcohol.

She reached up with one hand and found the shorn ends of her hair. It was only a few centimeters long at the back of her head, but fell much longer around her ears. She chuckled. "Shit."

"You're lucky you didn't break your neck with that stunt!" Peter shouted at her. She just gave another breathless laugh. "Ya did everythin' right, though."

"My score?" she asked impatiently. He pulled the alcohol-drenched cloth from the back of her neck and she looked up at him. Her eyes narrowed. Pixis was standing over Peter's shoulder.

"You pass," Pixis said with a wrinkle-filled smile. "I'm quite impressed, Miss Marks. Well done."

Eve took a deep breath as soon as he turned on his heel to stalk away. "Fuck you, jackass," she whispered under her breath. Peter smacked her once on the back of her head. "_What_?"

"Watch what you say!" Peter scolded. "Anyway," he stood up and brushed the snow from his pants, "you're fine. Can you stand?" With a nod, she clamored to her feet on her own, ignoring Peter's offered hand. He nodded to her left and she gazed out at the group of graduates. "Looks like you've just earned yourself a few new fans."

"Yeah," Eve muttered darkly, shrugging one shoulder. "Can I go now?" Peter shrugged himself, but they walked together towards the graduates. She looked out at their faces, some hard with lines of envy, others soft with wonder. "Is there anything else I need to do here?"

"You're one of those people who came from the other side of the Wall, right?" one of the girls asked. Eve nodded once. "The other boy, Alois, he did okay, but you… How do you move so fast?" Eve shrugged, but was glad to know that Alois' exam had gone well. He'd begun to warm back up to her gradually in the last couple of days, but she wasn't able to see him before he left for his exam. She had no idea where he was now.

"Where is Alois?" she asked.

"Back at the barracks," a boy answered, pointing to Eve's left. "Come on, we'll show you the way." She and Peter fell behind the younger ones, but she could tell they wanted to surround her and ask her all sorts of questions. Whatever it was in her expression that kept people away also held the graduates at bay, and she was never more grateful. Her legs and arms felt like jelly as she walked. More than once, Peter had to grab her arm to keep her on her feet. She blamed the snow, but they both knew that wasn't the case.

She was helped onto her horse by Peter, and then they rode the short distance back to the barracks where she'd spent a single long hour dreading what she'd just accomplished. There were dozens of other cadets present, with many of the girls surrounding Alois. Eve couldn't help but chuckle as he tried to explain to several of them that he had a fiancée.

"Eve!" Armin choked out, a look of despair on his face. "Your hair..." She reached up and touched the short frayed ends, brushing a few more loose strands away.

"Didn't have a choice," she said with a light shrug. "I knew I should have cut it off..."

"I...I'm sorry," Armin muttered, looking down at the ground.

She sighed and turned her attention to Alois. It was just hair, after all. "How'd you do?" Eve asked, still sitting atop Osten. Alois looked up at her with a grin, and she knew he'd passed. "Me too. We're officially soldiers now."

"Dogs of the military until the day we die," Alois agreed, mimicking Aldrich's old words of sarcastic sentiment. "I don't think there's anything else we have to do here."

"Nope, you guys are free to go for the next day and a half," Peter said with a grin. "I trust you can find your way back?" Eve nodded once. "Great. I'm going to go see if I can't track down a few old friends…" Alois slipped away from the gaggle of giggling girls and swiftly seated himself in his saddle.

"Let's go see our people," Eve said with a soft smile. Alois nodded. She gave Armin one quick glance and found him appearing just as ready to leave as she was. With a single nod, they all raced off, galloping at top speed. She could feel Osten's joy in his light jumps and quick pace- he was happy to be free to run once more. She stroked his mane, thinking about how much running they'd probably be doing once they left Wall Rose. At least, she thought grimly, her horse wouldn't get tired as quickly as she did.

"Mina's going to have plenty of practice raising a child by the time you two have one!" Eve teased Alois to her right. He blushed, but nodded. "You two should get busy! Leo needs a friend his own age."

"H-hey!" Alois stuttered. "We aren't even technically married yet!"

"And?" Eve asked, shrugging one shoulder. "Annalise and Leon weren't _technically_ married either. Sure, we had the ceremony, but there was nothing official about it."

"Still!" Alois continued with his protest. "Maybe once we get back I get her a nice ring and a dress…"

"That's the spirit!" Eve cheered. "We need something to look forward to. Doc can do the ceremony like he did for Annalise and Leon."

"And you know you'll have to give Mina away," Alois shot back at her. Eve paled at the thought and Alois laughed. "Who else is going to do it? You're perfect!"

"I can't wear a dress," Eve grumbled.

"We'll figure something out," Alois teased. "At least this gives us something to talk about while we're out there." She gave him a kind smile and nodded. It was their tradition to have a single topic to discuss whenever they rode out together. They wouldn't be in the same squad, so there would be little opportunity while they were riding to talk, but she knew that during their downtime, they could get a short conversation in. She smiled out at the horizon, grateful that the tension between her and Alois had finally fallen away.

* * *

A/N: So this one is a bit short, but I hope you liked it!


	10. Tribulation

Chapter Ten, Part I: Tribulation

* * *

I have borrowed the character Mercedes Carello, featured in _The Jaguar_ and _The Burning Titan_ (parts I and II) by MercedesCarello. I am ever so grateful!

* * *

Alois and Eve raced back to the village, leaving Armin to bring in the rear, but he didn't mind. It was nice, watching them have so much fun- especially after Alois had been at Eve's throat for so long. He still wasn't entirely sure what the actual argument had been about, only that Alois was angry with her for keeping secrets. He was a little worried about going to the village with them. What sort of fighting would break out this time? He hadn't heard much of the conversation last time, but he did know the situation had been hard on Eve. He was reluctant to watch that happen once more.

Eve was the winner of the little race. As soon as she'd hopped down on the ground near the stables, she found her horse an apple for his victory treat. Armin found it odd that no one had come to greet them. They set about removing the saddles from their horses and brushing them down before releasing them into the small coral. Eve wasn't quite all smiles, but she did appear to be in a good mood. Her primary expression alternated between a soft smile and her typical half-smirk. The temptation to ask her what she found funny was difficult to resist.

"Where is everyone?" Alois asked, bringing up the question Armin wanted to ask himself. "I thought Mina would be over here by now…"

"Now that you mention it," Eve remarked, her smirk falling away, "I didn't see those Garrison soldiers around either. Something is wrong." Armin felt the same sinking in his stomach that he imagined Eve was feeling. Leaving their bags at the stables, they all jogged over to the nearby village. Farther down the packed dirt road, there was a small group of people. He recognized Mercedes standing in the center, her boot crushing the face of a tall, dark-skinned man into the dirt while she held his hands high behind his back. Christophe and Doc were both there, along with Mina, but they didn't look like they were trying to make her stop.

Christophe, facing their direction, was the first to notice them. "Eve!" He waved them over and Eve picked up her pace to a sprint. He and Alois followed only seconds behind. When he reached the small group, he stared hard at the man on the ground. It was the same man Eve had chased through the market.

"Let me go!" he was demanding from the ground.

"Not until you explain what you are doing here!" Mercedes shouted down at him, jerking his arms higher in the air and making him grunt in pain. "This entire area is restricted!"

"How was I supposed to know that?" he protested.

Eve tapped Mercedes on the shoulder. "Thanks," the shorter woman said softly. Mercedes just nodded once, watching in as much confusion as Armin himself was in. Eve crouched on the ground by the man's face. "Good to see you again, Aldrich. Why'd you run yesterday?"

"Didn't expect to see your skinny ass still alive," the man shot back with the same smirk Eve always wore. "Guess the Titan's don't like skin and bones." To Armin's great surprise, her fist shot out, clipping his cheek and forcing his face into the dirt.

"Why are you here?" she asked. Her tone was calm, but it wasn't difficult to detect the strain that kept it that way.

Armin glanced over at the others. Mina, Alois, Doc, and Christophe all wore varying expressions of shock, although Christophe looked angrier than the other two, and Mina looked close to tears. Alois hadn't moved or said a word, which worried him slightly. From what Armin had picked up on, Alois was usually quick to react; total shock wasn't something Armin related back to him. Doc just looked betrayed, his now-shaven cheeks sagging in a heavy frown and his thick white eyebrows almost covering his eyes.

"I can't visit my own people?" Aldrich grumbled. "'Least someone taught you how to throw a punch."

"You can thank Christophe for that," Eve responded. "You didn't show up here after all these years just for a visit." As if reading Eve's thoughts, Mercedes pressed her boot harder into his head. "Don't make me ask you again."

"Look who grew a set of balls!" the man teased with a loud laugh. "You let me up and I just might talk to you."

"Oh, that's not going to happen," Mercedes answered. "You're staying right here until my people get back with the Military Police."

Eve glanced up at Mercedes, her expression grim. "I owe you for this," she said. "I chased after him yesterday, but he managed to get away from me. Eve stood up and rubbed the back of her head. He could see from her small, annoyed frown that she'd expected her braid. Instead, she found her nearly-shorn scalp.

"Eve…" Christophe had stepped closer to her, placing one hand on her shoulder. "What is going on?"

"I saw Aldrich yesterday in the market," she said with an angry shrug, jerking away from his hand. "I chased after him, but he managed to slip away from me."

"I thought he was dead," Alois stated, stepping closer.

"I watched him get eaten!" Eve snapped. She held out both of her hands. "Don't you remember my hands and arms being blistered? I tried to cut him out of the Titan!"

"Of course I remember!" Alois shouted back. "Everyone was freaked out for weeks!"

"How is this possible?" Doc asked in a raspy whisper.

"Exactly what I'd like to know," Eve growled, turning her head to glare down at the man still face-down in the dirt. "I never thought I'd have to treat my mentor as an enemy."

"You're the one who brought everyone behind the Wall!" Aldrich shouted up at her. His eyes were narrowed and he spat into the dirt at Eve's feet. "I haven't seen Micah anywhere. What the fuck happened to him?"

"Micah's dead," Alois stated flatly. Armin watched in silence as Alois crouched down in front of Aldrich- only just out of arms' reach. "He died after he led a large group to Wall Rose. We thought he was trying to get us all in, but that turned out to be a lie."

Aldrich barked out a single laugh. "Let me guess, that idiot didn't tell you guys anything, did he?"

"What are you talking about?" Christophe shouted, stepping closer to Aldrich, his fists balled and held up, ready to fight.

"Nothing that concerns you," Aldrich snapped. Mercedes dug her boot into his face and he groaned, trying to wriggle away.

"I think it does concern us, and you need to explain." Eve's frown seemed cemented into place, as if she'd never worn any other expression. The wrinkles around her mouth, eyes, and the bridge of her nose were deep and seemed more in place than the faint smile or silly grin from just a few minutes ago. Armin's mind was racing with the possibilities, and he didn't like anything he came up with.

"No, thanks," Aldrich grunted. "I'd rather die."

"You're one of _them_, aren't you?" It was surprising to hear the accusation come from Alois and not Eve. When Armin looked over at her, though, he just found pain and sadness buried in the wrinkles from her angry frown.

The way the man's dark eyes closed and his eyebrows knitted together spoke volumes to Armin. It wasn't hard to guess that the man was also a Titan-shifter, but he hadn't transformed and seemed to have no desire to do so. Who was he working for, though? What secret was so important that his life was worth sacrificing?

When no answer came, Eve took one step forward. He anticipated her move just before she made it, and stopped her with one hand on her shoulder. Eve's normally bright green eyes sliced into him with a certain darkness that made him shudder. "Remember what I told you about Annie?" Considering his story about how his friend had encased herself in that impenetrable shell rather than let herself be taken alive, Eve nodded once.

"Micah knew all about you, didn't he?" Christophe accused. He fell to his knees in the snow beside Aldrich's head. The one eating snow didn't answer. "How could you do this to me? I thought… I thought you were my friend."

"Being your friend had nothing to do with it," Aldrich spat. "Micah was the leader- he knew how to make the decisions that were best for the village!"

"It was his decision to go to Wall Rose in the first place!" Christophe roared. "He led all those people to their deaths."

"It was all necessary." Aldrich was struggling against Mercedes' hold again, working on his arms this time. She stretched his arms higher, his shoulders bending back with the force.

"Necessary for _what_?" Alois looked up at Doc. The gray man had tears in his eyes. "What would possess you to do this to me? To your mother? We were devastated the day you died!"

"I didn't have a choice," Aldrich insisted.

"A choice about what?" Christophe asked tightly, his body shaking. "About abandoning us all? About keeping so many secrets? About coming _back_?"

Aldrich did not answer. His eyes were focused on the snow, and Armin could see him thinking hard about something. It was nerve-wracking, watching all of these people worry about this man who was supposed to be dead- the man who was a Titan-shifter that no one knew about.

"I guess we should be lucky that you haven't transformed and tried to kill us all," Eve spat down at Aldrich, her voice full of contempt. "You disgust me."

"And you're a fucking idiot!" Aldrich yelled up at her. "How could you bring them all here? You should have just stayed in the village!"

"Our people were dying!" Eve screamed back, throwing out one hand as a gesture to Christophe, Doc, and Mina. "I did what I thought was best for them!"

Aldrich struggled against Mercedes' boot and hold, but only managed to melt a little more of the snow around him. "I taught you everything you needed to know about staying alive _out there_! Now everything we worked so hard for is pointless!"

"What were you working for?" Armin asked. He wanted answers just as much as Eve and Alois, but he _needed_ to know who Aldrich was working for. If he knew that, then maybe he could figure out a way to save Annie…

"Nothing that concerns you," the man bit back. "Now let me go!"

His eyes widened as he watched the glint of thought flash over Aldrich's eyes. In one swift move, Aldrich snatched his arm to the side. Mercedes was jerked to the side with the movement, losing her grip on his arms and her boot leaving his head to thump into the snow so that she could remain on her feet. The sickening crunch was followed by a split second of silence, and then the crack of thunder that he'd come to associate with Eren's transformations. They were all blown backwards by the force of the steam. He lost sight of everyone else for several long seconds, but managed to look up at the Titan that had appeared before them.

It wasn't very tall- maybe only a seven-meter class, but it was burly- nearly as wide as it was tall with arms that fell down the ground and ended in fists at least two meters across. Its eyes were little more than dark slits set far apart in the wide face. It opened its mouth, letting out a long and tortured-sounding scream. It wasn't full of rage like Eren's were- this one felt like an ancient sadness. Only a moment later, two dark and swift blots- Eve and Mercedes, he assumed- spun out of the steam, slicing into various locations- including the back of its neck. It fell in a loud thump before it could so much as lift one arm to defend itself.

"Alois!" Eve shouted. Fresh clouds of steam from the now-disintegrating body of the Titan that was once Aldrich had clouded the air again.

"Over here!" he heard Alois answer from an undetermined distance to his left. "I got Mina. Where's Doc and Christophe?"

"We're alright," Christophe shouted back, also from the left but a little farther away.

"What the fuck was all that about?" Mercedes was demanding. Armin took a deep breath and huffed as he ran blindly for where he thought Eve was. When she became visible, Mercedes was still on the defensive, but her swords were pointed at Eve.

"Stop!" he shouted. His mind raced with something else to back up that statement, but all he could come up with was the absolute worst possible contingency. "We don't know that he's dead."

"He is." Eve stood straight and turned slightly. There was a wide splatter of blood covering most of her left side. She held Aldrich's head by the hair in her left hand. "I doubt he can regenerate without this."

"So he was part of your village and you thought he died, but he turned out to be a Titan-shifter?" Mercedes questioned, sounding sarcastic and bitter.

"That's what it looks like," Eve snapped back at her. "I don't understand any of this! I didn't even know people could turn into Titans until they told me about Eren Yeager. Now one of my own people turns out to be one!" She tossed Aldrich's head angrily to the ground. It rolled through the snow, leaving a red smear of blood as it went.

"Are the Military Police really on their way?" Armin asked. He was reluctant to have them show up. That meant explanations and more trouble for Eve and her people. If word got out that one of the people from Eve's village that was believe to be dead turned out to be a Titan-shifter hiding inside the Walls, they'd all be turned out for sure.

Mercedes shook her head. "I sent Baena and Fhalz to find you and Captain Levi."

Eve nodded once and sighed heavily. She was staring at the decapitated head of her mentor, slowly disintegrating in the snow along with the rest of the Titan body. "Thanks," Eve said softly. "I guess we can deal with this when Levi gets here." Armin didn't miss the way Mercedes eyed Eve for not using the Captain's proper title, but she said nothing about it.

The steam was clearing out with a chilly breeze, revealing Alois and Mina holding each other. Mina was crying softly into Alois' shoulder. Christophe had lent his arm as support for Doc and they were headed for them now. Eve brushed the back of her head once more and kicked at a small mound of snow that had piled up from the earlier scuffle.

Eve glanced over at him with her sideways smirk. "Sorry about that." He gave her a small smile and shook his head. Turning her attention to Mina for a moment, she gestured to her blood-splattered left side. "I don't think Leo should see me this way."

"Come on," Alois said, looking to Eve and giving Mina's shoulders one last squeeze. "You can get a bath while we wait for the Captain." Alois and Mina lead the way, with Eve taking the middle and Christophe helping Doc along after her.

Mercedes was eyeing him with a certain look that he knew he didn't want to answer to. Once the others were out of hearing range, she approached him. "I understand that the man turned into a Titan, but she takes him down and cuts off his head without batting an eye?"

Armin sighed and watched Eve's retreating form. She glanced over her shoulder at him and almost stopped. The image of her, laying in that little bed at Doc's house, covered in bandages, scrapes, and bruises came to his mind. "She deals with things like this in her own way." It was all he felt comfortable saying. Telling her about Eve's tears would have been a betrayal. The Eve that was worn out and broken down had been just another facet of her personality. It had been real, though- unguarded and raw.

"Go," Mercedes said, nodding towards the little group. Eve had remained behind while the others moved on. Alois and Mina were entering one of the little cottages while Christophe continued on with Doc to a different one. Armin tossed Mercedes a grateful look over his shoulder as he jogged for Eve. Standing there, half covered in blood with bits of snow drifting around her, she looked almost like a statue- cold and marbled.

He felt worse for asking, but couldn't stop the words: "Are you okay?"

Eve gave a hollow chuckle that sent a deep chill through him. "No." He was almost surprised that she didn't lie, but when he considered it further, she'd never actually lied to him. It was one of the qualities he'd never acknowledged, but found that he admired. "I can't deal with it right now, though. I need to get cleaned up and we have to try to explain what happened to Levi. Then I am going to spend the rest of the night with Leo." She was walking away. He could almost see her withdrawing inside of herself.

Reaching out, he caught her elbow with his hand and stopped her. She didn't turn to look at him, but she did remain in place. "You have to deal with this now." His tone was harsher than he intended, but he continued with it. "Don't let all of this build up to the point where you break down again. We won't have time for that after we leave tomorrow." Her shoulders tensed. Bracing for a verbal, and possibly physical, assault, he grimaced.

"I know," she whispered. Her shoulders fell and she dipped her head low. "Tonight." With that single word, she started walking once more. He gave a heavy sigh, watching his breath form a little cloud of fog in the air before him.

Crunching along in the snow, he made his way back to the stables. Grabbing his own, Eve's and Alois' bags, he made his way back to the little cottage Eve had entered. It was strange to spend this time away from Eren and Mikasa- especially since they'd been glued together for so long. The dynamics here were different from anything else he was accustomed to, and with Eve and Alois now seeing each other as equals, it had changed once more. Eve was no longer a fearless protector that sacrificed herself for her people. Alois was no longer a student, still learning from his mentor. They were both soldiers. They had equal shares of responsibility for the safety of their people, but they didn't have to kill Titans every day of their lives anymore.

He knocked on the door twice before Eve opened it for him. She gave him an attempted grateful smile as she took her bag, slipping the strap off of his shoulder and catching it before it hit the floor. She tossed it on the small table by the door and dug through her clothes for the toys she'd bought for Leo and the little purse she'd placed the majority of her wages in. Turning to face him, she held out her other hand and he surrendered Alois' bag to her.

"Come on," she sighed. "You can at least sit while you wait." She was back to being abrasive, but he didn't take it personally. He'd expected it. "Alois," she said loudly.

They passed through the kitchen and into a small sitting room with a worn couch, an old rocking chair, and a single, overstuffed armchair with a book face-down on the arm. The fire was burning bright and warm. Just beneath the covered window was the low-walled crib. He noticed Eve dropping the toys into the chair and carefully avoiding the crib. He left his own bag by the wall near the kitchen, but wasn't sure what else to do.

"Mina is going to rest for a while," Alois stated, stepping out of the narrow hall and shutting a door behind him. Armin knew Alois was only a year older than himself, but he looked tired and, just in that moment, more like Commander Erwin on a particularly bad day. Eve shoved the little purse against his chest and turned back for the kitchen. "What's this?"

"It's for Leo," she answered from the other room. He stood awkwardly by the fire as he listened to Eve rustling around for a moment. "I'm going to start a bath. Make some tea or something." She brushed by them without looking at either of them, but Armin could have sworn her eyes were red. Alois huffed, but nodded and went back into the kitchen.

"Make yourself at home," he sighed, snatching the kettle from the table. "I'll get this on, but I really need to run over to Christophe's. He needs to get Rosa and keep her away from here. We leave tomorrow and I'm not going to let her start another fight." Armin frowned slightly as he watched Alois pump water from the little faucet over the sink into the kettle. "I don't… I don't really know what's in here but I'm sure there's something to eat if you're hungry." He left the kettle on the little hook over the fire for it to boil, then spun for the door. "Sorry."

"Wait!" Armin almost shouted. He glanced around at the kitchen nervously. There was evidence of Mina's recent activities: bits of flour still clumped on the floor and a small pile of potatoes- only half of which were peeled. He could hear more water being pumped on the other side of the house as the pipes groaned. He sighed heavily. Eve would be a while, he was sure, and he had no idea how long Alois would be gone.

He sat at the little table and looked at the shelves. The bottom three had pots and pans of varying sizes while the top three had all sorts of food- glass jars and bunches of vegetables, and breads. There was a bag of rice on the floor, propped against the shelf. It looked like all of the potatoes were piled on the little space of counter where Mina had been peeling them. The fire warmed the kettle quickly. He found the tea set in a tiny cabinet between the sink and the fire. Grabbing the small tin of tea, he noticed the jar behind it. It was large, though it was almost empty. He hadn't had tea with honey in a very long time, so he allowed himself a small spoonful.

The house was quiet, but cozy, even as he sat alone in the kitchen with his tea. He could hear some soft sniffles, but he wasn't sure if they were from Mina or Eve, though he chanced a guess at Mina. It seemed like all she ever did was cry- from happiness or sadness, the girl always had tears in her eyes. She was very kind, though. She'd been nice to him back in their village. She'd helped Susanne out when it came to keeping them all fed.

He fixed himself a second cup of tea when it became obvious that Alois wasn't coming straight back. Just as he managed the first sip, without the honey this time, he froze. He heard rustling from the other room, followed by some gurgling, and then a soft cry. Almost spilling the cup as he jumped up, he felt himself beginning to panic. He dashed through the sitting room and gaped down at the wailing baby boy. When Mina didn't come right away, he felt his stomach sink into his feet.

"I don't know what to do," he whispered to the little boy who was reaching up and waving his hands in the air. He'd never held an infant before! He tried "shh"ing the baby, but his cries increased in volume and pitch all at once. Reaching down, he wrapped his hands around the baby's torso. He lifted him, but when the boy's head sort of flopped forward a little, he wrapped his arm underneath him like he'd seen Eve do and brought him to his chest. Like magic, Leonardo fell silent, save for a tiny yawn. Armin breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"Oh." He jerked around at the soft sound. He felt his cheeks burning before he had a chance to look away from her. Eve was standing at the end of the little hall, covered only by a towel and still dripping water. He peeked back up at her. She was smiling. It was small and a little sad, but it was in such total contrast from her red and puffy eyes and it took him by surprise. "Looks like you've got things under control."

"Not really…" Armin admitted with a shrug. He kept his eyes focused on the floor. It was hard not to focus on the little rivulets of water that were running over her arms and legs, pooling up on the floor around her feet. "I don't…"

"I don't either," she admitted. Her tone compelled him to look up once more. She was almost laughing now. "Just sit with him for a while. I'll be right back." She spun on her heel and he watched her head back down the little hall.

He took Eve's advice and sat in the rocking chair, readjusting his arms around Leonardo to a more comfortable position. His little mop of brown hair had grown longer since he'd last seen him. He was much bigger, too. Even wrapped in the soft blue blanket, Armin could tell how long Leo was. He was waving his hands in the air. His short chubby fingers wrapped around a button on Armin's jacket and tugged. He pulled his fingers away, but Leo just latched onto Armin's fingers instead. The baby gave a delighted little cry as he pulled Armin's fingers apart and towards his mouth.

"Hey," Armin muttered with a grin. The baby's wide, toothless smile was infectious. He moved his fingers back so that Leo couldn't chew on them, so he shoved his own fingers in his mouth. His gray eyes were almost absurdly large, but seemed to fit his round face. Sitting here, holding this orphaned baby in his arms, it was hard not to think about the possibility of his own children and the realization that this same exact situation would be the probable outcome.

Somehow, without his noticing, Leo had managed to grab a fistful of Armin's hair. He yanked hard and giggled at Armin's protest. He pried the slimy, drool-covered fingers out of his hair, but Leo was determined to keep a tight hold on the blond locks. For the next several minutes, they played a circuitous game of Leo grabbing Armin's hair and Armin trying to free his hair. When he heard a noise at the hall, he turned his head, earning a particularly strong tug at his hair.

"Thanks for sitting with him." Eve came around the corner into the living room, dressed in an old gray sweater and a familiar pair of black cotton trousers. He was distracted by a shout from Leo and looked down at the baby, trying once more to free the fist-full of his hair. He heard Eve approaching, but couldn't look up for the moment. He watched as Eve's fingers gently pried open Leo's chubby fist. He expected her to take the baby from him and sit down to hold him, but she stepped over to his left instead. His eyes widened with surprise when he felt her fingers raking his hair back. "Sit still," she commanded softly when he tried to pull away. In just a few swift moves, she managed to gather all of his hair from his face and secure it in a messy ponytail.

"Thanks?" he muttered, not too sure of how he liked having her pull his hair back for him. It felt too intimate, in a way. He could see better, though, and Leo's fingers couldn't yank at the long strands any longer. Eve was just staring at the both of them, her eyes drifting from Armin to the infant in his arms in a slow pattern. "Eve?"

She blinked at him a few times. There wasn't a smile or any other particular expression on her face. "Sorry. I'll go get him something to eat. Babies like applesauce, right?" Armin shrugged, but she turned and drifted into the kitchen all the same. He was confused. She wasn't her usual sarcastic and slightly bitter self, but rather hollow. It was as if she was trying to stave off her depression by refusing to feel anything at all. Personal experience had taught him that feeling nothing would only make her worse. He didn't know how to help her, though. So he waited for her to return with the spoon and small jar, stood as she sat on the couch, and left Leo in her arms.

Perhaps Doc could talk to her. Alois had his own agenda for the night- not that he blamed him, but he knew Eve needed someone to talk some sense into her or she'd be useless once they left tomorrow. He almost felt guilty for the thought, but the truth behind it lessened the sensation. He could only guess that Rosa and Christophe were still angry with her, and other than those two, the only other person he could think of was Otho. All of Eve's relationships with her people seemed strained now, though, and he didn't want to exacerbate that tension. Doc was the most logical choice for a source of wisdom.

Armin slipped out of the kitchen door into the bitter cold- made so much worse by the stinging wind laced with ice. He thought back to where he'd seen Christophe leading the elder gentleman and headed in that direction. Eve had killed a man that she'd once looked up to. That needed to be dealt with- preferably before the Captain arrived.

* * *

**A/N**: Welcome to the beginning of the end of part two! That's right, folks- this part is almost over. Part three will include the next expedition that Eve takes place in, so that's going to be tons of fun! However, and here's the sad part, I don't know when I'll be able to get around to writing part three. My college classes start back on Monday, March 2nd, so I'll be working full time and going to school full time. With two writing classes at once, I'm worried I won't have much time to do any writing for fun. Just a heads up.

I have had so much fun writing all of this, and I hope you've enjoyed reading it.

A huge, gigantic shout-out to **MercedesCarello**! Without you, I'd be hopelessly lost!

Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed. I cannot express in words how much I appreciate it.


	11. I fixed it a little

Chapter 10 Part II

* * *

A/N: So I went back and fixed up a couple of small details and added in a couple of extra things. I'm not in the right state of mind at the moment. If I fucked anything else up, let me know would ya?

Thanks to MercedesCarello for being awesome and helping me out and dealing with me. I owe you one big time. :)

(Pretty much owe you indentured servitude for the rest of my life.)

* * *

As he came upon Doc's house, he could hear angry voices nearby, but he didn't stop to listen. Instead, he raised on fist to knock on Doc's door. It took several moments, but eventually, the door opened for him. The old man was resting heavily on his cane once more. One of his sleeves was rolled up and had a few layers of gauze wrapped around it, though the blood had seeped through.

"Yes?"

Armin frowned hard, not understanding the cold tone in the old man's voice. "It's Eve," he answered. Doc sighed and turned his head to the side. "I was wondering if you'd speak to her."

"That girl…" Doc looked up at Armin, anger narrowing his eyes and hardening his expression. "She brought all of this on her own damn self! I won't see her- you tell her that!" Doc slammed the door with enough force to rattle the glass in the window nearby. Startled and disgruntled, Armin just gaped for a moment.

"Don't take that personally." Armin turned at the sound of the deep, tenor voice. He'd known who it was before he looked, but the actual sight of the large, imposing man didn't affect him the way he'd thought it would. He still harbored a small amount of resentment for Otho, but tried to stamp it down. "Doc and Susanne adopted Aldrich when he was just a little boy."

"I see," Armin muttered softly, his eyes darting back to the door for just a moment. It must have been difficult for Doc to watch Eve murder his own son- even if Aldrich had probably been about to kill them all. "I didn't…"

"Doc knows that," Otho said taking a step forward. "After Eve's brother Erik died, Aldrich essentially took his place in Eve's heart. She won't speak to any of us."

"Why not?" Armin frowned up at the dark-haired giant. Surely there was _someone_ in this village Eve could talk to. If the Captain saw that hollow, dead look in her eyes, he'd probably refuse to take her along with them on the expedition. After all, they had her maps. She herself wasn't necessary.

"Because she doesn't want us to take sides." Armin felt bitter about the answer he'd received, but it made sense. "We'll either blame her or Aldrich, and she wants neither of those things." Armin nodded once and turned to leave Doc's house. He had to figure something out, but he didn't like any of the ideas that came to mind- most of which involved being incredibly mean.

"I don't know what to do," Armin whispered softly to himself. He wasn't aware of Otho's presence behind him until he felt the large hand on his shoulder. He turned to face him and an understanding seemed to pass between them.

"She pretends to be strong, but she isn't. Eve needs someone to tell her things will be okay, that she's not as evil as she believes herself to be." Otho gave a heavy sigh, his breath fogging the air before him. Armin just watched as he turned to the left and wandered through the snow towards another little cottage. Nothing Otho had said really helped him any. He still didn't know how to get Eve to actually listen to him, and he wasn't sure he wanted to take on this responsibility in the first place.

"Get the fuck out!" The shrill scream came from just a few houses away, and the door suddenly slammed open. Alois was knocked backwards over the threshold, his backside sliding in the snow. He scrambled up and went to march back inside, but the door was slammed in his face much like Doc had done to Armin earlier.

"Crazy bitch!" Alois shouted at the door. He began to dust the snow from his uniform angrily, then noticed Armin. "What is it? Where's Mina?"

"I think she's still resting," Armin answered with a light shrug. "Eve has Leo… She's not herself."

"You expected her to be okay after that?" Alois snapped. "I know you didn't know Aldrich, but he was the entire reason our village lasted as long as it did. Sure, Micah was a big help, but Aldrich was the one who know all of the useful information. She just… she killed him, and I know she had to but… It's not easy on any of us."

"Do you think we should return to headquarters?" If Eve being around her people was only going to cause even more problems, he wondered if leaving would be the better opportunity.

Alois shrugged. "I know Mina doesn't want her around. She's just shaken up right now, but she can't bear to see Eve after watching her kill Aldrich. But that's not fair to Eve or to Leo." Armin agreed, but wasn't sure about a suitable solution to this problem. Alois gave a loud huff and ran one hand through his short blond hair. "Think you two can managed a baby for a night?"

Armin balked at the idea and was about to shake his head no. He'd already raised his hands and took a step back, but then he heard Alois' name being called. They both turned to see Mina at the window of their house, waving over to him. "I don't…"

"Can't be that hard, can it?" Alois asked with a shrug. "Besides, I want a night alone with Mina. I want to take her to go see the city and stay somewhere. She deserves it. And besides, if he gets to be too much for you, you can just take him to pretty much anyone else and they will watch him." Armin wanted to say that he understood, but he couldn't quite wrap his mind around the fact that Alois and Mina may as well have been married- they were both still so young. His thoughts drifted back to Hannah and Franz, the lovebirds from his trainee days. Everyone he knew seemed to die before they could ever have the sort of life that included marriage and children.

Alois passed by Armin, their shoulders just barely brushing as he went. He just watched as Alois went to the window and told Mina to close it up before she froze the entire house. She sort of frowned at Armin over Alois' shoulder, but closed the window all the same. Alois went into the house, leaving Armin by himself in the cold.

He'd expected some bickering between Eve and Rosa- perhaps even a physical fight, but never _this_. He wasn't sure what to tell Alois. While he understood the desire he had to take Mina out for a night alone, he didn't know anything about taking care of a child and he still didn't know what to do about Eve- not to mention what he was going to say when Captain Levi finally showed up. He aimed to turn and head into the house, but stopped at the sound of horses' hooves. Looking out, he spotted Fhalz and, to his surprise, Peter.

"Yo!" Peter shouted, waving one arm. "Where's the troublemaker?"

Armin sighed. "He's dead." Fhalz and Peter came to an abrupt stop a short distance away.

"Where's Mercedes?" the shorter boy demanded.

Armin shrugged. "I'm not sure. She's fine, though. She can tell you what happened." Fhalz eyed him with suspicion for a moment, then nodded. He jerked the reins in his hands to the side and turned his horse to head off in a different direction, presumably to go find his squad leader. Peter hopped off of his horse and moved closer to Armin.

"What's wrong?"

"Eve," Armin grumbled. "One of the people from her village that she thought was dead turned out to be alive and a Titan-shifter. She killed him. Apparently, that man was like her older brother; he's the one who taught her everything."

"Shit," Peter sighed. "Where's she at? The Captain should be here pretty soon."

"Inside with Leo," Armin answered.

Peter grinned. "Awesome," he said, "I love kids! Lead the way!" Armin sighed, but his brain was running through possibilities as he led Peter to the little house. Maybe, between the two of them, they could get Eve back in the right state of mind- at least long enough for her to explain what happened to Captain Levi.

Armin knocked on the door a few times, but at the "come in" shouted from somewhere inside, he pushed open the door. He could see Alois in the little hall, about to head into the room that Mina was in. He eyed Peter with a look of confusion, but didn't say anything. Armin made his way into the sitting room and found Eve in the exact same spot he'd left her in, though she wasn't feeding Leo, just staring at him with that same hollow expression.

"So this is the little boy you talk about all the time!" Peter exclaimed, stepping around Armin and right up to Eve. She looked up at him, her eyes widening a little in surprise. She didn't resist when Peter bent over and plucked the little boy from her lap. "Well he sure as hell ain't yours! Those big ol' eyes! Leo, right?" Eve nodded mutely, just watching as Peter held him up at began making faces, eliciting a round of giggles from the baby.

"Captain Levi will be here soon," Armin mentioned to Eve. She just shrugged and wrapped her arms around herself. He sighed and flopped down on the couch beside her. "Snap out of it!" She looked a little surprised at his shout, but didn't react with much more than her eyes widening a little.

"Come on, little man," Peter said with a goofy grin, "let's go to the kitchen." Armin just watched as Peter took the boy into the next room. It wasn't much of a separation, but he was glad for it. Eve seemed so sensitive about the way Leo saw her, even though they all knew he'd never remember her like this anyway.

"I know that you blame yourself for what happened," Armin said softly, "but you can't let it consume you. He transformed. He was probably going to kill all of us, but you stopped him. And if you hadn't killed him, then Mercedes would have." The words felt bitter, but he said them for her sake. "You don't get the luxury of wallowing in self-pity!"

Eve gave him a shadow of her usual smirk, then lowered her head. "Would you feel the same if you'd just killed Eren?" Her words cut him deep because he knew she was right. It wasn't quite the same situation, but it was close enough. "Or what if you'd just killed your own brother? He might not have been blood, but he was my family. I didn't even think about it- I just killed him."

"He was a threat," Armin muttered. "You would have killed Eren for doing the same thing."

She gave a hollow chuckle. "You're right, but that doesn't make this any easier."

"I know," Armin sighed. He stared down at his hands and frowned. "I can't make this easier for you." Looking over at her, he found her close to tears. He remembered Otho's words. "You did what you had to do, and you shouldn't feel guilty for it." She barked out one harsh laugh. "He isn't the same person you knew back then. You have to realize that."

"Do you really think that matters?" she snapped. Her hands clenched into fists in her lap. "He was my _brother_! I looked up to him! And then he goes and…" Her voice broke and the tears spilled from her eyes. "I can't believe he was a fucking _Titan_."

"But he was," Armin said softly, "and if anyone from the Military Police finds out about that, then you and all of your people will be forced back outside of Wall Rose."

There was a knock at the door, and Peter answered it. "How's it goin', Cap'?"

"What happened?" Levi demanded.

Armin sighed and stood up. He stepped toward the kitchen, but didn't bother with a salute. Eve wasn't in the right state of mind to go through the necessary explanation. He could do it in just a few words. "Someone from Eve's village that she thought was dead showed up and turned into a Titan." Levi's expression tightened, but he said nothing right away.

"Don't worry," Eve stated, appearing behind Armin, "I killed him."

"Why did I have to come?" Levi bit.

"Not my call." Armin could feel the tension forming like a thick cloud between the two of them, and he was caught right in the center. Eve's fists were tight, her knuckles turning almost white from the pressure. Levi's eyes were boring into hers. Neither of them would back down unless someone intervened.

"Hello~!" came a loud, sing-song voice. Hange burst through the door with her absurd grin.

"Shut the door!" Peter barked, gesturing to the baby in his arms. Hange gasped, slammed the door with her foot, then made a beeline for Leo, taking him from Peter's arms and dancing around with him. He glanced between Levi and Eve. They seemed to have calmed a little: Levi wasn't glaring at her like he wished she'd just burst into flames already, and Eve's fingers had fallen into a loose curl around her palms.

"Oh what a cute little boy!" Hange sang. "Those big eyes!"

"Yeah, that's Eve's kid," Peter remarked casually. Armin sighed, frustrated. He didn't want to deal with all of this silliness right now. Levi was still eyeing Eve every few seconds. Hange began making faces at the boy, and he giggled. He reached out one hand and grabbed at her glasses, leaving little fingerprints all over the lenses.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a baby?" Hange demanded of Eve, her eyes wide and accusatory. "Especially such a handsome little man!" She pressed her cheek to Leo's as she held him, cooing and humming at him.

"He was my best friend's child," Eve answered without much inflection. She was trying to push everything away again. He wanted to shake her! "What are you doing here?"

"I just followed Levi!" Hange said brightly. When she focused on Eve for a moment, her grin faded and her eyebrows knitted together. "What's wrong?"

"I had to kill a man I considered my brother," Eve said.

"Well I'm sure you didn't have a choice," Hange attempted softly. Eve bit down on the inside of her cheek and turned her head to the side. "We've all done things we didn't want to and aren't proud of."

"Have a drink and get over it," Levi remarked with a half shrug. "Just make sure you can do what's expected of you when we leave." Armin's eyes narrowed just a little and he pursed his lips. That had been a warning.

"Well why didn't ya say so!" Peter said cheerfully. He slipped the strap of the bag from over his shoulder and plopped it on a small space of counter. After a few seconds of him rifling through the contents, he pulled out a rather large glass bottle full of a rich amber liquid. "Where's a cup?"

"No," Eve said flatly. "Not here. This is not my house. You people are not staying here."

"The more the merrier," Alois came in with a contradiction, still standing mostly in the sitting room. "Mina and I are leaving as soon as she gets her things together. Eve, you could use all the help in the world when it comes to handling Leo for the night. As long as you clean up the mess, I don't care. And this is _my_ house."

"You lucky dog!" Peter shouted a little too loudly. Armin frowned and looked from Peter to Hange- both bearing erratic grins, to Eve and Levi- each with similar expressions of exasperation, but Eve's was tinted with sadness. "You gotta introduce the lucky lady before you leave."

Alois chuckled a little, then stepped to the side, revealing a slightly smiling Mina. She looked a little shy, sort of tucking in her chin to hide her face behind her hair. "Mina, this is Captain Levi, Squad Leader Hange, and Peter. Everyone, this is my fiancée, Wilhelmina."

"It's nice to meet you all," Mina said softly, attempting a smile.

"We're going," Alois said, taking the bag from Mina's shoulder. "Don't burn the place down and clean up after yourselves." With that, he took Mina's hand and they slipped through everyone in the small kitchen and headed outside. Eve followed them, but stopped at the threshold of the open door.

"I'm sorry, Mina." Her whisper was so soft that Armin almost didn't hear it over the cooing sounds from Hange and the sharp whistle of the wind outside.

"I just… I need tonight, okay?" Mina tucked her head low. Alois brought her hood up around her face for her and tucked it down by her shoulders. "I love Leo, you know I do, but he's too much for me sometimes." Eve nodded once. Alois pushed the door shut once she stepped back. She returned to the table, her hollow eyes unfocused and unseeing.

Peter had snatched one of the teacups from the little set on the table that Armin had set out so much earlier and poured some of the liquor into it. "Drink up!" He shoved the cup at Eve. To Armin's surprise, she accepted it and downed everything in the cup in a few gulps. She grimaced, but sat the cup back on the table for Peter to fill it once more. "Might wanna take it easy there, Eve. I know you haven't eaten."

"Shut up and pour," Eve growled.

"Yes ma'am." Peter quickly poured out another cupful, but rather than knock it back, Eve sipped on it. "Gonna need more where this came from. You guys stayin'?"

"No," Captain Levi said. His gaze drifted over to Hange. "Give him to Eve. Let's go."

"You're no fun." Hange still had a smile on her face. Armin was the closest to her, so she sat the baby in his arms and spun to follow Captain Levi out of the door. "See you later!" She gave a friendly wave, then the door shut behind her.

Leo gave a big yawn and Armin frowned over at Eve. She took another sip from the cup on the table, then stepped around it to take the boy from him. She cradled him in one arm and grabbed the cup with her free hand before passing into the sitting room.

Armin sighed and looked to Peter. "Do you think this is a good idea?"

Peter just shrugged and poured two more cups. He picked them both up and held one out for Armin. He took it, but didn't drink right away. "Better than just letting her stew. Maybe she'll get some of it out of her system."

"I can hear you." Eve's flat, annoyed voice filtered through from the sitting room. Peter laughed a little, then downed his cup of liquor. He held up the bottle before pouring another cup.

"Gonna need more of this," he mentioned again. He looked around the kitchen for a moment, then at Armin. "I'm gonna go get more. And some food." Armin sighed, but said nothing as Peter grabbed his bag and pulled open the door. "I wouldn't let her have any more of that until she eats." Then the door was shut and he was left staring at the bottle on the table.

* * *

A/N: I can't promise when the next part to this little finale will be written or posted. It all depends on how fucked I am between college, work, and fucking (amazing) jearmin thought bubbles (which I love) that disturb my precious sleep (sleep is a crutch, anyway, right?).

If that last sentence gives you any indication as to the state of mind I am in a the moment, well… You understand.

Hope ya liked it, anyway.


	12. Death and Life

Well, it took me damn long enough, I guess.

Here's the final chapter for the second part!

I hope you all can forgive me for the ridiculously long delay.

* * *

**Death and Life**

In the last hour, Armin had learned more than he thought possible about taking care of a baby. Thanks to Peter, Leo had been fed, bathed, dressed, and rocked to sleep. He'd laughed when Armin asked him how he knew what an infant needed. Peter just said, "When you're stepmom is only a few years older than you are and she starts cranking out kids, you either learn or… well, you just learn." Then he'd shrugged and changed the topic, artfully avoiding any and all further questions about his family.

They were all in the kitchen now, sitting at the table; though there wasn't much conversation. Eve had been less than helpful during the whole process. She'd hovered in the back of whatever room they were in, watching. Peter had asked her several times if she wanted to do something, but she just shook her head and remained silent. She was still silent now, though Peter had coaxed more drinks into her and was trying to get her to talk.

"Alright, so let me try to get all of this straight," Peter said, relaxing back in his chair and taking another sip from the blue porcelain teacup. "Aldrich was adopted by Doc and his wife Susanne when he was a kid. He was the person who came to find you and your family when the Wall fell, and he took you guys to that village. He taught you what you knew, and when your brother died, Aldrich sort of… well, replaced him." Eve's hand gripped the teacup a little harder. "Not replaced, then. Just- filled the void?" He got no answer, so he continued. "You watched him get eaten by a Titan and you never saw him again until a few days ago in the market." She nodded once. "Right. So then today you killed him and now everyone is pissed at you?"

"She didn't have a choice," Armin muttered. He'd tried to stay out of the one-sided conversation, but supplied the vocal answers for Eve when he knew what she wanted him to say. They'd been going over the details, somewhat. Everything was mentioned in one-word answers for the most part; questions were shoved between remarks about Leo's dinner or his bath.

"'Course she had a choice!" Peter downed the remainder of the liquid in his cup. Eve mimicked him. "It was either kill him or let him kill her and the rest of the village- or let him get away and then have to go with everyone when they were all forced back outside of Wall Rose." Armin sighed. The tension had been mounting between them all since Leo had fallen asleep some thirty minutes ago.

"How many people have you killed?" Eve's question was soft and dark. Her eyes were narrowed at Peter.

The larger man shrugged. "None." Something about the causal answer made Armin frown. It wasn't exactly a lie, he thought, but maybe it wasn't entirely true either. Although how that situation worked, Armin wasn't quite positive. He supposed it might have been a situation similar to Eve's before they reached the wall- maybe it was just guilt.

Armin could have laughed at the thought. "_Just_ guilt" sounded like the stupidest thing he'd come up with all day- and he didn't think he'd had a good day in the least.

"Then shut the fuck up," Eve whispered. She snatched the bottle Peter had grabbed from his hand. Uncorking it, she brought the mouth to her lips and tilted her head back. Several gulps later, she slammed the bottle on the table. The chair behind her squeaked over the wood floor as she stood. "Aldrich wasn't the only person I've killed." Her hand slid from the bottle and she drifted out of the kitchen and down the hall to Alois' and Mina's bedroom.

"Why don't that surprise me?" Peter raised one eyebrow at Armin, but he didn't respond. Grabbing the bottle, he finished off the last bit and sighed. "You try talking to her."

He really didn't want to. Maybe he was just being selfish, but he didn't want to go back there in that dark room with her. She was upset and Peter had only made it worse. What good could _he_ do by talking to her? He didn't want this responsibility. Otho's words rang in the back of his mind. She wasn't going to talk to anyone from the village, so that left himself and Peter.

"What am I supposed to say?" He looked over at Peter, a little jealous of the way his eyes were beginning to drift close. Armin was much too tense to feel tired at the moment. He found himself mimicking Peter's yawn, though.

"Look kid," Peter began. Armin's face fell flat for a moment. He wasn't a child anymore. Hell, at the rate people continued to die off around him, he was probably middle-aged at this point. "I'm no good with women. They're complicated and ornery and emotional monsters of hormones." Armin wanted to laugh again. He only just held it in, but Peter seemed to notice all the same. "But you're good with people- I've seen you talk Jean and Eren down from a fight in seconds. Use that brain of yours."

Armin grunted a sarcastic laugh, annoyed. He stood, careful not to let the chair legs scrape over the floor. It took a moment of deliberation before he stepped away from the chair. He left Peter alone in the kitchen, passing through the sitting room without a sound. The door at the end of the hall was open just a crack, but there was no light. He paused.

How was he supposed to do this? Back in Eve's village, he'd been just as useless. She didn't want to hear anything he had to say. Actions, for her, were far superior. _Words are wind._ He thought he knew the phrase from an old book, but dismissed it. He was just trying to distract himself from the painful process of struggling to figure out what to do.

This was so unlike anything he'd ever faced before. There was no immediate danger- no risk for his life or the life of his friends. Not yet, at least. It was the "yet" part that troubled him. If she went out beyond the Wall like this hollow shell of herself, then she was going to do something stupid.

He thought briefly of Mikasa wasting all of the gas in her tanks back when they were fighting for Trost. She'd risked her own life and everyone else's. What would he have done for her back then? She and Eve weren't really so unlike when he stopped to consider it. Mikasa was no leader, though. Because of everything she'd been through, she'd built walls around herself and those she loved- reserving only a handful of spaces for the ones she cared for. He doubted that even his own death would be significant compared to Eren's. As long as she had him, she could do anything.

Rather than letting the thought depress him - he'd figured that out so long ago now that it hardly mattered anymore - he thought about Eve. She was solid, like Mikasa, facing down any dangers to protect those she cared about. She just cared about too many people. There was no way that Eve could protect everyone, but since she wanted to… He sighed hard.

"Eve?" He tapped on the door with his knuckles. It opened a little more. He already hated himself for what he was about to do.

"Come to yell at me again?" Her bitter response hit him in the gut like a sharp blow.

"If I have to." He was surprised at how much he meant the words. After a second of reflection, though, he knew that he'd already committed to doing whatever he had to do. She _had_ to come out of this… state she was in. Throwing her life away was only going to get more people killed. Levi had seen it, too.

"Well?" He pushed open the door and stepped inside.

Eve was curled up on the far side of the bed, her chin resting on her knees. The bed filled up most of the room, resting in the center and flanked by two small dressers. A longer dresser with a mirror on top of it rested against the wall opposite the bed. The window Mina had been looking out of earlier rested between the door frame and the dresser. Moonlight trickled in through the window, giving him just enough light to see Eve's red-rimmed, tear-stained eyes. He walked slowly, circling the bed before reached the side she was closest to.

"You're stronger than this." She had to pretend to be, anyway. He'd seen her force her emotions away back in the village. "Cry, hit something, whatever it takes. Levi warned you earlier. You won't get to go with us tomorrow if you're still... like this."

"I don't care." Eve wasn't looking at him, just staring at the quilt on the bed. He clenched his fists. No, she didn't care right now. He had to make her care.

Without the fire to warm this part of the house, it was much colder. Armin almost wished he still had his coat on. Instead, he grabbed Eve's shoulders and shook her. It wasn't too rough, but it did get her attention.

"Are you really telling me you'd rather stay _here_?" he demanded. "You can't tell me that you have forgotten what that will mean..."

Eve tensed. Her silence was enough to tell him that she did remember, but he wasn't going to let it go unsaid. He sat down in front of her, twisted so that one foot was still on the floor. Why was it that the stupid liquor was only just now hitting him? He felt dizzy, but pressed on.

"You made a deal, Eve. You have to prove that you're useful." He grabbed her wrist, jerking her a little just to get her to look at him again. He didn't want his next words to fall on deaf ears. "Your people will be forced to leave if you don't go tomorrow. They will die."

"I know," she whispered. The tears had come again, but he wasn't done. She needed to get to the point where she wasn't going to breakdown on the other side of the Wall. A few tears weren't enough. He sighed. This was going to be the hardest part.

"If you don't get this out of your system, then you will be killing them all. Just like Aldrich. Their blood will be on _your_ hands."

It didn't hurt at first, it was just a shock. She'd hit him hard enough to almost knock him down over the mattress, but he straightened. Then the pain flared, and he grabbed the left side of his face just under his eye.

"You don't have to tell me that." Her voice was soft. Even in the dark, he could see the faint glint of tears on her cheeks. "I will be fine."

"You call this fine?" He grabbed her wrist and held it up, prying her fingers open and turning her palm so that she had to see the blood where her nails had dug into her skin. "You're not fine, Eve. If you have to hit me, then do it. But this... acting like you don't feel anything at all is not helping!"

He waited. It wasn't until he sucked in air that he realized he'd been holding his breath. He expected her to hit him again, almost wanted her to if it would make her feel better. She didn't. He let go of her wrist and watched as it fell into her lap. The silence in the room was tense, colder than the temperature outside.

He'd reminded her of her people, at least. She said she knew, but he doubted she was really thinking it through. There was nothing to be done about that for the moment. Hitting the same nail on the head after it had been driven home wasn't going to accomplish anything. He needed to move on to the next thing. But what _was_ the next thing?

"Then tell me what will help." Her whisper was choked with tears. He almost missed what she'd said. With a sigh, his shoulders slumped.

"I don't know." He wished he did. "Go pick a fight with Peter or something. He won't mind, and you'll feel better after. You felt better after you fought with Levi." As strange as it had been, she really had felt a lot better. Her resolution had solidified once more. But this wasn't exactly a question of her willingness to continue to do what was required of her… Eve was going to go tomorrow, as long as someone would let her. It was this… shell she'd become that needed to be revived back into her whole person.

"That was different." She turned her face away from Armin. "I just killed my brother. I don't know how to deal with that."

He didn't know how to help her adjust. He chewed his bottom lip for a few seconds as he thought. What else did he know about her? Actions, yes. And caring, too. But he'd covered those bases already. It was time to figure something else out. The errant consideration of what he would give for a piece of paper to jot down notes brushed his mind, but he pushed it away. Now wasn't the time for stupid jokes.

"I'm not telling you to get over it." Armin grabbed her hand and looked at the smears of blood. He sighed. "You just can't... be a ghost. It's not going to be easy, but wallowing in self pity doesn't suit you. You know what needs to be done. Now you just have to get up and do it." Back to action again, he guessed. The words weren't enough, though. He knew that, but he didn't know what else he could say.

"And if I break down again?" She was serious. That was cause for concern. "What then? When we are out there... surrounded by Titans and running for our lives... if I break down again..."

He smiled. It wasn't a grin, really just a twitch of his lips, but it was enough for Eve to scowl. "You won't. Not when we are fighting Titans, at least. You'll put it behind you long enough to take care of everyone, just like you did in your village."

"How do you know?" Her tone was almost accusing. "How _can_ you know that?"

Armin shrugged. "I just do."

And he did. Somehow he didn't doubt her for one single second when it came to fighting the Titans. His thoughts were more concerned with after the fighting was over. When they lost someone else - because it always happened - he didn't want her to slip right back into the shell she was in now. Even if it was someone she didn't know personally, it could still send her straight back to this mess. And if it was someone she did know and care about… he sighed.

"You're not helping." Her voice was flat, but he could almost detect a trace of humor underneath the monotone.

"Not as much as I'd like." He wasn't afraid to admit that to her. It was just now, though, that he realized he didn't really know that much about her. He knew she cared too much and that she hated the responsibilities she'd been saddled with, but he also knew that the care she had for her people was what kept her tied to them. Every death was going to be her fault. It was maddening. Sometimes bad things just happened and there wasn't any one person to blame for it. But she didn't see things that way. He knew she valued action, too, but action was one thing he was unsure of at this point. He wasn't up for a fist fight.

What else did he know? Almost nothing else. He wanted to laugh at himself, but kept it buried inside of his mind. He'd thought he was good at reading people. Somehow he'd been blinded by this woman. She was strong in her own way, but she was also weak. He wasn't accustomed to anyone showing weakness anymore. Weakness was something for the dark hours of the night, alone and where no one could hear. Eve had waved her weakness in their faces and felt proud to do so- admitting her shortcomings and embracing them. If only getting her to see how hollow she looked now was that easy…

He flinched when she raised her hand again. She frowned, but didn't say anything. Her fingertips traced over his cheek where she'd punched him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." He knew he deserved it. He'd been cruel. The guilt of what he'd said was going to eat at him for days, he knew, but it was still worth it. "I'm going to get something to clean up your hand." He didn't have any other answers at the moment. Maybe getting away from her and having a breath of icy-cold winter air would help him reason out some sort of solution.

"No." She reached over and grabbed the sweater she'd had on earlier. He hadn't even noticed she was down to a thin, black, sleeveless undershirt. She wiped away the blood. He was glad the little cuts weren't still bleeding. "Thanks, I guess..."

"Don't." He looked away, down at his boots. "I don't deserve it." His own guilt had begun earlier than he expected it to.

Her fingers were under his chin, bringing his face back up so that she could look at him. "You won't let me apologize and you won't let me thank you..." She fell silent for a moment, a small, wry smile tugging at her lips. "You and Otho are more alike than I would have thought."

He was about to open his mouth, ready to protest. She didn't give him the chance. Before he realized what was happening, she'd leaned forward. Both of her hands were around his shoulders somehow, locking him in place as her lips pressed to his. Her lips moved, and his hands found her waist. His mind was going faster than he could process, his body moving before he realized what was happening.

She broke away for a moment and he licked his lips. He could taste the salt from her tears and the liquor from earlier. His hands were at her shoulders before she could kiss him again. Between being mean to her and getting punched, he'd forgotten how much she'd had to drink. He'd had a few kisses before, but he never expected himself to have such a hard time pushing someone away. Eve just flashed her crooked smirk at him. She darted forward and planted a kiss on the cheek she'd punched earlier.

"I'm not sorry." She pulled her arms away and sat back down. He didn't know what to say to her. All thought had somehow stopped. "I know what I need now." She climbed off of the edge of the bed and went to the dresser. She'd left her coat on top. Slipping into it, she looked over at him.

"Where..." Armin felt frustrated with himself. His mind was so scrambled he couldn't even form a coherent sentence.

"You can sleep in here." She grabbed one boot and slid it on, not bothering with the laces or the buckles. "I... Don't take this personally, but I'll be back later." Realization hit him like a blow to the gut. Somehow he knew she was going to go to Otho.

He nodded and watched her step into the other boot. The room grew a little brighter when she opened the door, but she didn't look back. Seconds later, the other door opened and closed and she was gone.

Armin dressed himself for bed in a daze. He'd had one cup to every four that Peter and Eve had downed, yet he felt unsteady on his feet. The absurdity of the situation made him want to laugh and cry at the same time.

He wandered into the sitting room to check on Leo, but found Peter stretched out on the couch with his head closest to the crib, snoring softly. Leo was still sound asleep. He wondered how anyone could sleep through the chaos that was blowing through his mind. He went back to the room. There was nowhere else to sleep.

Despite feeling exhausted from the day, he had a hard time getting himself to go to sleep. He could only think about Eve. He kept seeing her: curled up in that basement the first day he'd met her, slicing open the Titan that almost killed Jean, broken and sobbing in the bed at Doc's house, hitting the ground right before they reached Wall Rose, grinning after her fight with Captain Levi, laughing with everyone else at the way Sasha Sasha and Connie had teased Jean and Mercedes, her joy while racing Alois, covered in blood after killing Aldrich, and her lips on his.

He scolded himself. Told himself to stop thinking. He could reason everything out tomorrow when his mind wasn't so clouded.

But the swirl continued, some images changing, some repeating every time he lopped back to the beginning. There were thoughts sometimes, but the nagging curiosity of what she would have done if he hadn't pushed her away clung to the back of his mind. Sleep claimed him at last, though it wasn't as peaceful as he might have hoped.

It was Leonardo who woke him. The shrill screams for food or a clean diaper or just some attention echoed throughout the small house. Armin sat up with a sigh. When the quilts around him were snatched nearly away, he looked to his left. Sleep fled in the wake of surprise.

Eve had snatched the quilts away to bury her head, but he knew it was her. Her back was towards him, but there was no mistaking the crown of auburn hair poking out of the top. He nudged her gently. She groaned in response.

"Five more minutes," she slurred. He sighed and allowed himself a small smile. One thing he'd forgotten last night: she hates waking up early. He reached one hand over and shook her shoulder. He'd learned by now that she wouldn't try to punch him when he woke her up- unlike a range of other people he knew.

"Eve!" Peter was shouting over the baby's cries, but that only made Leo scream louder. Eve moaned and snatched Armin's pillow from behind her head to cover her ears. He just shook his head and crawled out of bed. Whatever last night had brought about, this morning was nothing more than exactly what he'd expected.

He tugged on the same pair of white pants from the day before, having long become adjusted to wearing the same set of clothes for a couple of days (at least) at the time. He had two more uniforms in his bag, but he'd be lucky if he got to wash the one from yesterday (and today) before he'd worn the other two at least twice as well. The luxury of washing his clothes had faded sometime during his days as a Cadet.

He shrugged out of his night shirt and found the light green button-down shirt, shoving his arms though the sleeves and managing the buttons as fast as he could. Leo was still screaming at the top of his lungs. Rather than bother with the straps for his gear, he went to the other room and found Peter in the same position as Eve- curled up with his back to the world and a pillow over his head. He did not envy them.

With a small chuckle, he reached into the little crib and picked Leo up like Peter had shown him the night before. His cries softened, then faded as he stared up at Armin with curiosity in his big round eyes. Struggling to remember everything Peter had said last night about warming up the goat's milk, Armin headed for the ice chest in the kitchen.

"Thanks." Peter's groan was muffled by the pillow over his head. Armin just shook his head again and grabbed the basket that Peter had pointed out the night before. It was wicker and deep, but layered with blankets. He could leave Leo in it for a moment while he started the fire in the kitchen and grabbed a pot to fill it with water.

By the time Peter finally crawled off of the couch, Armin had managed to feed Leo and change his diaper. It was strange to do it himself, but he managed. Leo surprised him at every turn, working with him rather than against him (which, to hear Peter tell it, was a miracle in and of itself). He and Armin sat at the table with tea. By the time Peter roused himself into making breakfast, Armin judged that it had to be close to eight in the morning. They were departing at noon, and the ride to Trost would take a little more than an hour at a regular pace.

"I reckon Alois and his lady will be back soon," Peter remarked, cracking the third egg into the skillet. "See if you cain't get lazy-bones in there to get her ass out of bed." Armin felt like he was sighing all the time lately, so he held back the one that almost came forth. He left Leo in the basket, content with the little wooden bear Eve had brought him the day before. Heading for the room in the back, he found himself thinking of the coming ride.

He didn't think to knock.

Eve's bare back was to him. The single second it took for the both of them to react felt like an eternity. Eve's arms shot up to cover her chest as she glared over her shoulder, ready to shout. Armin was already apologizing, closing the door and retreating. He could feel the hot flush burning its way up his neck into his cheeks.

Peter just laughed. And laughed and laughed. Even Leo was gurgling his little laughter. Armin sank into a chair, staring at the surface of the table and refusing to look anywhere else. He hadn't seen anything- not really. After a moment, he calmed down and the flush receded.

"How much did ya see?" Peter teased, sliding a plate down in front of him. There were two eggs and a few slices of bacon. He went back to the skillet.

"Just her back," Armin muttered. He grabbed the fork and poked at the runny yolks of his eggs. He could still picture her: the back of her head nearly shaven in the spot where her braid had been, her eyes cutting over at him, and her back…

"So you saw those scars, then, huh." Peter was cracking eggs into the skillet. Armin didn't answer, just waited for some sort of explanation.

None came.

But Eve did. She flopped into a chair beside Armin and snatched a piece of bacon from his plate. "Sorry. I thought you were Peter."

"Hey!" Peter protested. He waved the spatula at her, but had to tend to the eggs before they burned.

"You're the pervert who likes to look," Eve said with a shrug.

Peter fumed, tossing both of the eggs onto a plate before tossing in more bacon. "We'll see what ya say the next time ya need me to tape up your busted ribs!" Eve just laughed.

Armin wasn't sure where this was coming from. He was too cautious to be grateful for her change. This was too sudden. Every now and again, he would catch her pause just before she took a bit of food, a deep frown on her face. She recovered quickly each time, though, and finished up most of what Peter had cooked. Just as he was gathering the dishes to help wash them, Alois and Mina returned, both with pink cheeks from the brisk winter air.

"Enjoy your night?" Eve asked, with only the faintest hint of malice. Alois didn't catch it, but he thought Mina might have.

"Yeah." Alois wasn't really paying much attention to her, though. He was watching as Mina went to Leo and picked him up. The infant gurgled up at her cooing.

"Well let me go grab my stuff and then you can change into your uniform." Eve glanced at Armin for a brief moment and they headed to the back of the little house to gather up their bags and gear.

"What is it?" He could see Eve on the other side of the bed, holding the strap of her bag in her hand. She wasn't moving, just staring at the gear assembly on the floor against the wall. "Eve?"

"Thanks." She looked up at him, a small smile on her face. He wasn't surprised to see her eyes red and shining with tears she didn't let escape.

"F-for what?" He wasn't sure how to handle her or of what to say.

"Peter was right, you know. I replaced my brother with Aldrich for those two years. And I did have a choice - but I made the right one. I know I did." She paused long enough to bend down and grab her gear. "You were right, too."

"What… what now?" He felt stupid for asking, but it was all he could think of. Whatever she'd come up with, it was of her own design. He just wanted to know her motives.

"I'm going today." She shrugged lightly as she walked around the bed. "I can't say I'm okay just yet, but I'm getting there. I was given last night to wallow in my self-pity. I don't get that luxury anymore."

Armin was silent for a long while after that statement. He followed her into the sitting room and he, Eve, and Peter began working at the straps for their gear. Eve was the only one lagging behind them, but every few moments, he would see her grasp at her side. He only kept silent because Peter had seen it as well. Had she hurt herself worse than they expected during the test yesterday? He doubted she'd broken or fractured her ribs again, but it was cause for concern.

He helped her with the last couple of straps, adjusting the ones across her back for her when she began tugging at them to tighten them up. She muttered her thanks, but didn't look at him. Her attention was focused on Leo once more, holding him and smiling at him. He and Peter donned their coats, gloves, and cloaks before heading out to the stables.

"Think she'll be okay?" Peter was grabbing his saddle. Armin shrugged as he mimicked his actions. "She didn't seem... "

"She said she was going to be okay," Armin muttered. "She said you were right."

Peter grinned and laughed. "'Least she finally learned to listen to someone!" Armin returned a half smile, but considered Peter's words. He was right. Eve didn't often listen to anyone else's suggestions or opinions, she just stuck to what she knew. He supposed even that had to change at some point. It did worry him, though. Her stubbornness kept her loyal to her people, if not herself.

Just as he and Peter finished with the horses, Eve and Alois appeared by the stables. They were each carrying two bags in addition to their own. Eve had Armin's bag and Alois had Peter's, but apparently Mina hadn't let them leave without food to take along.

"Ready?" Alois asked. Armin didn't fail to notice how distant he was from Eve for the moment, but he still had the strangest expression. He looked excited and depressed all in the same turn.

"Let's go," Peter announced. He and Eve set off first, with Alois and Armin falling just a small distance behind.

"Alois?"

He looked up and over at Armin with that strange expression once more. "I'm… Mina…"

Armin held his breath for a moment. Eve was half turned back to look at them.

"I'm gonna be a dad…"

* * *

Dun dun dun!

Please review. :3


End file.
